Punchline Politics

Rush Limbaugh , describing the settlement of his drug case, says he no longer feels the urge to pop painkilling pills.

McCain for SecDef? In the Weekly Standard, the idea registers high on the Ari Richter scale:

"No one can match McCain's eloquence when it comes to talking about being a part of a cause larger than oneself. That's the message Americans need to hear--and believe--if there's any hope of regaining widespread public support for the difficult work ahead in Iraq.

"Okay, but what about McCain? He wants to be president, not a cabinet member. What's in it for him?

"Like it or not, his political fate is already tied to what happens in Iraq. Although he's been clear in his disagreements with Rumsfeld, McCain nevertheless embraced the war as appropriate and continues to insist on success. If, say, Sen. Allen has also been a steadfast supporter of the war, many Americans don't know it simply because most Americans still don't know him. McCain (the senior senator from Meet the Press) has no such cover.

"And yet, as a senator, there's almost nothing McCain can do to change our fortunes in Iraq. As secretary of Defense, on the other hand, he could certainly make an impact. At the same time, he would be freed from the burdens of the Senate, which although exceptionally fertile ground for presidential ambition is notoriously unproductive soil for victorious campaigns."

Take it from me: It would blow up his campaign like an IED.

By the way: Did you really think that Bill Frist & Co. would tax the oil companies?

"Senate Republicans on Monday hurriedly abandoned a broad tax proposal opposed by the oil industry and business leaders, another sign of their struggle to come up with an acceptable political and legislative answer to high gasoline prices," says the New York Times.

Why? Can't be offending the base: "The retreat came after a torrent of objections from business leaders and their advocates, who typically view Republicans in Congress as allies. They said they had been blindsided by the inclusion of the proposal as a central element of the Republican leadership's energy package late last week."

Kevin Drum is getting gas pains:

"I'll confess that I'm a little tired of columns expressing outrage about our bipartisan temper tantrum over $3 gasoline -- where were these guys last year when Dick Cheney's energy industry giveaway passed? -- but there's certainly no arguing with the underlying charge:

"Most Republicans, constrained by an ideological resistance to federal regulation, have always opposed tougher mandates. But achieving better fuel economy was once a passion of Democrats. In 1990, 42 of the Senate's 55 Democrats -- about three-fourths -- voted to require automakers to reach 40 mpg by 2001. That bill drew 57 votes overall, but failed amid opposition from President George H.W. Bush and a Republican-led filibuster.

"Idiots. But then there's this:

"Under pressure from the auto companies and auto workers, Democrats have retreated ever since. President Clinton didn't seriously try to raise fuel economy standards. Last year, a proposal from Sen. Richard J. Durbin (D-Ill.) to require a 40-mpg average for cars by 2016 drew just 28 votes; only about half of the Senate's 44 Democrats voted yes. Those voting no included every Senate Democrat considering a 2008 presidential bid.

"Idiots. Mileage standards work. If we had passed that bill in 1990, oil consumption in the United States would probably be 10% lower than it is today at virtually no cost to the economy and no inconvenience to consumers. That's a savings of about two billion barrels of oil a year -- and there are other things we could do to double that number with only modest pain.

"(And ANWR? If Republicans were willing to act like grownups on the efficiency side, I'd say we should just open the damn thing up. It won't make a lot of difference, but at the same time, it also won't cause very much damage.)"

Well, you can't call Anna Nicole Smith a gold-digger any more. Now you have to call her a gold-digger with a unanimous Supreme Court ruling under her, uh, belt.