Date Lab: Is he flirting or telling lies?

Sunday, February 20, 2011; W08

7:30 p.m., Brasserie Beck, downtown

Graham: I was a bit excited. I walked in the door at [about] 7:30 [and] sat at the bar and ordered a beer.

Anne: I think I was a little anxious. I broke my femur three weeks ago and had surgery. [Before the date,] I had physical therapy, and I worked for the first time, so I was a little tired. It was around 7:30 when I got there. The host and hostess seemed excited, so that calmed me down a bit. They led me over [to the bar].

Graham: I got a light tap on my shoulder, and it's like, "Here's my date." She's on crutches. I was like, Okay, that's interesting. I don't think I have a type, but she was cute. She had really nice eyes, a nice smile, she seemed like a really sweet person. I'm definitely into that.

Anne: We introduce ourselves, and he gave me a hug. I found him attractive. I don't know if he was the type of person that I have dated in the past, but he was dressed very nicely, and that's a big plus. And he was very friendly. He had a big smile on his face.

Graham: We go over to the table, and it takes a minute or two to get situated, and I was like, "Okay, look, I've gotta ask: What's up with the leg?"

Anne: It was somewhat of an icebreaker, but it was interesting because it wasn't the first thing he said to me. I'm so used to it being the first thing out of people's mouths. He asked me if I like beer. I do, but I'm not a huge beer-drinker. Then he talked about how he works at Two Amys and does the beer selection. That intrigued me.

Graham: There aren't many people that are as passionate about beer -- and beverages in general -- as I am. Later on, when I noticed that she wasn't drinking [her beer] so much, I offered to get us some wine instead. She said no, that she was fine. I was just concerned that she was enjoying what we were doing. I feel like for the first part, I was talking a bit more than her. She struck me as being a little nervous.

Anne: I don't always feel quite like myself because I'm on crutches, and I just haven't been out of the house that much. We talked a lot about the way that we are in our personalities -- being comfortable about ourselves, being a little more outgoing and getting to a point where you're older and not so concerned about how others view you.

Graham: There was a little flirtation and sexual chemistry. But it wasn't too over the top. She said, "I'm such a bad liar." And I said, "Oh, let me tell you how to lie." I was like, "If you want to have someone believe what you're saying, it helps to touch them when you're saying it." I didn't bring it up with the intention of it being like, "Oh, here's a chance to touch," but when I actually did touch her, it did occur to me, Oh, she's not actually resisting that.

Anne: It was a running joke through dinner. There were times throughout the night where he was touching my arm, and I didn't know if he was flirting or lying to me. We talked about what is our normal type. [For me], it's more about their personality and where they are in their lives. As the night went on, that was what I was more attracted to. He's an interesting person, and it seems like he's grounded and very comfortable with himself.

Graham: She seemed like a pretty smart girl [and] had some good insights on things. [But] normally I tend to go for people that are more bubbly. She seemed a lot more reserved.

Anne: There was no dessert or coffee, but we were the last people there. It was, like, 10:15 when we left. Then we ended up going to Masa 14.

Graham: I said, "Oh, sweet, we can go there and get some tequila flights." Flights are fun. They give you a little half-shot of each [type of tequila], so we tasted each one in order and talked about the difference.

Anne: We closed out the evening at about quarter to 12. He brought me home, and we exchanged numbers.

Graham: It had occurred to me at various points throughout the dinner, like, I wonder if I'm going to try to kiss her at the end of the night? But I didn't really get [the sense] that she was down for the full make-out.

Anne: It was a little awkward, because he was holding the door for me and the concierge was there, so I went with the cheek kiss at the end. But it could have gone either way. I would [rate the date] a 4 [out of 5]. I definitely had an enjoyable evening. If he asked me out, I would go out with him again.

Graham: I would say it was like a 3.5. I thought she was great, and I'd hang out again. I feel like under different circumstance, we might have made a stronger connection.

-- Interviews by Christina Breda Antoniades

Update: The two have traded texts, but getting together again "just didn't come up," Graham says. So, no second date so far.

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