The List: Morning After Election Day

Hank Stuever
Washington Post Staff Writer
Wednesday, November 5, 2008; 1:00 PM

The Style section staff is greeting the new dawn the only way they know how -- by making a special edition of their entirely inappropriate List. There's nothing like the morning after Election Day for boldly proclaiming what's in and what's out.

And they're open to your suggestions too, so please express yourself and submit your own Ins and Outs about what will be hip and not so hip during a new administration.

Washington Post staff writer Hank Stuever was online Wednesday, Nov. 5, at 1 p.m. ET to keep track all your suggestions.

A transcript follows.


Hank Stuever: Hi everyone. I just fought my way into the Post building on 15th Street -- there is a huge mob out there wanting to buy copies of today's paper as a souvenir. Somehow they are not content to stand at the window and gaze admiringly on our new flat screens in the lobby showing our WaPo Media family of web sites.

In: Newspapers!

Seriously, you could probably get a few bucks for your copy, if you're done with it, if you are cool enough to read the actual paper. Of course, some hipster who looks like Mac Guy could go out there and suggest to this crowd that they could just bookmark a web page and save it for posterity! On their 3g iPhone! If so, I hope they pummel him to death.

Okay! It's new dawn, it's new day as Nina Simone (and others) sang. Send me you Ins and Outs for the Obama age. Whatever the new "let's roll" is, let's do that...


Columbia Heights, D.C.: In: working thru lunch out: drinking thru lunch

In: give peace a chance out: give war a chance

In: work days out: vacation days

Hank Stuever: I am ready to drink through lunch, if you're buying.


Washington, D.C.: I suggest that Michelle Obama immediately hire Robin Givhan as a fashion advisor.

Hank Stuever: I'm no Robin, but, using her language ...

One does wonder what one is thinking when one chooses to adorn oneself in a Black Widow costume four nights after Halloween.


Isabella, Minn.: Was your deadline too early for you to include Al Franken? Would he have been better or worse than Jesse Ventura? (or for that matter, California's Governator?)

Hank Stuever: In: comedian politicians

Out: wrestlers? bodybuilders? hmmmm. keep working ...


Washington, D.C.: In -- change Out -- bills

Hank Stuever: In: Already complaining about all the money flying out of your wallet. (I've been reading some conservative blogs, just to make sure.)


Washington, D.C. -- Dress It Up!: Any remote possibility that the new incoming administration will generally be better attired than the departing Republicans? If I see another mis-matched checked-jacket-and-khakis, I am going to hurl hot coffee at somebody ...

Hank Stuever: Well, it's about change. We'll see a new set of fashion gaffes, I'm sure. But probably not at the top -- last night's dress notwithstanding.

Oh, and also out: Jill Biden's pantsuit last night? What was it? What was it?

Out: Spending too much on clothes.

In: Spending just enough.


Red State Roxy, Tex.: So, what happens to all the McCain/Palin bumper stickers? Do I have to look at them for the next four years or am I entitled to a little razor blade scrapin'?

Hank Stuever: You know, I spent a LOT of time in Texas suburbs in 2006 and 2007 and I was fascinated how many '07 cars had fresh Bush/Cheney '04 stickers on them. True Americans keep a surplus. (Same with the Kerry/Edwards stickers.)

Stuff White People Like, the web site, did a fabulous item on how important bumperstickers are to white people who must, must, must tell you what's right at all times.

I expect to see Nobama stickers in red states the same as I expected to see 1/20/09 stickers in DC.

In: Sore Losing

Out: Sore Winning


Peaches: IN: Chuck E. Cheese OUT: Stetsons

Hank Stuever: No idea, Peaches. No idea.


Yay America: Out: Joe Biden's bad Botox. In: more discreet cosmetic surgery

Hank Stuever: In: New makeup technology to keep up with HDTV era.

Out: pancake, stage makeup


Web Diva: Out: mush mouth IN: vowels

Hank Stuever: Out: Nu-cu-lar


Michelle's dress: Looked better on her than on the model featured on the Narciso Rodriguez z Web site


Hank Stuever: Looked better as a possible costume for Mary Jane in Spider-Man 4.


Buttons: Out: Chuck Norris In: Chuck D

Hank Stuever: Out: Huck n' Chuck

In: .... [someone clever help us out]


Columbia Heights, D.C.: drinking thru lunch:

let me go outside and hawk some $5 newspapers and you got it!

Hank Stuever: We don't even have any newspapers up here in the office. It's sort of spooky harbinger of that day we totally web.


Leesburg, Va.:1- Hillary for DOJ, pending opening on the Supreme Court. 2- Keep Gates. He is a decent and competent man. 3-Don't bring any Bill Clinton's persons in high positions. 4-Involve as many Republicans as you can, obviously if equally qualified as their Democratic equals. 5- I still consider Colin Powell an instrument of Bush-Cheney, who either was fooled by their tricks, or, willfully, albeit reluctantly, went along with them. Either case, not deserves to be rewarded. Had he not given his war speech in the U.N., the world could have been different: safer ? .

Hank Stuever: Wow, Leesburg, you are far too serious for this room, but we welcome you and offer you a beer as soon as we sell some more hard copies.


Temple City, Calif.: I don't think I read anything about Sarah Palin in the List. But are you sad you won't have her to kick around for four years?

-- Hockey Mom for Obama

Hank Stuever: You missed


Which was Trig/Toot but someone around here thinks it's not okay to make fun of babies. I humbly disagree. I love mocking babies.


Springfield, Ore.: Submitting early because I'll be at the shrink (not because of the election, though):

I liked this list better than the New Year's one, maybe because I understood more of it. (I'm old.) But what does the election have to do with Wilco, "Lost" (that's still on?), and "toot" (cocaine in the White House?)

Hank Stuever: It is never too early to bend my ear or shoot me a suggestion for the January 1 List.

Let's catch you up:

Toot is Obama's grandma, who helped raise him. (A moment of silence for Toot, please, and her excellent work.)

Wilco is a Chicago band said to be readying itself for Jan. 20 festivities. Obama Girl is so over.

Lost is coming back in January, when our brains are ready to analyze something besides how the debates went. It will take our full powers of concentration, too, because remember: the WHOLE ISLAND IS GONE. You think it's bad when Circuit City closes....


Buttons, D.C.: IN: O OUT: W

Hank Stuever: Brought to you by Sesame Street.


Off Rampant: How soon before an Obama backlash?

Hank Stuever: Tomorrow?


Peaches: Stetson, where the Bush twins went rouge. Chuck E Cheese, where the Obama girls may have their bday parties.

Hank Stuever: Ah.

I thought the Bush twins troubles began back at Chuy's, in Austin.

I think Jenna has a lot left to tell us, now that she can. Maybe she will. She's an author, you know.


Chi Hoahn: What's next for Palin? I picture her hosting a Pampered Chef party.... or her own daytime talk show.

Hank Stuever: I wonder if she "has her Christmas up" yet.


2nd floor Sidecar: In: Black Market White House Out: Chico's

Hank Stuever: Oh, I love that. Where have you been all my life 2nd Floor Sidecar????


E and 6th Street: Why are creepy crowds in?

Hank Stuever: Well, the item was

Out: Creepy pundits

In: Creepy crowds.

This gets at an earlier draft of an item I was working on that was deemed a little wince-making. I think the focus now (IN) is on who's in the crowd, from a Secret Service standpoint, and not (OUT) the likes of Ann Coulter.


Sidecar, 2nd floor: IN: Dark and Lovely OUT: Ogilvy Home Perm

Hank Stuever: Keep em coming.


Rockville, Md.: So -- any leads on what kind of puppy the new administration is considering? And what about the White House carpets?

Hank Stuever: The whole world is watching.

I say Labradoodle.


Tesuque Pueblo, N.M.: Did you write two lists, just in case, ese? Or would you have simply flipped the in/out if McCain won?

Hank Stuever: I sort of did, yes, but I also played it sort of Garry Trudeau. For the earliest editions, we went with half a List. Then I updated it all night as the obvious became more obvious. But I was ready to flip things from OUT to IN and revamp, if it came to that. I practiced my fancy pageant walkin'.


Tinsel Town, Tex.: My husband and I voted for different candidates. What do we argue about now?

Hank Stuever: You are probably in for a lot of I Told You So in the next few years. Right now, I think (if you voted for Obama) you should make a really big show of demonstrating how open-minded you are, not chanting, not insisting people move to Canada if they don't like it, etc...

Out: Sore Winners.


NW, D.C.: The great thing about babies is they are too young to know they are being mocked...

in: babies out: hockey baby mommas

Hank Stuever: Out: Hockey Moms

In: Lawyer Moms


D.C. proper: In: trophy husbands

out: trophy wives

Hank Stuever: Love this one. Send more!


Hank Stuever: Fresh Outrage -- Breaking News


Today's Post is being reprinted as we speak, available on streets this afternoon, but only the A section and Election section, as a commemorative edition.


An indiginity up with which we should and shall not put.


Sidecar, 2nd floor: IN: Brown Sugar OUT: Leggs

Hank Stuever: Hello.


Faking Work: IN: Pregnant teens, OUT: Promise Rings

Hank Stuever: Out: Abstinence Only

In: Planned Parenthood


NW, D.C.: in: ObamaNation out: Trepidation

Hank Stuever: Clevahhh!


Easton, Md.: Will Keith Olbermann still be in? God, I hope so.

Hank Stuever: No, I don't think so. The Ben Affleck bit on SNL was just the beginning, one hopes, of the end of the love affair between Keith Olbermann and the sound of his own voice. We all know the truth:



Mathis Brothers, D.C.: Out: W -- the film In: -- In eight years, who plays the leads in "O"?

Hank Stuever: Someone we don't know yet. Someone who between now and then will totally transform himself from some other reputation in showbiz (a rapper? Steve Urkel) and will be a mster thespian in 2016. (Or 2012. Don't get too far ahead of yourself, Mathis Bro.) (By the way which one are you? Larry or Not Larry?)


First Puppy: Out: Pricey purebreds. In: Animal-shelter mutts.

Hank Stuever: Yes, this is right. Because of the economy and everything. A good dog is good enough. No designer labels.


NW, D.C.: In: lipstick on a labradoodle

Out: lipstick on a pig

Hank Stuever: Haha. Nice.


Washinigton, D.C.: In: Rachel Maddow

Out: Suze Orman

Hank Stuever: But. Rachel. Can. Afford. To. Have. Some. Of. Her. JACKETS.

Actually, I think Suze needs to stick around. America needs to be told You. Can. Not. Afford. It.

Suze for Treasury?


Columbia Heights D.C.: In: Special Commemorative Editions

Out: New Edition

btw -- where is Bobby Brown these days?

Hank Stuever: This is good!

In: Printing lots and lots of copies the night you're pretty sure history is being made.


Downtown: In: Oprah's endorsement

Out: Oprah

Hank Stuever: Yes, I need some fresh data on the size of Oprah's head today. Miles/circumference, etc.


Arlington, Va.: The Baltimore Sun has already cast the movie: Photo

Hank Stuever: And people say the Baltimore Sun is over and done.

Nunh unh


Pittsburgh, Pa.: In: Michelle Singletary Out: Anna Wintour

Hank Stuever: In: Michelle Singletary

Out: Countrywide, realtors, Santa Claus, etc.


Hank Stuever: Well, this was sorta fun, but I think everyone was out too late driving around in my neighborhood honking their horns. We are sleepy people today.

IN: Having lots of work to do.

OUT: Letting someone else do it.

Thanks for the chat, chatsters. Stay cool!


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