Washington Post Magazine: Mr. Chair Man

An Ordinary Joe in the Seats of Power

In this self-important VIP town, an ordinary Joe decided it was time for the little guy to take a seat of power.

Washington Post Magazine contributor T.M. Shine was online Monday, October 20 to discuss his story, "Mr. Chair Man."

Shine is a frequent contributor to the Magazine. His most recent article, Terminated, was about his experiences as a downsized employee.

A transcript follows.

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T.M. Shine: Hey, I don't want this chair hunt to end. Once the new administration is in I'm taking another shot at the Oval office. And there's no reason to restrict this to Washington, right? I could go after CEOs. What kind of intergalactic chair has Steve Jobs got in his office? I saw this chair the astronomer sits in at the Harvard observatory that is unreal. And a friend told me I have to try and sit in Santa's sleigh before they pull it out of the hangar for the Macy's Thanksgiving Day parade. What other chairs should I be going after? Along with your questions, I'm taking suggestions

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Fairfax: Terry.... I'm one of your biggest fans. What are you up to lately? You haven't really updated your blog much. Let us know how you're doing.

T.M. Shine: As you can see, I've been extremely busy. Oh, and I got a new bicycle.

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Excuse me: Have you got nothing better to do with your time?

T.M. Shine: I know what you mean. After I wrote the unemployment story I thought I'd go right to doing a piece called 'the death of the middle class' but we needed to get the chair hunt behind us first. If you read it again I think you'll see it's a true American adventure story.

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Washington, D.C.: So does this give you a whole new respect for interior decorators or what? And what kind of chair do you think President Obama or President McCain should be looking for in a few months?

T.M. Shine: I was told that the new president can keep the chair in the Oval office or order a new one. I like the idea that one of the first things the new president does is go through a chair catalog. As far as interior designing goes I think every room should start with a throne.

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Boston, Mass.: Maybe I'm stupid, but ... the photos are Photoshopped, right?

T.M. Shine: You are not stupid. You are so smart. The magic is by the great photo illustrator Randy Mays.

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Washington DC: When I was in high school, a friend was an intern in a Senate office. One day - I think it was the summer of 1988 - he took me into both the House and Senate chamber. In the House, he invited me to sit in the Speaker's chair. I nervously asked, "Are you sure it's OK?" and then gingerly sat in the chair for a few seconds. He then took his turn and vigorously twirled around in the seat. I guess they've gotten a little stricter in the last 20 years.

T.M. Shine: People tell me 9/11 changed everything. I love that people used to have the run of the place. and you know some Senator is still sneaking women in to show off and having sex on those sacred Senate seats. The only place I was completely unwelcome was the White House. And the idea that the Senate shop wouldn't allow me in seemed ridiculous. I be they'd let Ken Burns in.

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Washington, D.C.: What inspired this story? And what do you think was the hardest part?

T.M. Shine: I was inspired by seeing local politicians in these big puffy chairs. It seems like the smaller the municipality the bigger the chair. The hardest part - and probably the most fun - was just asking that question: "I want to sit in your chair." And getting such weird reactions.

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Arlington, VA: Great article - you should go for the chair of the "countdown voice" for the space-shuttle missions. Talk about power!

T.M. Shine: I'll add that to my list. Someone suggested yesterday that I try to sit in Suri's stroller. That would definitely be tougher than the White House.

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Philadelphia: Too bad this "ordinary Joe" isn't a plumber, he could probably go anywhere he wants. Can one, and if so, how does one get permission to sit on the lap at the Lincoln Memorial?

T.M. Shine: Now that the government is broke they're going to be more open to doing things like charging $7.50 to have your photo taken on Lincoln's lap Santa Claus-style.

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Washington, D.C.: Several years back my sister was a very junior staffer at CBS News. I went up to visit her one weekend, arriving late Friday night as she was almost alone in the newsroom updating contact info for their various foreign correspondents. She waved toward Dan Rather's anchor chair but would not let me sit in, touch or even approach it. Apparently the man was very particular about his chair...

T.M. Shine: I had hoped to get on the Daily Show to talk about the chair hunt and I would have had to try and get Jon Stewart to offer me his seat. I think he wold have jumped right up.

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Anonymous: This was an idiotic article and even moreso for the Post to make it the cover story for the Sunday magazine.

T.M. Shine: I know. But it makes a great souvenir for me.

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Silver Spring, Md.: Having once worked for a publication that specialized in fluffy/gossipy stories about D.C. officials, I can say that anyone in politics is extremely skeptical when you mention you want comment/information for a story with a silly theme. Can't say I blame them ... sure feels like a set-up to me. But it makes stunts like this one hard to pull off.

T.M. Shine: True, but the idea is really harmless so I found it odd when there was such resistance. As one curator put it, 'you should have to jump through hoops' and I found jumping through those hoops to be a lot of fun if there was a payoff. I was holding my breath all the way to the secretary of defense's chair because I really couldn't believe it. And Sen. Bayh's staff was great fun. They really got a kick out of the whole premise.

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washingtonpost.com: The control room chair at XM Satellite Radio here in D.C. famously looks like the deck of the Starship Enterprise. It looks likely now that post-merger XM may not be around here in DC much longer, so come check it out while you can!

T.M. Shine: I want to actually get in the original Capt. Kirk seat. You know it's just sitting in some garage in West LA. Unless Bill Gates bought it.

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washingtonpost.com: Hi Terry - Elizabeth, your chat producer here. As I told you the other day, I had more luck with these chairs as a kid in the 70s and 80s. My dad worked on the Hill and my sisters and I used to play "courtroom" in Congressional hearing rooms, push each other around in wheeled office chairs in the Rayburn Building halls, and ride the Members' subway to the Capitol. I think security is so much tighter now that staffers' kids probably don't get to do the same. If there are any Hill staffers out there who know otherwise, let us know!

T.M. Shine: Yeah, you make it sound like this great playground. And I loved the idea of the one Senate worker skateboarding through the halls on that 1859 flooring.

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D.C.: You hear anything from the Senate staffers you "conspired" with? Wonder how they liked the story.

T.M. Shine: I haven't heard from them yet but Eric Kleiman over there is a great guy and Sen. Bayh even played along saying his twins want the rules changed so they can sit in his chair.

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Arlington, VA: 9/11 did indeed change everything. When I clerked on the Hill in the summer of 1973, we literally had the run of the place, including all the nooks and crannies in the Capitol's basement. You would've been in heaven: there were storerooms chock full of chairs -- Senate-chamber chairs, representative's office chairs, ceremonial chairs -- all just begging to be raced through the basement hallways. Which might've happened once or twice.

T.M. Shine: Every year they have the annual 'ice cream fest' day for workers on the Hill but they should also have a 'chair racing day' through the hallways. I bet no one would call in sick that day.

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New York, NY: The article was fun. With everything going on in the country and the tension of the election, it was refreshing to read about someone trying to do something as basic as sitting in some big, puffy chairs.

T.M. Shine: Yeah, I want other people to try it. I had imagined setting up a vendor stand near McPherson Square and selling T-shirts to people exiting the Blue line. "I Sat in Justice Alito's Chair" "I Sat in the Secretary of Defense's Chair" "I Hovered over the Speaker of the House's Chair." But then I realized I'd be the only buyer. The extra-large, low-grade cotton shirts would fit only me. People need to stop in those offices and take a seat.

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Washington, DC: Hey there - interesting fact that Rummy eschewed the chair for a drafting table, preferring to stand. As one who is in meetings all the time, maybe this was Rummy's only time to actually stand? Strange that his staffers followed his lead... and another comment, one of the senior people in my .gov agency uses one of those big bouncy fitballs as a chair. Strengthens the core!

T.M. Shine: I got such a kick out of that. I also liked that there is a duplicate of the speaker of the house chair that they keep in storage and only bring out for Cheney to sit in during the state of the union address. I think it's so fitting that Cheney's chair is a twin that's kept in a closet.

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New York: I'm surprised you hit so many hurdles trying to sit down. I'm sure you had to pass security and your back pockets were checked for pens.... What was the big deal with sitting?

T.M. Shine: It's just like anything else with the government. Any request out of the ordinary and they don't know how to handle it. Any offical's first response is always "No."

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Pentagon cubicle: If 9/11 changed everything, how do you explain the access to SecDef's chair? Esp. since the Pentagon was attacked. I think access is much more on how uptight or insecure the chair owner is than security.

T.M. Shine: The Pentagon is trying to make friends.

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College Park: Your writing seems so stream of consciousness, but it has an underlying impact to it. Is it easy for you to write, or do you labor at it?

T.M. Shine: Oh God, I am a laborer.

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New York, NY: What's next, beds?

T.M. Shine: It is time for my afternoon nap. I'll sign off now. be sure to get up out of your seats (off your asses) and vote. I'll leave you with a quote from H.G. Wells: "Think of armchairs and reading chairs, and dining-room chairs and kitchen chairs, chairs that pass into benches, chairs that cross the boundary and become settees, dentists' chairs, thrones, opera stalls, seats of all sorts, those miraculous fungoid growths that cumber the floor."

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