Nattering Negativity

"But Kerry has been active in politics for more than three decades. He's been a U.S. senator for more than 20 years. He spent two years running for president. In his career, he's probably given -- what do you figure? 5,000 speeches? 10,000? 20,000?

"So how could he possibly have screwed up a simple little piece of snark like that? After all these years, does he still get so flustered in front of a camera that he can't even get a simple three-line joke straight? Sheesh."

Was Kerry right about the troops? No, says Robert VerBruggen in the Weekly Standard:

"There's nothing to be offended about, because Kerry's words were simply incorrect. In fact, members of the armed forces are more often high school graduates, and more often of above-average intelligence, than average Americans.

"Last year, the Heritage Foundation took the time to study soldier demographics. The resulting report, 'Who Bears the Burden?' disproves many of the stereotypes members of the military face. Pertinent to Kerry's comments, the study found that soldiers actually tend to have more education than the general public.

"'If one single statistic could settle this issue, it is this: 98 percent of all enlisted recruits who enter the military have an education level of high school or greater, compared to the national average of 75 percent,' according to the report.

"Of course, because military service often starts right after high school, a lower proportion of recruits have college experience."

Is Karl Rove's secret weapon . . . absentee ballots?

"Down in the polls and with their majorities in Congress at risk, Republicans say they have some good news in early-voting statistics that suggest their voter-turnout machine is providing an edge in some tight races," the Wall Street Journal reports.

"If the trend holds, it could mean that early voting is growing -- and continuing to benefit Republicans, who exploited the practice in the 1990s. Experts say early voters could be a bigger factor this year when overall voter turnout could be lower than in 2004, a presidential-election year.

"This year, though, Democrats contend that Republicans are exaggerating their successes so far, by highlighting a few races, while ignoring problems they are having in motivating their troops around the country."

I thought I'd heard every possible anti-Bush argument, but no. Shelley Lewis has a new one:

"If you have one chance to convince an undecided Independent or a Republican to vote Democratic this year, I'd like to suggest the following:

" The Bush administration would like to spend your taxpayer dollars on convincing unmarried men and women not to have sex before age 30 .

"Yes, Abstinence Only--if it's good for the 'tweens, it's great for the twenty-somethings. The Department of Health and Human Services, which administers the 50 million dollar program, has issued new guidelines telling the states that they can get funding to teach abstinence to anybody up to age 29."

And at 30 it's okay to do more than lust in your heart?