Station Break

Heard or seen something on the pop culture landscape that appalled/delighted/enlightened you? Of course you have. That's what Station Break with Paul Farhi is here for. Local stations, cable, radio shows, commercials, pop culture -- they're all fair game.

Farhi was online Tuesday, June 19, at 1 p.m. ET.

Farhi is a reporter in the Post's Style section, writing about media and popular culture. He's been watching TV and listening to the radio since "The Monkees" were in first run and Adam West was a star. Born in Brooklyn and raised in Los Angeles, Farhi had brief stints in the movie business (as an usher at the Picwood Theater), and in the auto industry (rental-car lot guy) before devoting himself fulltime to word processing. His car has 15 radio pre-sets and his cable system has 500 channels. He vows to use all of them for good instead of evil.

A transcript follows.

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Paul Farhi: Greetings all, and welcome back...So, I was all set to do mop-up on your residual theories, reactions and resentments toward "The Sopranos" finale (me, I liked) when this morning:

June 19 (Bloomberg) -- Daniel Snyder, owner of the Washington Redskins football team, agreed to buy Dick Clark Productions Inc. for $175 million, adding a library of live music shows including "American Bandstand."

....DCP also produces the "American Music Awards," "Academy of Country Music Awards" and co-produces "So You Think You Can Dance," in its third season on News Corp.'s Fox Network.

For some reason, this seems odd to me. Is it the personalities--Dick Clark and Dan Snyder? Or maybe a culture clash--football and non-sports shows? Anyway, I wonder what this deal might eventually produce. "Six Flags over American Bandstand?" "New Year's Rockin' Redskins Eve"?

As always, your suggestions welcome. Let's go to the phones...

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Boston, Mass.: I just saw a rerun of "All the Presidents Men." Has Bob Woodward ever discussed what a pleasant stretch it was to have Robert Redford play his role? I would like to have Matthew McConnaughey play me if they ever made a movie out of my life (our six-pack stomachs are very similar).

Paul Farhi: Great movie. What people fail to appreciate--or maybe they do, but it just makes me feel superior to say "what people fail to appreciate is..."--is how "ATPM" created the myth that Woodward and Bernstein ran Nixon out of office. Not exactly. As detailed on the very fine NPR program "On the Media" this past weekend, it was far more complicated than that, involving other reporters, federal prosecutors, a judge or two, a Democratic Congress and, of course, John Dean....

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Herndon, Va.: Mr. F: I hope the Station Break singers and dancers are getting plenty of water on this hot, hot day. Any news of a shakeup in Washington Post Radio? Things are pretty bad when its best rated show -- Tony Kornheiser's -- has its host on board for a little more than half of the year.

Paul Farhi: The Station Break Dancers are currently meeting with Mr. Daniel Snyder, hoping to land the weekly one-hour variety show that they so richly deserve...As for WaPoRadiO, the ratings needle has gradually begun to move in a positive direction. But Tony helped a lot. I would say it's going to be tougher going without him (how's that for a nice, safe, don't-upset-the-bosses answer?).

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Walnu TS: Man I liked that Sopranos ending ... anyway you look at it.

Just sayin' ...

Paul Farhi: Me, too. What part of ambiguity don't you people understand?

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Montgomery Village, Md.: Paul

Any idea how much , if anything, periodic, but regular guests on radio programs like Mr Tony's receive in compensation? People who appear once or twice a week like Feinstein, David Dupree, etc.

Thanks

Paul Farhi: No idea. My guess, however, is zero. They very likely do it because of longstanding friendships with Mr. K. Just a guess.

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Herndon, Va.: Hi Paul: Anything that distracts Snyder from sticking his meddling hands into Redskins football operations is fine with me. Let him focus on business and leave the team to the experts.

Paul Farhi: Not gonna happen, I'm sure. Say what you will about the man, but he's a very "hands-on" owner. Again, say what you will, but he loves the team, and wants to win really badly.

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Waldorf, Md.: How do you think that Caveman sitcom thing on ABC will do? I think it'll bust, it was okay for commercials, but not for a TV series.

Paul Farhi: I like the concept--caveman family dealing with modern-day prejudice against, um, Neanderthals. Depending on its timeslot and competition, I think it could be a moderate hit. It also depends on the writing. It's kind of classic sitcom material, really. Fish outta water. Think 10,000 other sitcoms, from "The Beverly Hillbillies" to "The Osbournes."

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Alexandria, Va.: The Lewis Bros. are in the process of selling their Winchester and Fredericksburg stations for about $37 million, and now Bonneville is selling 104.1 to Radio One for $38 million.

WBQB and WINC both seem to have better D.C. coverage, plus top ratings in their respective markets. It seems like either the people buying the Lewis stations got a great bargain or Radio One overpaid. Which is it?

Paul Farhi: Interesting. It's clear that slightly out-of-market stations can do just fine in the big city. Look at WFRE, country-music station in Frederick and/or WBJC, the public classical station in Baltimore. Both do pretty well in the Washington area (and don't even get me started with the big-signaled Balmore stations like 98 Rock, which are essentially Washington stations)...Even more than you want to know about the Radio One-Bonneville deal: Didn't Dan Snyder cut a preliminary deal to buy 104.1/103.9 in December '05 for $48 mill? Seems he did, but reneged when he was ridiculed for "overpaying." Guess he realized he was.

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Athens, Ga.: Any idea if Imus is going to resurface. I read a distressing blog that said he and Rosie O'Donnell might team up for a Fix talk show. Say it isn't so!

Paul Farhi: It ain't so.

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Washington, D.C.: Lisa de Moreas said that the first episode of the cavemen show was the worst thing she's ever seen ...

Paul Farhi: Well, I defer to her because I haven't seen it. I'm just talking concept here. Execution remains to be seen...

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Washington, D.C.: This Sopranos ending has got me thinking that everything I learned in lit class was wrong. How much better would Hamlet have been if we didn't know that Hamlet dies at the end? Same with Romeo and Juliet! What if there had been some ambiguity. Do they die? Do they not die? That English hack was just doing the readers' work for them. I just wish Shakespeare had lived long enough to take a few lessons from David Chase! Doesn't he know life is supposed to be open-ended?

Paul Farhi: Aw, go on. "The Sopranos" ending has inspired about 10 million watercooler discussions, 60 million Internet theories, and some very cool and fun YouTube mash-ups/alternative videos. Wouldn't have happened if Chase had pulled a hugs-and-kisses bye-bye (or guns and death) a la "Friends," or some other standard-issue TV show.

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Re: Caveman Show: Early buzz is not good. Critics have skewered it like nothing I've seen since Magic Johnson had a talk show. Commercials said to be infinitely better written ...

Paul Farhi: Roger that. Sigh. It coulda been a contender...

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Washington, D.C.: A new nominee for the Worst. Commercial. Ever. award: the new McDonald's Filet 'o "Fish" sandwich. I didn't think anything could be worse than the actual sandwich. I was wrong.

Paul Farhi: Haven't seen it, but I gotta say, McDons hasn't had a home run commercial in about 10,000 years. You youngsters out there, let me tell you: McDonald's used to kick it freestyle (note to self: Is that a phrase the kidz still use?) in the ad department. Let me see hands on those who fondly remember, "You Deserve a Break Today"...

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Arlington, Va.: So, in the wake of Snyder's purchase including New Year's Rockin' Eve, how many "drop the ball" comments have you gotten?

Paul Farhi: Hahahaha!

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Metro Center, Washington, D.C.: I'd really love to see some pictures of WTOP's "Ledo Pizza Glass-Enclosed Nerve Center." If you or any readers have any, could you please link to them? Each day I grow curiouser and curiouser ...

Paul Farhi: Me, too. Preferably with the reporters and announcers in awkward or embarrassing poses...

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Dick's Deal: I've been to a couple of American Bandstand Cafes in Texas and I think Georgia. Memorabilia, big salads, chicken wings, you know. Maybe Snyder wants to branch out into mall food.

One of them had a Hall and Oates contract from American Bandstand in the early 80's -- they made like $300 for their appearance ... but since they didn't actually sing, that's not bad.

Paul Farhi: I saw one of them joints on, I think, a Pennsylvania Turnpike rest stop a few weeks ago. It was several cuts above the Roy Rogers-Sbarro-Burger King-penny crushing machine nature of rest stop food/entertainment. Kind of a hipper Cracker Barrel, I guess, or a more low-rent Hard Rock Cafe. Anyway, seemed okay, given the alternatives.

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Washington, D.C.: I read earlier today that Snyder's purchase of Dick Clark Productions DIDN'T include New Year's Rockin' Eve, because Dick Clark kept it when he originally sold DCP a few years back. True?

Paul Farhi: You're ahead of me here. Could be. I saw one wire story on the deal. And as much as I think Dick Clark is an American legend/icon, he might want to give up the hosting duties on that show. It just seems like a weird vanity trip at this point.

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Re: The Caveman Show: I predict it will be a hit ... after all According to Jim is finally off the air this fall, that show's fans will need some new-found drivel to keep them occupied.

Paul Farhi: You never know. "According to Jim" ran for, what, six years? Could not have been blander or more generic or less distinguished if it were "Suddenly, Susan" or "Two and a Half Men." So, there's room for lots of crumminess out there.

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Macon, Ga.: Where are NBC and CBS getting some of their anchors and other newspeople from? I could select better on-air talent. Dave Price on CBS on the Early Show. Why? I heard that Moonves loves him (I researched it because I am baffled). Then there is that totally generic group on NBC Today show. They keep hiring really ordinary late 20's/early 30's women that are so dull. It is not about their looks. I am female -- I don't care about that -- they are just ordinary and I don't know why they were able to break out of the Kansas City or Omaha market and go national. Who let that happen?

Paul Farhi: I don't get it particularly. But the first rules of TV news anchoring seem to be 1) look attractive; 2) seem reasonably, but not threateningly, intelligent. The people you're describing fit those criteria, I think...

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Castle Elsinore:"What part of ambiguity don't you guys understand?"

How 'bout the part where merely "ending" something doesn't equal a "conclusion." Sure, you can have endings without conclusions, but this wasn't supposed to be just the ending, it was supposed to be the CONCLUSION of the series. Unfortunately, nothing concluded.

To use an analogy: if Hamlet had ended with the Danish Prince, Gertrude and Claudius, just sitting silently around a banquet table, then a fade to black, would anybody be saying that Shakespeare is a freaking genius for helping the audience understand how the situation was so unsettling and tense that it explains how Hamlet would be so troubled as to have visions of his dead father? Or worse yet, applauded The Bard for "being ambiguous." I didn't think so.

Paul Farhi: Man, I love this chat. We've get feisty debates about "The Caveman" sitcom AND "Hamlet" going simultaneously. The Internets are a beautiful thing...

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Arlington, Va.: Now there's a phrase you don't see all too often: "a more low-rent Hard Rock Cafe."

Paul Farhi: Haha! Okay, let's flip it around: The Hard Rock Cafe is a more upscale Cracker Barrel.

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Speaking of the Sopranos ending ...: Have you seen Hilary's new campaign video announcing her campaign song? It's truly amazing. Check it out: Hillary for President

Paul Farhi: I will, but only after this chat. The rest of you will remain in your seats until dismissed.

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Washington, D.C.: Hamlet dies?

sigh ...

Paul Farhi: Yes. Remember the knave in the Member's Only jacket, in the final scene?...Yep.

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RE: Hamlet vs Soprano: The previous writer was suggesting that Shakes coulda done better if he had not provided such a definitive ending in some of his works but instead left some ambiguity for the audience to discuss over a tankard or two.

Paul Farhi: Right. Imagine the Internet buzz back in Bill's time if he had. The traffic would have crashed the servers.

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RE: McDonalds: Sigh. Oh, Paul. It went like this:

Big Mac, Filet O' Fish

Quarter Pounder, French Fries

Icey Cokes, Thick Shakes

Sundaes and Apple Pies

And the Fork ran away with the Spoon! (Yeah!)

I'm 35 and remember this like it was yesterday. One of my favorites.

Paul Farhi: Y'know, I don't remember that. Not at all. And I think I lived through that. Maybe it's all the brainular interference from the "special sauce-lettuce-cheese-on-a-sesame-seed-bun" Big Mac jingle...

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Membersonlyjack ET: Was he the last member?

Paul Farhi: Hahaha. What's the deal with that? I once owned a MO jacket...in 1982. Don't mob guys update their wardrobes every 20 or so years?

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Sopranos: I didn't hate the Sopranos' ending. But I didn't love it, either. I'm sure David Chase thought he was being clever. However, it appeared to me as if he was copping out -- like he didn't want to write a substantive ending to the Sopranos' story that might be criticized afterwards as not up to the quality of the series as a whole -- like the last Seinfeld episode was. Personally, I think one of the best endings ever was Newhart's -- but it helped that it was a comedy, so it only had to be clever.

What do you think was the most satisfying ending to a dramatic TV series?

Paul Farhi: Frankly, I don't remember many of them. M*A*S*H, of course. Seinfeld, of course. Friends, natch. But perhaps we're putting too much emphasis on the last episode. Most shows don't GET a finale; they're cancelled before they can produce one. As for the Sopranos, I didn't really need a big windup where everything is resolved. That wasn't really the tone of the show. And the "finale', such as it was, was in keeping with the tone of the show.

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Alexandria, Va.: Paul, have you heard the radio ads re: gasoline use? They're basically saying screw conservation and the environment, use more gas! Horrible, horrible ads.

Paul Farhi: Who's running those? Even the oil companies have started to embrace moderation, or even a quasi-environmental message (BP's campaign is especially startling).

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Germantown, Md.: Could you explain why WTOP says its call letters so often.

It seems to me that a news station that never seems to have enough time to tell the whole story would be better served if they didn't waste five minutes every hour saying WTOP Newstime 1:39, WTOP Newstime 1:40, WTOP Reporting for WTOP at WTOP Newstime 1:41. It drives me nuts sometimes.

Paul Farhi: Frankly, it's not meant for you, really. It's meant for the people filling out Arbitron's rating diaries. The reminders reinforce the station ID when it comes time to write down what you listened to. Or THINK you listened to.

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Hollywood: Early returns on "Caveman" are that it's, well, terrible. The first mistake was in thinking it would work as a sitcom in the first place. The second mistake was NOT casting the very talented actors from the commercials -- the very people who made the whole thing work overall. The third mistake is bad writing, acting, direction and stories. It likely won't last the full season.

Paul Farhi: Well, I'm not saying anything, but there's often a huge gap between what "insiders" and critics think and what the public thinks. I mean, do you think critics loved "The Beverly Hillbillies" or "Gilligan's Island"? Unlikely.

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McDonald's: True enough about the Mickey D ads, but for overall weirdness you will never top the Burger King ads -- you know, the ones with the creepy King with the frozen outsized head, peering in windows and showing up in people's beds. I ordered a home security system after those things started running.

Paul Farhi: Those ARE creepy--and completely mesmerizing. I love the voiceover on 'em, too...

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Clarksburg, Md.: I've been thinking, and I believe that in addition to the Station Break Dancers, you need a theme song. I nominate "Left Of The Dial", by our good friends The Replacements.

That's all I got.

Paul Farhi: The window is open. If Hillary can do it, we can, too...

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Fairfax, Va.: Paul,

What's the latest news in TV personalities? Who's leaving, who's moving to another network?

I still think Lindsay Czarniak is the absolute worst in sports broadcasting. Not to mention needing a serious redo of that hair.

Paul Farhi: I like her. Nice to look at, lots of energy, not hammed-up presentation. Sports reporting/highlights are such a diminishing TV news staple--the weather is the big thing now--but she does a fine job.

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Washington, D.C.: Anchors have to seem reasonably intelligent? I guess you don't watch CNN middays. Every time there is a story about, say, science or anything that requires a three-digit IQ, the bozos behind the desk seem to delight in giggling that this is so HARD and that they failed 8th grade math. Very sadly, this is especially true of the women, and because the audience in that daypart is mostly women it does not send a very good message.

Paul Farhi: Okay. They USED to have to seem reasonably intelligent, which required not much more than just knowing when to shut up. Happy talk is actually sort of hard to pull off; most anchors kind of come off dumb while doing it. Message to anchors: Please practice your spontaneous comments more!

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RE: McDonalds Jingle: Here is a YouTube link for the "Big Mac, Filet O' Fish ..." commercial:

McDonald's

You Deserve a Station Break Today...

Paul Farhi: Our new slogan! Or at least, TODAY's new slogan.

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Sopranos Ending: While I didn't mind the ambivalence, I must admit it crossed my mind that a "commercial" decision was made and a brilliant one at that. If enough money comes along Chase can do a movie even if Gandolfini refuses.

Paul Farhi: Won't happen. I just think Chase has some integrity, and when he says "That's it," he means it. And he's said "That's it."

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Olney, Md.: Hi, Paul--I very much enjoy your chats (although I've been away for awhile)...

The "Ramsey Lewis Show" replaced the local-based "Fernando Carlos" on WJZW's AM drive this morning. Is this the first sign of changes to old ABC Radio stations now that Citadel has finally bought them? Is Jack Diamond soon to be off the airwaves at last, and/or are other changes in the offing? Thanks.

Paul Farhi: I don't know for sure, but I don't think so. Citadel just close on the ABC station deal. While they may have been eyeing changes while the deal was in the works, I'd think they'd want to get their hands on the place before rearranging the furniture.

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Re: WMAL: Is WMAL still an "ABC Radio Station" as it continues to say each hour? Did it just lose it's connection to Disney or all of ABC?

Paul Farhi: Yes (see previous post), but I think the ABC tag is going to stay around for a while. I was just talking to an ABC syndication guy; I asked him if he's now a Citadel syndication guy. He said yes, then called me a few minutes later and said they're still using the ABC thing.

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Lindsay Czarniak: I like her too. Just last week, Jim Vance made her blush on camera.

Plus, she's NOT George Michael.

Paul Farhi: Very perceptive observation!

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NOT Hammed Up?: Lindsay Cz is too hammed up. She delivers the same stale-style that George Michael did and her banter is terrible. Plus, she's not exactly the brightest bulb in the box.

Paul Farhi: Well, she seems reasonably bright to me. And how exactly would you measure intelligence in this arena? Not understanding who won and who lost? Reversing the scores? (Reminds me of George Carlin's sportscaster character Biff Barf, with the "Sportlight Spotlight...And here's a partial score: Stanford 10."

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Re: Chase's integrity: Paul, didn't you throw out a similar scenario (i.e., future movie) a few weeks back in this chat? Or am I dreaming?

Paul Farhi: You're dreaming, but can we have permission to film it. Would make a great flashback sequence for the forthcoming "Station Break: The Movie."

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Burbank, Calif.: It's interesting that some huge companies -- Ford, GM, McDonald's, Coke, Burger King, Domino's, IBM, Federal Express, Pepsi -- haven't really produced an above-average commercial in years. It seems that the bigger the company, the worse the commercials are. And, yes, a bunch of us who feel this way are well aware of the plastic king thing commercials from Burger King -- but, really, just as many people roll their eyes and change the channel when those horrible things come on. They literally do not work for a lot of people. They've actually caused some people to stop going to Burger King --really.

Paul Farhi: Having covered advertising on and off for some years, I know this is a constant refrain among the "creative" types--that the larger the company, the worse/safer/more boring the ads. My experience is that I am surprised when I see something exciting from one of these companies. But consider this: McDonald's, Coke, BK, FedEx and Pepsi USED to have the best ads around, consistently. Not sure what the heck happened...

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Alexandria, Va.: Those gasoline ads are being run by the Alliance for Automobile Manufacturers. They're fighting Congress' attempt to boost fuel economy in cars for the 1st time since 1975.

Paul Farhi: Ah. Very interesting. Kind of playing against the prevailing winds, aren't they?

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"Station Break: The Movie": So who plays you? Are your abs sufficiently six-packed that we can get Matthew McConaughey?

Paul Farhi: In a casting coup, my abs will be played by John "Six Minute Abs" Basdow's abs. Other body parts to be cast later.

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Re: Macon, Ga.: The News Disaster Recovery Act of 1962 requires each station to have at least one attractive, nonthreatening anchor for each gender. This is in case of nuclear attack, so each news station has a breeding pair of anchors in the studio bunker. When the radiation clears, there will be a new generation of perky, blow-dried, face-lifted broadcasters ready to take command of the airwaves ...

Paul Farhi: Hahaha...Thank god Congress, or maybe the National Association of Broadcasters, was so forward thinking in passing that legislation.

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McDonald's Ads: They used to kick it freestyle because Barry Manilow used to write them.

Paul Farhi: Right. And to bring this discussion full circle, he also wrote the American Bandstand theme...

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But consider this: McDonald's, Coke, BK, FedEx and Pepsi USED to have the best ads around, consistently. Not sure what the heck happened...: Paul,

It's perfectly obvious. The world has gotten too PC. Everyone's worried about offending someone.

Paul Farhi: Possibly. But there was nothing particularly offensive about their older, really good stuff. Maybe it's hard to keep capturing lightning in that particular bottle...

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Station Break Theme Song:"Zoo Station" by U2.

Paul Farhi: Don't know the song, but I like the title...

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Washington, Va.: So Hillary picks a Celine Dion song? Is she intent on only receiving votes from women at this point?

Paul Farhi: Yes. And Celine is Canadian. This is so out-sourcing...

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Dundalk, Md.: What does it say about me that I like Filets o' Fish and According to Jim? Do I even want to know the answer?

Paul Farhi: It means you're a good solid American, is what it means! And I bet you'll like Hillary's new theme song, too, by another great American, Celine Dion! Rock on, y'all...

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American Bandstand Theme: Barry Manilow did not write the theme. He wrote words to go with it, which he then recorded and used in his act.

Paul Farhi: D'oh!..I thought that was the case, but thought Barry might just be old enough to have written the whole enchilada.

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Beltsville, Md.: The Caveman in modern times was done as a sitcom in the '60s. "It's About Time" started with astronauts traveling back to live among the cave men. Later, got back to there own time, but some cavemen went back with them.

Paul Farhi: True. I remember the show. Not that funny, frankly...

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Anonymous: Two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions, on a sesame seed bun!

Paul Farhi: Did Barry Manilow write that one, too? Or maybe Celine Dion?

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Paul Farhi: Folks, thanks for coming 'round, but now I've got to convey the impression that I'm pretending to work. Or, as I fondly call it, "work." A programming note: We do this sort of thing every two weeks. God willing, we'll all be back in two weeks. Until then, here's a little Barry Manilow to keep you swingin'....Regards to all...Paul.

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