Celebritology Live

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Liz Kelly
washingtonpost.com Celebrity Blogger
Thursday, May 10, 2007; 2:00 PM

When stars shave their heads, couch-jump, commit a fashion faux pas and commit random acts of tomfoolery, washingtonpost.com Celebritology blogger Liz Kelly shares the buzz, offers perspective and provides crucial links to juicy alternate news sources and, of course, takes your reaction in her daily blog.

Now join Liz each Thursday at 2 p.m. ET to gab about the latest celebrity pairings (and splittings), rising stars (and falling ones), "Lost," and get the scoop on the latest gossip making waves across the Web.

A transcript follows.

Before she started blogging about celebrities, Liz ran washingtonpost.com's Live Online section, where she enjoyed talking to really interesting people -- including some Post reporters -- on the phone. She produces both Carolyn Hax's advice discussion and Gene Weingarten's Chatological Humor.

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Liz Kelly: I'm running a bit late this afternoon. Got stuck in traffic on my way to my current coordinates here at Arlington's lovely Murky Coffee and, as luck would have it, the Internet connection is a little fritzy -- so bear with me. If need be, I will sprint the mile or so to the post.com HQ to complete this chat. Let's hope, though, things don't get to that point. I'm wearing flip-flops and the wrong foundation garments.
This week's big bombshell is, of course, Paris Hilton's 45-day prison sentence. She's gone through rage, denial and is now in the acceptance phase. With publicist Elliott Mintz now firmly tucked back into her inner circle, Paris this morning said she's not above the law and ready to face the consequences for her actions. If that's the case, I'd like to demand some restitution for her criminally bad album and movie appearances.
Last night's "Lost" was a doozy, as evidenced by the fascinating thread following today's analysis post.
We'll be foregoing a Friday list for one more week because I've got an interview with the author of the new book "Tabloid Prodigy" that I've got to run tomorrow. Just think of the release we'll get next week when we return to our normal Friday routine.
Let's rock...

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Clinton, Md.: How do I find Celebritology?

I haven't read it since the home page was redesigned.

washingtonpost.com: Celebritology

Liz Kelly: You can always just bookmark www.washingtonpost.com/celebritology -- but it's usually in the pop-out list of Columns and Blogs on the homepage and sometimes located in the Entertainment News box.
Oh, just bookmark it.

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Ashburn, Va.: Someone does not miraculously gain 15 lbs overnight like Cate Blanchett. Sure, her makeup and hair didn't help, but, that black dress is just covering up her bones that are protruding from her body. She looks awful in the photo posted today.

Liz Kelly: Okay, this is pure opinion -- I think Cate Blanchett has lost some weight. I think, tho, that the dramatic pix of her at the Costume Institute gala were assisted by a particularly dramatic set of circumstances -- namely a hefty dress (that made her look tiny), poorly done theatrical make-up and a really ratty hair do.

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Did I read that right?: Did Ms. Lohan really tell Letterman she is licensed to practice law in seven states? Is that a joke? It has to be a joke. I'm assuming that's a joke. Please explain Ms. Kelly.

Liz Kelly: Maybe she means she's broken the drinking law in seven states.

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"Jail" for Paris?: Exactly what kind of jail are we talking about sending Paris to? Not to be too dismissive of the pain of not being a free woman, but are we talking a Martha-Stewart kind of jail? Didn't that seem kind of -- petty and sorority-like? (Maybe I'm exaggerating a bit ...)

Also, as a taxpayer, I wonder what the cost for rooming and boarding Paris in prison will be?

Liz Kelly: Paris is currently slated to serve her time at Lynwood, Calif.'s Century Detention Facility.

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Boston, Mass.: I admit I feel kind of bad for Paris Hilton. I have never liked her, but, ya know, jail sucks. Is this a normal sentence for a probation violation, do you know? Because that's unfair if she's getting a harsher sentence just because she's Paris Hilton. Even though she's really really annoying.

Liz Kelly: I believe it was well within the judge's right to give Paris any sentence ranging from community service (on the light end) up to 90 days in jail. He went with the city attorney's recommendation of 45 days -- with no possibility of subbing an alternate punishment. She's going to do the time.

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Washington, D.C.: Can someone please tell me why on Tuesday the Queen changed clothes from the time she was at NASA-Goddard to her next appearance about an hour later at Children's Hospital? Thanks.

Liz Kelly: She spilled something on her queen clothes? Because blue goes better with hospitals? Because she wanted to rock that pimp hat?
Seriously, the woman needs Trini and Suzanne in a big way.

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Mommie Dearest: I pretty much think Lindsay Lohan is a train wreck ... but, her mother takes the cake. No wonder Lindsay's so screwed up.

Liz Kelly: This week mommy was there for the premiere of Lindsay's latest movie, "Georgia Rule," playing the part of of special correspondent for Entertainment Tonight.
By special correspondent, I can only assume that ET means "coat-tail riding, fame-seeking mother of major star."

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TomKat PR Blitz: Followup to last week's note about the PR offensive -- what's the incentive for someone like Jada Pinkett Smith to come out in their defense? She's married to the 'most powerful man in Hollywood' -- does she need the press that badly?

I can see why Leah Remini (show is about to wrap, fellow Scientologist) would throw in her two cents ... but JPS?

Liz Kelly: I would guess that in this case the incentive is the fact that Jada and Will are incredibly close to Tom Cruise and are leaping to his defense much as you might leap to the defense if your friend was taking a sustained beating in the press.
Combine this with the fact that Jada suffers from the misapprehension that we care what she has to say, that when Jada talks, people listen, that -- based on her observations -- the public will suddenly say "Oh, well if Jada Pinkett thinks Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes are all right, who am I to question it? Let's rent that crappy 'Matrix' sequel and give her another go."

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Don Rickles...: is gay?!?!?!? Didn't see that one coming at all!

Liz Kelly: My guess is he was kidding.

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Did you see...: Your partners in celebrity-ogling, The Reliable Source ladies, reported this morning that Ron Jeremy has been seen around town. Autographing bosoms and so forth.

Or was that Gene?

Liz Kelly: I did. Will have to let Gene know. Apparently Mr. Jeremy has gone high brow -- he was apparently in town to debate porn with an evangelist at UMD. I wonder who won. Why didn't they have classes like that when I was in college?

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Arlington, Va.: My understanding (something I read somewhere)is that Cate Blanchett is preparing for a movie role as a cancer patient hence the weight loss.

Liz Kelly: She is attached to the project "Cancer Vixen" as both star and producer. According to IMDB Pro the project is currently classified as "optioned property" which doesn't sound like "time to start crash dieting" to me.

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Fashion City: What's the buzz about Laura's state dinner dress? I thought it was dreadful -- she looked like she was all hips.

Liz Kelly: The dress -- embroidered turquoise silk faille with a matching embroidered bolero -- was designed specifically for the First Lady by Oscar de la Renta, who assured her that no one else would show up in the same gown (which happened last year following the Kennedy Center Honors, when three other women turned up in the same red number Laura was wearing, forcing her to change).

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Liz Kelly: I'd just like to say that I love Murky Coffee, but there is some kind of of very pungent fruity smell in this place right now and I'm not sure if it's something edible or some kind of bathroom cleaner. All I know is it's giving me a headache.
Just sharing, in case I pass out.

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Arlington, Va.: First, I feel the need to point out that Murky Coffee is a really bad name for a coffeehouse. I say this to my husband every time we pass it, which is at least once a week. Common Grounds was much better.

Second, I definitely think Paris deserves jail. She broke the law and violated her probation. It's a no-brainer for what would happen to us common folks. But a 45-day stint in the local jail is not exactly hard time. It won't be easy, but it won't be that hard either.

Liz Kelly: I like the name. It's kind of off-putting, which I like in a retail venture.
Paris will survive and any stories out there floating around about a prison populace that can't wait to get her on the inside are greatly exaggerated, I'm sure.

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Landover, Md.: Can we start a drive to get Paris Hilton hard time? About a year breaking rocks and digging would be good for her (and the rest of us, who are sick of her).

Liz Kelly: I think the penal code should suit the name. Since her name is Paris, I suggest the French penal code of about 60-some years ago -- which would see Paris shipped to a malaria-ridden tropical island for the duration of her life where she would spend her days fighting off predatory native fauna while chipping lichens off trees and her nights deflecting the unwanted advances of her fellow inmates. If she were lucky, she'd get 17 years in solitary and would be able to spend the years losing herself to insanity. At some point, she'd attempt to swim off the island, only to be devoured by sharks.
I would take great delight in contemplating the contents of her "plan."
Or, I could just read "Papillon" again.

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Re: Blanchett: I think the reasons she looked so scary in that photo were the lighting and the angle. The lights washed her out, and was the photographer on the ground or something? What an odd picture. Granted, she is pretty skinny. She looked fantastic in Notes on a Scandal, but every once and awhile you got a glimpse of just how tiny she is.

Liz Kelly: Agreed. I have a devil of a time with lighting and angle myself.

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Liz Kelly: The "Lost" questions are rapidly stacking up here in the queue as the celebrity questions dwindle. If I don't get some kind of vapid starlet-related questions soon, I'm going to talk "Lost" early.

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Fairfax, Va.: Ron Jeremy did the same discussion at UMD in 2003.

Listserve

Liz Kelly: Well, in that case, maybe he'll do it again. Who knew that Ron was on the rubber chicken circuit?
Okay, that just sounds wrong.

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Get a TiVo!: Yes! Lost early, please! Screw the DVD-waiters.

Liz Kelly: You are evil.

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Slammer!: Hi, Wow, Paris Hilton coming through and admitting she shouldn't get special treatment. I couldn't understand why, when someone is in the public eye, they wouldn't take more precautions than the rest of us do.

This isn't some Simple Life Hoax? Will we see Nicole Richie visiting her in jail with a nail file?

Liz Kelly: Oh to be a fly on the wall of that prison. I wish this was fodder for "The Simple Life," but I'm afraid we'll have to limit our exposure to Paris's prison phase to some kind of special interview with Dateline/The View/Oprah/insert touching "news" show here.

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Baltimore, Md.: You mentioned in last week's chat that your father wanted to name you Belle. Did he realize that being named Belle Kelly would have limited your career options to being a saloon owner in an old Western town --or perhaps a female outlaw, a al Belle Starr?

Liz Kelly: I think that's exactly what he wanted me to be. He was on a Louis Lamour or Bret Harte jag at the time. Amazing how a guy who grew up in south Philadelphia had pretensions to cowboy-hood.
I also think Belle Kelly would've been a good burlesque name, no? "ONE NIGHT ONLY: Dita Von Teese and Belle Kelly."

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Baltimore, Md.: Given how Brit and Lindsay have quickly returned to their partying ways after going through rehab, I hope they will find it instructive that the head of HBO, who just resigned, said that he had been sober through AA for 13 years, then two years ago decided he could drink again. That decision culminated in him losing his fabulous job for allegedly assaulting a female companion in Vegas following the De La Hoya/Mayweather fight.

I do hope the rehabbin' young'uns learn from this.

washingtonpost.com: HBO chief ousted following arrest, allegations (Reuters, May 10)

Liz Kelly: Agreed. That's really a sad case. I believe it was Variety this morning that was fretting about HBO's fate without Albrecht -- mastermind apparently of HBO's original programming -- at the helm.
What a jackhole, tho.

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Re: LiLo on Letterman: She didn't say she was licensed to practice law in seven states -- Letterman said it as part of a "comedy" (sorry, but the air quotes are necessary) bit listing "interesting facts" about LiLo.

Liz Kelly: Although I don't have it handy now, there's a link in this morning's Mix to video of LL's Letterman appearance. Maybe Rocci can find and link.

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Washington, D.C.: Liz, a few years ago while I was still in college at Virginia Tech (go Hokies!), Ron Jeremy came to debate some fake feminist woman about pornography. He won.

Liz Kelly: Okay, when I was at Tech, we got some kind of lame-o hypnotist and the Allman Brothers. I went to both and enjoyed them, but still, that ain't no Ron Jeremy.
We also had the Jim Rose Circus Sideshow. That was durn neat.

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Anonymous: One celeb blog keeps talking about how Britney's youngest boy is never out in public with her. Where is she?! Is she playing favorites? Parent Trap remake with K-Fed?

Liz Kelly: Honestly, I think that the "mysterious Jayden James" thing is a total non-story. He's around. He's an infant. He's hardly ready to party with her.

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Belle Kelly is good: But the ultimate stripper name is:

Precious Little

Liz Kelly: Nice.

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Hey!: Maybe some of us don't even watch Lost and want to chat about other things.

Liz Kelly: Like stripper names, perchance? What's yours?

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Falls Church, Va.: Okay, now I'm just posting a question to avoid moving into "Lost" territory, since I don't watch. Have you ever done a list of "movies with famous stars before they become famous" or can you recommend any? Part of my celebrity-obsession is trying to get these kinds of glimpses ...

Liz Kelly: Hmmm, well, we did something kinda like that -- a list of stars who appeared in horror flicks before they were stars. Let me see if I can find it.
Yep. Here tis.

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Pittsburgh, Pa.: Was I the only one who was surprised to learn that the singer Robin Thicke's father was Alan Thicke from the 80's series Growing Pains? I feel old.

Liz Kelly: I think you were. He's the spitting image of pops. But, I'm sorry, his music makes me want to hurl.

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washingtonpost.com: Lindsay Lohan at Letterman (Just Jared)

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Paris Hilton: Isn't there some deserted island somewhere to which she can be exiled for crimes against humanity? (Devouring by sharks would, of course, be a bonus)

Liz Kelly: I think she should be sentence to a lifetime of being a barfly at some random Sandals resort.

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Philadelphia, Pa.: So, what Hollywood career was Kirk Cameron risking by going on Nightline and proving that he's an idiot? Hadn't he pretty much disappeared anyway? Or is it just that the Nightline appearance made it definite he's not going to be asked to Growing Pains: whatever reunion we're up to now?

Liz Kelly: I missed that, but I'm annoyed because Kirk's people were in touch with me about a month ago about doing a little interview. I'm no Nightline, but still -- we're talking Kirk Cameron here.

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Richmond, Va.: Dave Barry came and gave a speech when I was at UVA. I win.

Liz Kelly: Okay, maybe.

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Hedgehog, IVA: Ron Jeremy made an on-air appearance on WJFK, "The Junkies" show, at around 8 a.m. For the king of porn, he really seems to be a likable and funny guy.

Liz Kelly: Oh sure, you love him for his mind.

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Liz Kelly: I kid.

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Ride 'em Cowgirl?: I think you just (unironically) used the phrase "That was durn neat." Either your dad was right about your career options, or you're channeling the spirit of a grizzled prospector.

Liz Kelly: Or I watched a recorded episode of "Intervention" last night in which a wheelchair-bound crackhead kept saying "daggum." Seriously.

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Calgary, Canada: I don't have a stripper name, but if ever I write a Harlequin romance, my nom-de-plume will be Margaret Anderson. Sounds so stolidly ladylike and British, doesn't it? But she writes bodice-rippers!

Liz Kelly: Let me ask you ladies a question re: bodice rippers. The covers always feature a shirtless Fabio-esque guy striking some kind of manly pose. Do those covers really work?
I thought about this in Weingarten's chat the other day when the topic of women not checking out guys' behinds came up. If we aren't wired to check out behinds, why do we want beefcake on the cover of soft porn books?

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Evangeline La La Land: Evangiline Lily, while somewhat hottish, is not the sharpest knife in the drawer.

Discuss.

Liz Kelly: Agreed. Nor is her character, Kate, who is rapidly becoming my least favorite Lostie.

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Richmond, Va.: While not technically a horror movie, "Once Bitten" stars Jim Carrey pre-In Living Color.

P.S. -- I think one of your field agents in that column is the sister of a guy I had a crush on in high school.

Liz Kelly: Really... interesting. Who? Who? I won't share.

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Tempe, Ariz.: Liz, I think you should just do a separate Lost chat. I mean, I am a Lost fanatic, and I really only read the first three-quarters of the chat as a way to kill time until you talk about Lost, and I know that a ton of others who read this chat couldn't give a - - - - about Lost. An hour-long Lost chat would be bliss, though it would be awful for my Thursday work productivity. Thoughts?

Liz Kelly: With only two episodes left in the season, I think we may have missed the opportunity. But, I think I'll see if we can do a separate hour just about the Lost finale in two weeks.

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Hokie, Land: To Richmond: You'll never win, you went to UVa.

Liz Kelly: Do we really want to do this now, here?

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Non-Lost/Celebrity Sighting Question: I was driving north on Wisconsin Avenue on Saturday, and could have sworn I saw Henry Rollins waiting to cross the street just north of the Social Safeway. Other than hometown roots, any idea why he was in town? Also, what a strange place to see him!

Liz Kelly: Henry passes through town often -- he's got friends here and, I believe, still owns a partial stake in the Black Cat. I know he was skedded to be on the East Coast sometime around now for a show in New York, so maybe he made a little detour to kick around the old 'hood.
I'll pop him an e-mail and ask.

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Sunny, Calif.: Re: Previous post: Chris Albrecht did not "resign" from his HBO job ... Time Warner fired him, not to be nitpicky. Chris apparently thought that after a few weeks, this would all blow over and he'd return to work. Parent Company thought otherwise.

Liz Kelly: Thanks for clarifying that.

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Intervention: Are you a fan of the show? It really is like a train wreck -- I can't stop watching and of all reality shows, I find it the most honest and heart wrenching.

Liz Kelly: I love the show.
But then my favorite show in the whole world is "Cops." Just never gets old.
Seriously, though, they don't get old -- whereas "I Love New York 2" and "Celebrity Fit Club" are starting to wear pretty thin with me.

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Washington DC: Re Margaret Anderson for a writer's name: Wasn't that the name of Jane Wyatt's character on the 50s sitcom Father Knows Best? I know the last name was Anderson (and she was married to Robert Young, as Jim Anderson).

Liz Kelly: I think it was... can someone confirm?
BTW, Robert Young (despite FTB) was a fabulous actor. Love some of his old noir work.

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Smokey, Fla.: When I was at Penn (no, not Penn State) we had Jimi Hendrix and, separately, Janis Joplin. I admit I'm showing some serious age here, but we're talkin' Hendrix and Joplin, people.

Liz Kelly: Okay, you win -- unless there's someone out there who's just waiting to trot out John Lennon, Jim Morrison and Gandhi.

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Washington, D.C. Hokie, again: Oh yeah? We had Bob Dylan my freshman year. Hokies win this round.

Liz Kelly: I saw Dylan there, too. In the field house building -- I think that's what it was called. The thingy with the flying buttresses (which, some other time, I'll tell you about how I climbed them).

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Ideal nom-de-plume: Page Turner.

Liz Kelly: Nice.

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Bodice-rippers: Those covers must work for some women, but they sure don't do a thing for me. I feel the same about the Chippendales. I'm just embarrassed for those guys. It seems like a man's idea of what a woman would like: "Hey, let's put the MEN in tiny garments vaguely suggestive of some bizarre sexual fantasy ... great idea!"

Liz Kelly: Same. It is really mind boggling that this has gone on for decades.

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Stripper names: We all know the technique to find your own personal adult entertainment name, right? First name is your childhood pet, last name is the street you grew up on.

Mine is Phoebe Prince. But Belle Kelly is hard to beat.

Liz Kelly: Ya, mine would be Ann Across, which just sounds like a librarian (not that there's anything wrong with that).

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Bodice rippers: Actually, I make it a point these days to pick covers that don't have that sort of thing on it. I have bodice ripper angst.

Liz Kelly: Thank you for sharing.

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Liz Kelly: Five minutes till Lost time...

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Stripper names: I recall that Johnny Carson always thought a good stripper name would be Kitty Litter.

Liz Kelly: That's so corny, yet funny at the same time. Just like Johnny. Sniff sniff.

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No, I win!: I went to a small state school in Pa., and we had Kurt Vonnegut. It was about 10 yrs ago. Awesome.

Liz Kelly: Kewl.

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Murky Coffee update: How's the smell now?

Liz Kelly: Seems to have eased off a bit, thank god.

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Ann?: You had a pet named Ann?

What, there were too many "Fluffy"s on the street already?

Liz Kelly: My bad. I was using the alternate middle name + street you grew up on formula.
I always default to that because "Scruffy" just doesn't have a nice ring to it.

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Male/Female strippers: Maybe this is fodder for a Gene poll but I think most women who have seen male strippers, me included, did so more for the camp value. I found it hysterical -- not sexy!

Liz Kelly: I would be embarrassed, I think.

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Fashion City: "... designed specifically for the First Lady by Oscar de la Renta, who assured her that no one else would show up in the same gown ..."

Liz, sweetie, no one else would want to show up in a dress that made them look that bad!

Liz Kelly: Ouch.

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Taffy Panorama: Kinda spectacular for a stripper name, don't you think?

Liz Kelly: Oooh, nice. Taffy Panorama's signature number would be danced to "What's New Pussycat."

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Liz Kelly: Okay, Lost time. Spoilers ahead -- and we'll continue to talk about other stuff, too.

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Lost: Wasn't the "sheriff" on the island with the cages and labs named Annie?

Liz Kelly: Nice try, but that was Isabel.

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Lost in Chicago: I'm asking this early so I don't forget it. My latest theory is the "hostiles" are the remnants of the slave ship that wrecked on the island. If you look at the frames of Jacob, it looks like he's wearing a 19th century coat with a frilly shirt (very pirate looking if you ask me). Combine all of that with the fountain of youth theory and it starts to make some sense (not much, but nothing ever seems to on this show). Thoughts?

Liz Kelly: Now THAT is a theory. Maybe the final episode will somehow tie the Lost mythology in with the premiere of "Pirates of the Caribbean 3," which opens two days after the season finale. Jacob is Davy Jones!
Seriously, though, that is a good theory. I may run that one by Jen before next week's show.

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Bodice Rippers: I love a good trashy romance novel as much as the next gal, but I refuse to buy them if they've got the Fabio-esque covers. I just can't bring myself to do it.

I once saw Fabio in person at Tyson's Corner. He was hawking something at Hecht's.

Liz Kelly: "Hawking something?"
What, like a loogie?

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The young Matt Damon ... : ... as a minor teenaged relative in the notorious dinner-table scene near the end of "Mystic Pizza."

Liz Kelly: Interesting. I like that movie. Makes a good double-feature with Justine Bateman's "Satisfaction" -- which actually includes Liam Neeson in his cheesiest role ever.

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Alexandria, Va.: Is it just me, or does Jacob from last night's Lost (in the brief seconds we could actually see him) appear to look like Dennis Hopper with a steak on his head?

Liz Kelly: That is totally what I thought -- well, the Dennnis Hopper part, not so much the steak part.

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My stripper name is...: Tiffany Hillendale. Good?

Liz Kelly: Are you from Woodbridge?

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Horror beginnings: Adrian Pasdar of Heroes appeared in 1987 film called Near Dark. He was a young man who reluctantly joins a traveling "family" of evil vampires. Hilarity ensues.

Liz Kelly: I'll have to watch. I'm a big fan of hilarity ensuing.

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Liz Kelly: By the way, Mr. Liz rented "Tuff Turf" for the weekend. I'm kind of scared.

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Stripper name/Vonnegut: A twofer:

Stripper name: Smokey Cherry

(no lie)

and Vonnegut spoke at my college commencement ceremony.

Liz Kelly: Did he get to meet Smokey Cherry?

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Frederick, Md.: I read both you and Jen agree that Locke is a popular character on Lost ... am I the only one who thinks he is the most annoying person ever and detracts from the show? I found myself HOPING he dies so we don't have any more of the most ridiculously unrealistic behavior ever. I have to say he is what really ruins the show for me, him and Ben, although I think Ben is critical to the plot, which makes him a little more acceptable...

Liz Kelly: Well, you may be. Anyone else want to weigh in?
Locke was one of my favorite characters until this season when he seemed to lose his way somewhat. And I really started disliking him passionately last week when he used Sawyer so terribly.

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Louisville, Ky.: I saw Bob Dylan at Appalachian State (N.C.) two or three years ago. He could barely stand or walk, much less play or sing. Dave Matthews and Tim Reynolds, or Nickel Creek, or Béla Fleck and the Flecktones, now that's some seriously good music. I think App wins.

Liz Kelly: I was honored to see The Lyres perform at Tech, but that probably means something to about 3.4 people out there.

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WM Grad: Wrong. Jon Stewart gave the commencement speech the year I graduated. WM wins.

Liz Kelly: An Ivy League education and Jon Stewart? That's so not fair. I think the young leading minds at WM would benefit from having a NASCAR driver speak at next year's ceremony.
This gives me a good idea for an upcoming post, though -- I'll have to do a little digging to see what celebs are speaking where this year.

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Las Vegas, Nev.: Why is Manassas considered "Americas Most Livable Community"?

Liz Kelly: Well, you've definitely got me with that one!

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Manassas, Va.: Lost brought it strong last night. Cannot wait for the next episode. I wonder if Locke will dramatically appear in the last episode to save the Losties (think Theoden at Minas Tirith).

Liz Kelly: If I followed your suggestion and thought Theoden at Minas Tirith or, followed Doc Jensen's suggestion and thought the Emperor from "Star Wars," I will have surrendered to a level of geekdom to which I'm not comfortable admitting just yet.
I would also keep an eye out for Danielle and her dynamite to suddenly turn up in that episode.

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Ben's Dad ...: It's no wonder Ben is a little off: his dad is Uncle Rico! Perhaps the Others are trying to develop a new herbal breast augmentation supplement.

Liz Kelly: I know. As soon as Mr. Liz and I put together the fact that Roger Linus was actually Uncle Rico, we looked at each other and said "this is a killer episode" and resolved to re-rent "Napoleon Dynamite" this weekend.

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Falls Church, Va.: The biggest names we got at my college were Brandford Marsalis and Arlo Guthrie. That's what I get for going to a school in the middle of cornfields.

Liz Kelly: It really is interesting -- the brisk business done by hasbeen celeb and musicians on the college circuit. Kids bound in by miles of rural landscape will submit to just about any kind of torture.

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Lexington, Ky.: Re: Father Knows Best

from imdb.com

Robert Young ... James 'Jim' Anderson

Jane Wyatt ... Margaret Anderson

Billy Gray ... James 'Bud' Anderson, Jr.

Elinor Donahue ... Betty 'Princess'

Lauren Chapin ... Kathleen 'Kathy' 'Kitten' Anderson

Liz Kelly: Thanks Kitten.

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New York, N.Y.: Carson had a better one with his old girlfriend from high school Gina Statutori.

Liz Kelly: Cha-ching.

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Re: Belle Kelly: Actually, one of the first authors to write a Western novel was Owen Wister, who wrote The Virginian. He was from the Philadelphia area.

And no, I have no idea why I know that.

Liz Kelly: Thank you, that adds nicely to today's randomness.

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Mid-Missouri: My theory on Jacob is that he is the embodiment of Ben's "other personality." When Ben reached the island, he was called a quiet kid. Maybe he had a split personality, and "Ben" that we know became the dominant personality when he betrayed Dharma. "Jacob," then, is his "quieter" side. Crazy.

The moments when Ben was talking to an empty chair, then all h-e-double-hockey-sticks broke loose in the cabin were some of the creepiest on TV in recent memory.

Liz Kelly: That's one theory. Though that wouldn't account for the 11 frames of someone actually sitting in that chair. See today's Lost analysis post for a link to those frames.

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Ithaca, N.Y.: I think I have you all beat with Vonnegut! He was a graduate of my college so he used to come back to speak nearly every year. And Bill Nye (also an alum) taught one of my Astronomy classes last year!

Liz Kelly: Let me get this straight -- you're claiming Bill Nye?

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Washington, D.C.: I'm as rabid an anti-fan as can be when it comes to people who are famous for nothing at all, but I think general population prison for Paris may be unduly harsh.

There was an article in the NYT last week about pay-to-stay jails, where non-violent offenders could pay $100 per day to stay in a safer, cleaner jail. This finances the other overcrowded jails, and actually makes things easier on guards and such. The judge has said that Paris is not allowed such an alternative.

If I were in Paris's stilettos, I'd definitely go for one of those. General population scares me, and I doubt they'll be nice to her.

Liz Kelly: Unfortunately the judge said that option will not be available to Paris. Though she is appealing the sentence, so maybe there will be a chance after all.

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Henry Rollins DC sighting:

Checked Henry's site and yes indeed he was in town this weekend.

Sigh, I never spot anyone cool in town!

Liz Kelly: Thank you!
I love Henry. If Henry was on the cover of a bodice ripper in his little black t-shirt and flat front pants, I'd buy every copy.

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Roger Linus was also....: Lazlo Holifeld, the resident of Val Kilmer's closet in "Real Genius."

Liz Kelly: OH MY GOD!!!! OH MY GOD!!! Wow. You are so right. I did not make that connection but so can't wait to casually drop that on Jen and Mr. Liz. I'll give credit where due, of course.

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Which one do you like better?: We moved a lot so I am either Ginger VanCott or Ginger Hammond. I can never decide.

Liz Kelly: Ginger is good. Ginger Zing?

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washingtonpost.com: "Lost" Dueling Analyses: The Man Behind the Curtain

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Washington, D.C.: So, in last night's episode, we learned more about the purge and the fate of the original(?) dharma initiative ... what implications does this have for Des and the ex-CIA guy in the hatch? Were they in there before the purge? After? What about their predecessor that died ... I think his name ended with a "ski" ...

Liz Kelly: Good questions, all. I think the producers have a bit more work to do in filling out the Dharmas' back story -- why were they pressing the button in the original hatch? What's with that magnetic force?
And why was Ben's father tasked to cart cases of beer around the island?

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Washington, D.C. : ... but originally from Boston. Did you just make a reference to the Lyres, who recorded one of my favorite songs ever ("I Want to Help You Ann")?

You just made me smile. (BTW, if you watch "Rescue Me," the song accompanies that great scene with Dennis Leary, a bottle of booze, some Rufies and Viagra)

Liz Kelly: Yep, them Lyres. I worked on the club committee when they came to play at Tech. Since they were one of my favorite bands at the time, I was pretty star struck -- until Jeff Connolly refused to play until someone found him a hair dryer. And even then it was pretty amazing to see them live.
I think my favorite song of theirs might be "Not Looking Back," though there are so many good ones.
I'm so excited that you wrote in. I'll have to check out "Rescue Me."

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Arlington, Va.: WM is not ivy league. But Emory had Bill Clinton and Adam Sandler when I was there in the mid-90s.

Liz Kelly: Trust me, to a Tech grad, WM may as well be an Ivy.

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re: Mystic Pizza: I went to junior high school with the girl who played the waitress who gave Julia Roberts a ride home after that dinner. As far as I know, it was her only movie.

P.S. Check out Fast Times at Ridgemont High -- some of them made it big after that movie while others disappeared ...

Liz Kelly: Totally, that movie has lots of folks -- including Forest Whitaker.

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New York, N.Y.: My mom is friend's with Henry Rollins' mom. They both worked at the National Gallery of Art. He's nice Jewish boy. Like me.

Liz Kelly: Henry loves his mommy. Only more reason to love him. This is devolving into a gush-fest. I am going to sign off.
Again, apologies for no Friday List tomorrow, but we'll come back strong next week. Instead, stay tuned for the illuminating interview with the author of "Tabloid Prodigy."
Also, no chat next week as I'll be en route to Jacksonville for a little family business. I may see if Jen can use this hour to talk "Lost."
Cheers.
Also, think about this -- would it be worth it to make an iTunes Celebritology iMix?

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