Career Track Live

Advice for Young Professionals

The Washington area is a magnet for smart, ambitious young workers. Post columnist Mary Ellen Slayter writes a regular column for these professionals who are establishing their careers locally, and offers advice online as well.

Read Mary Ellen's latest Read Mary Ellen's latestCareer Track column.

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The transcript follows below.

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Mary Ellen Slayter: Good afternoon!

My most recent column was a bit of a rant about early pressures on children to begin planning for a career. What do you think? Are we helping the kids in our lives get ahead in the world world when we bring these subjects up in middle school? Or are we needlessly pressuring them? What's the right balance?

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College Park, Md.: I'm a senior at UMCP in the process of applying for jobs. I just received my first job offer, but I still have more interviews scheduled. How long can I wait to accept the first offer without risking losing that? (The job looks good, but the other interviews I have are closer to what I actually want to be doing.) Thanks for the help!

Mary Ellen Slayter: With honesty and tact. The way you handle these situations will affect your habits and reputation for years to come. Stall a bit with the people who have already made an offer. Approach the other places you're interviewing with and see if they can hurry up the process a bit.

What you do not want to do is accept that current offer, only to drop it a month from now when you get an offer you like better.

I was at a professional conference last week, where I was approached by a young woman who had already accepted one summer internship when she was approached by a competitor for a full-time job. Her instinct was to honor her previous commitment, and she planned to do so, but she was shocked that other people were encouraging her to just switch. My feeling is if the other people want her so bad, they can wait the two months until she finishes her internship.

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Washington, D.C.: I think today's Metro story about the bright young stars at Einstein HS in Maryland who have committed suicide recently helps answer your question.

washingtonpost.com: The article referenced: washingtonpost.com:The article referenced:Teens' Suicides Breed Anxiety , (Post, April 24)

Mary Ellen Slayter: I read that story this morning. Heartbreaking.

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Alexandria, Va.: Need some advice on learning to manage people both inside and outside of the workplace. I manage two people during my regular "9-5" job and many volunteers as part of an organization I work with regularly.

In the past few weeks, I have had to deal with several "difficult" personalities, particularly one person who is the most self-absorbed individual I have ever met. It's very difficult to work with her because she feels once she has accepted an assignment, no one can provide input. In addition, she doesn't seem capable of asking for help until the last minute and then resents it when the help isn't in the form of what she needs.

This person isn't going away any time soon and as I continue to get involved in the group, I need to have some way of handling her. I have thought about refusing her assistance but that's another can of worms altogether.

washingtonpost.com: Here's a Q&A on the topic of management -- Harvard Business School's Linda Hill was "on the microphone" for this one: washingtonpost.com:Here's a Q&A on the topic of management -- Harvard Business School's Linda Hill was "on the microphone" for this one:Becoming a Manager .

Mary Ellen Slayter: I can't remember who first said this, but people can't really be "managed." You have to lead them.

Your goal should not be to control this woman, but to figure out how to best channel her strengths to help your organization. I mean, some people might see "won't take input" as "likes to be self-directed at work." It all depends on the context.

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Silver Spring, Md.: I don't know about kids thinking about careers, though it does drive me insane that there's such a focus on having to have an internship during breaks and over the summer. I feel bad for kids growing up, that they won't be able to spend their summers relaxing. And I say this as someone who's only been out of college for six years.

Mary Ellen Slayter: Internships are crucial when you're 19; they are ridiculous when you're 9.

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Rockville, Md.: Recently, two of my colleagues got their reviews, and they shared the boss's comments with me. They were unhappy with their reviews, even though they received satisfactory marks despite being pretty unproductive and negative workers. (I like them personally, but they hardly do any work and spend most of the day making personal calls.)

My annual review is coming up, and I am pretty sure it will be a good one, as my productivity outpaces theirs and my work doesn't need as much editing. My co-workers have indicated that they expect me to share my boss's comments with them, but I don't want to, since it's my own business and I think they'll get into a snit.

How should I handle this? I'll probably tell them I did fine and not elaborate, but they will probably pressure me. If I share how I did, they may make life difficult for me at work. It all feels so high school, but these women are 15-20 years older than I am.

Mary Ellen Slayter: Your review is your business. I can't say I have ever had a single job in which co-workers were expected to discuss the contents of reviews. In this situation, I'd just go into privacy autopilot when they brought it up. "Sorry, but I don't feel comfortable discussing this." And I'd walk away when they started discussing their reviews. (Too late for this year, I know.)

Besides, are there any real consequences to these women getting into, as you say, a snit over this?

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Fairfax, Va.: I think it's ridiculous to push kids to decide what their future will be at such a young age! I'm a commercial property manager and it is very safe to say that no one dreams of growing up to manage an office building! It's a great job, though. I've only been in this business for four years and I've worked my way up from an office assistant to general manager and went from making $35,500 in 2001 to $88,000 today!

Most people don't know anything about this job and it's a fantastic job for a liberal arts grad. I was an English major and thought I wanted to be an editor until I saw those starting salaries. Tough to live on in D.C.

Mary Ellen Slayter: There are lots of jobs like that, that can be immensely satisfying, but you're not likely to be able to make that judgment until you're grown up. I bet it would just look bo-ring to a fifth grader.

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Washington, D.C.: Hi, I've just begun looking for a new job -- it's really my first job search since the job I currently have is the result of a college internship. My question is what happens when you apply for a number of jobs, interview for them, take one and then later get offered a job by another company. I have no idea if this is a common situation, but what is the proper thing to do, especially if the job you are offered seems more appealing than the one you have been working at for a week or two?

Mary Ellen Slayter: Stick it out. If it's a great job, it'll be great in a year as well. Unless you're miserable at the current job, it's just not worth it to burn those bridges.

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Anonymous: What would you say is the number one mistake rookie interviewees make?

Mary Ellen Slayter: Being unprepared. It shows up in the details, like the time you show up, what you're wearing, and whether you can intelligently discuss the organization's needs and how you can fill them.

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Internships: I found the whole internship thing really frustrating -- my parents didn't coddle me and I had to take summer jobs so I could pay for my part of my college tuition, books, etc. I would have taken an unpaid internship if I could, (Paid internship in my field? Hah!) but I couldn't have done it and still been eating at the end of the semester. Not having an internship didn't hurt me terribly when I was job hunting, but I think I would have had more interviews if I'd had that kind of experience.

Mary Ellen Slayter: I never had an internship, either, for the same reasons.

There were summers where I had one job for the money (waiting tables) and one for the long-term professional experience, which was usually poorly paid and only a few hours a week. Sure, it meant my life wasn't as fun as it could have been as a college student, but hey, I have lots of fun now.

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Woodbridge, Va.: I had submitted my resume for two different but similar positions in two different practice groups within the same company with the hopes that I will be interviewed for at least one of the positions. I have now been approached by both practice groups for an interview. Would it look bad if I were to interview for both positions since they are within the same company?

Mary Ellen Slayter: No, but please tell them what's going on before the interviews.

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Washington, D.C.: I am a recent graduate and have been with this company for almost nine months working in the IT department as an entry-level PC tech. The AA for department is getting ready to go on maternal leave and now all of her duties are going to be given to me on top of my current duties in my position. Do you think it is wrong for me to bring up the question about a temporary raise while I am basically doing both jobs on my entry-level pay?

Mary Ellen Slayter: It's not wrong, exactly, but it may not be the best long-term tactic. Wait until your annual review and point to the extra contribution you're making as the basis for a permanent raise. I mean, why settle for a temporary one?

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Arlington, Va.: Hi Mary Ellen, I'm sorry, but I have to disagree with you regarding the "sticking it out" with the first job you accept. I graduated in 2002, when the economy wasn't so hot and ended up accepting the first job I was offered.

Two weeks into the job, I received an e-mail from another firm for what sounded like an excellent job offering an interview. I politely turned it down since I had just accepted another job. I was miserable there, and counted down the days until my first year was up so I could look for another job.

I had so much loyalty to that firm, yet they could care less about their employees. Three years later, I am very happy with my career (luckily), but who knows what could have happened if I had taken the other job.

Mary Ellen Slayter: There's always exceptions, and "misery" is one of them.

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Oakton, Va.: Back to the original question: Are we helping the kids in our lives get ahead in the world world when we bring these subjects up in middle school? Or are we needlessly pressuring them? What's the right balance? Do kids know what they want to be at nine years old? No. But should we just let them think its OK to go to college (who pays for that?) and then get out and do what? Who pays for the rent, or the car/health insurance? I think children should at least be told that they need to think about what they want to do with their life. I e-mailed you yesterday :-) I was an early chooser.

Mary Ellen Slayter: Perhaps my attitude about this is shaped by the fact that I paid for my own college and my parents had little input in what I studied, where I worked and what I did for a living. They just trusted me to figure it out. When the time came, I did.

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Washington, D.C.: Maybe instead of pushing kids to declare majors and specializing as undergrads, more schools should just have a "liberal arts" major. You'll be well-rounded in history, English, math, and science. Those four areas can develop communications skills (oral and writing), management (people, professional relationships, time, budgets, etc.), and deductive reasoning. Those are all skills that one will need to be successful.

It really underscores a problem with our education system, maybe society, in general when you force 18-year-olds to decide on what they want to do with their lives.

Mary Ellen Slayter: I agree.

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Herndon, Va.: My boss lies about everything. Every time he opens his mouth, out comes something that is intended to either deceive or confuse. I'm starting to get sick of it. But I like the company I work for. Would it be "safe" for me to go to HR and inquire about the process for transferring? Do most HR departments automatically contact the manager when an employee visits?

Mary Ellen Slayter: You're putting the cart before the horse in going to HR. They won't be able to help you. Instead, look for a job that interests you on its own merits and happens to be far away from the watch of lying boss. Apply. See what happens.

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Washington, D.C.: Do you have any suggestions for someone who, even after graduate school, has been unable to find a career path?

Mary Ellen Slayter: The same thing I tell them before they go to grad school: Find a job that interests you. Do it for a while. If that doesn't quite fit, find another. Repeat as needed. Eventually you'll fine-tune what you need and want in a job,and what you don't. And unlike grad school, you won't have to pay for the privilege.

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Rockville again: I wish I could've walked away, but they both came to me in my cubicle. No real good opportunity to walk away without making it seem like a confrontation.

Consequences for their being in a snit? Well, we have to work with each other on projects and such, which could affect me on a professional level. It's a very gossipy department, and all the chit-chat has a way of degrading productivity. I can just see there being an unpleasant working environment, but hopefully it wouldn't last too long.

Mary Ellen Slayter: You just have to try to rise above it.

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Severna Park, Md.: About talking careers to middle school children -- I seriously doubt these children will be any happier, more successful or wealthier because they were introduced to careers earlier. I think a parent and education system would be better off stressing things like how to get along with other people, how to handle yourself in various situations, how to behave -- all the things that help a child grow to be independent, well-rounded and self-assured. I would much rather spend my time with someone with these traits than someone that was career-focused at 13.

Mary Ellen Slayter: Thanks for chiming in.

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Washington, D.C.: As someone who hires young people both for jobs and internships in a nonprofit, I almost never hire someone who has only had internships but never a job. I always ask someone if they have ever worked as a waiter or at a store or for paid employment during the interview.

I think that people who have only had internships, which by design are fun and interesting, are terrible employees because they expect work to be fun and interesting ALL the time, which is it sometimes but sometimes it's not.

My ideal is to find someone who has done both but I generally err on the side of someone who has real life experience... Just my two cents.

Mary Ellen Slayter: Interesting point.

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Columbia, Md.: I wanted to include my support of any internships -- except maybe those companies that get you to sell knives, magazines, etc.

I had a dream internship in college the first go 'round. Travel, good pay, real work, corporate hopes. I'm still benefiting from it eight years in the future.

I'm graduating again next month as an RN and took a paid externship this past year. Significant pay cut, decrease in rank, dirty job. But I love it! In return for a few months' pay cut, I got the promotion I wanted right away, awards, the experience to know what I want in a field I didn't really know that well...

If only I could get my younger siblings to understand the importance of an internship in college!

washingtonpost.com: Mary Ellen's take on internships: washingtonpost.com:Mary Ellen's take on internships:Before the Job Comes the Internship , (Post, April 9)

Mary Ellen Slayter: Another comment on internships

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Arlington, Va.: Yesterday, in your column, you asked for readers to send you an e-mail describing when the reader decided on his career. What is your e-mail address ?

washingtonpost.com: Here's yesterday's column: washingtonpost.com:Here's yesterday's column:When They Should Think About Where to Land , (Post, April 23)Mary Ellen's e-mail address is in there, but here it is again: slayterme@washpost.com . You can also e-mail her by clicking on the byline atop her article; this works for most Post writers.

Mary Ellen Slayter: For those looking for this info, as well as the original column.

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Washington, D.C.: Mary Ellen: I have a comment which will end up as a question. My son is a new college graduate (January 2006) who is having a very tough time finding a job. At present, he is interning in a non-paid position with the hope that it will provide leads to full employment.

He has applied to many positions both in the Federal and private sectors and what I find disturbing that while employment opportunities are suppose to be high in this region, many employers both Federal sector and private do not inform applicants that (1) they have received the resume/application; (2) status of the application or (3) whether you have been selected or rejected.

In my son's case, only the Office of the President (OMB) sent out a note to say his application had been received and that he would informed within 90 days. Sure enough within 90 days he did receive a letter. Unfortunately, he was not selected but at least he was notified.

In this electronic age and with text messaging how hard is to provide an applicant with the information on (a) receipt; (b) status and (c) determination? Private sector is equally at fault as the Federal and local government section. Welcome your comments on this.

Also, several of my son's friends who are in the same position he is, have found it equally frustrating to be interviewed two or three times by the same employer and still no determination has been made. Also intelligence agencies advertise for hiring new people but do not want to pay for security clearance, preferring to hire contractors who already have the security clearance.

Mary Ellen Slayter: Them's just the breaks, I'm afraid. Recruiters and hiring managers know it's frustrating to a job seeker to not get feedback, but consider it from their perspective: If they responded individually to each applicant, they'd never have time to do any other work. It's common to get thousands of applicants for a single entry-level job.

However, not contacting someone at the interview stage is inexcusable.

Similarly, consider the clearance issue from the perspective of the employer. It takes up to a year to get a clearance for someone. They want someone who want work NOW, not a year from now.

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Louisville, Ky.: Mary Ellen,

I work an entry-level job at a large company, and all employees with one year of tenure are encouraged to look for better jobs. Because of my performance, I've been encouraged to look for better positions and have been told the one-year requirement might be waived. That's great, but I don't love this industry and have applied for and been accepted to graduate school across the country.

How best to counter their offers without looking unambitious? I'm not ready to talk about graduate school (it is five months away and stuff happens), but I don't want my lack of desire for growth in the company to hurt me in performance reviews.

Mary Ellen Slayter: Apply for the jobs and see what happens. A lot can change in five months.

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Summer Intern: I'm the intern coordinator at... a company. And if one of the summer interns we've accepted for this year was offered a full-time job somewhere else, I would absolutely encourage them to take the job!

Mary Ellen Slayter: You sound like a great person to work for!

Would you still feel so charitable if they called you a week before their start date, though? And if you had already arranged housing and training for them.

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Orlando, Fla.: I'm leaving the work force after almost six years to go back to finish up my Bachelor's degree and then some. My plan is to take classes year-round until I've completed my education, leaving me little time for an internship during the summers. Would you recommend looking for an internship that also gives me course credit?

Mary Ellen Slayter: Most programs allow internships for credit. Indeed, many require them. Do what you have to do. Keep in mind, though, that work experience is just as important as those degrees in terms of securing your next job. If nothing else, it's how you develop contacts.

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Boston: Mary Ellen, thanks for the article on internships. My parents are a little out of the loop on how important they are, and it took a lot of convincing to get my younger brother to apply for them, since the pay isn't as high as construction or lifeguarding.

How do you convince the middle/lower middle classes who aren't in danger of "starving" that they should be going for a lower paying internship over a higher paying seasonal job? I'm glad my brother figured it out, but I consider him lucky!

Mary Ellen Slayter: It's tough. It helps, I think, to think of internships as a necessary part of any course of study, whether you're majoring in English or engineering.

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Pushing kids: It seems as though SOME of the younger people I work with have less of a work ethic than those of us in our 50s. It is as though they have been working from grade school until they get their first "real" job then decide that once they have it made they can slack off.

Mary Ellen Slayter: I hadn't thought of it that way, but I do think that can contribute to a sense of burnout.

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Washington, D.C.: Afternoon! I've learned a lot from these chats, so thank you already.

I've worked full-time at an agency to put myself through college in four years. How can I highlight this to make it work to my advantage in the job market. It's been quite a task and I'm rather proud of it. Thanks.

Mary Ellen Slayter: It should be clear from the dates on your resume that you worked and went to school at the same time.

I'm sure it will come up at the interview.

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Bowie, Md.: I'm a bit confused by all this talk of "pushing" kids for careers. I had career day in seventh grade. What I'd wanted up to that point changed right around then, and throughout HS I looked at several other options. After one year of college, I changed majors. My career path/ultimate goal is still changing but it's gradually becoming clearer.

In regards to the "liberal arts" major, that I think is a horrible idea because that just raises too many flags in too many peoples' minds -- justifiable or not. I think it would be better to cluster the first two years into "directions" with majors along the same paths grouped so that people can be assured that classes they take, short of the one or two specifically in their major, will fit their second or third choices if they decide to change.

In all the major changes I've seen -- very few of my friends and acquaintances throughout college left the core direction they were headed in. Engineering majors became Computer Science majors or switched from one type of engineering to the other, or became math majors, and vice versa/etc. Rarely (only one person comes to mind) did someone wake up and decide to suddenly go from CompSci to History or vice versa. But, major changes were frequent amongst most. So, "clusters" or "paths" would make sense to me. Lit/Art/History, eng/compsci/IT/Math, bio/chem/phys/sciences, etc.

Ultimately, the main thing I tell people is "You've got your whole life to figure it out, but while you're trying to get it right -- do SOMETHING so you're not standing around doing nothing 'til you're 40+."

Mary Ellen Slayter: But that's just it: Most of us aren't just standing around "doing nothing" until we're 40.

The choice isn't really between Myers Briggs at 10 or failure at 40.

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Resumes: What's your feeling on how long resumes should be? I find it hard to fit everything on one page because I'm still a recent grad and have a lot of (relevant) part-time jobs from my college days. If it's just over a page, is that okay? Or is that a big faux pas?

Mary Ellen Slayter: One page!

I know people twice your age with one-page resumes. You can do it.

And with that, our hour is up. See y'all in a few weeks!

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