Celebritology Live: Now Mercury Free!

You've Been Served... a Heaping Plate of Gossip

When stars shave their heads, marry (or divorce) inadvisedly, couch-jump, spend countless minutes in jail, commit a fashion faux pas and/or other random acts of ego-inspired inanity, washingtonpost.com Celebritology blogger Liz Kelly is on the job. Every weekday, Liz shares the buzz, offers perspective and provides crucial links to juicy alternate news sources and, of course, takes your reaction in her daily blog.

Join Liz LIVE every Thursday at 2 p.m. ET to gab about the latest celebrity pairings (and splittings), rising stars (and falling ones), and get the scoop on the latest gossip making waves across the Web.

In her pre-celeb obsessed days (as if!), Liz ran washingtonpost.com's Discussions section, where she enjoyed talking to really interesting people -- sometimes even Post reporters -- on the phone. She still produces Pulitzer-prize winner Gene Weingarten's weekly Chatological Humor discussion and serves as co-proprietress of post.com's "Lost" Central.

Celebritology Live Archive

---

Liz Kelly: Afternoon. I'm running a little behind this afternoon, so you'll have to forgive me for the brief intro.

One update to the Piven story -- Jeremy told Diane Sawyer he hadn't eaten fish in five months since being diagnosed with Mercury poisoning, but unless I lost four months somewhere it's only actually been a month since he bowed out of a Broadway show claiming to have mercury poisoning. Curiouser and curiouser. Someone please 'splain.

Just a couple of "Lost"-related items I wanted to point out -- the show returns next "Wednesday," so if you haven't already reviewed last season now is the time. And for you non-"Lost" fans, fear not -- Jen Chaney and I will again be spawning another chat to discuss the show, leaving us this entire hour to devote to celebs (as it should be).

Okay, let's get started...

_______________________

St Louis, MO: What was the deal with Jeremy Piven, Broadway and mercury mentioned on the red carpet at Goldon Globes? Tiki Barber was sort of harsh with him when he said that he'd get back in the game even if doctors said he should sit out.

washingtonpost.com: Insta-Poll: The Curious Case of Jeremy Piven (washingtonpost.com, Jan. 15)

Liz Kelly: For the full scoop on the Piven mercury scare, read the item I posted earlier today (linked above).

At the Globes, Piven compared himself to a pro ball player thusly:

"I don't know if they've ever taken you out of a game or if you've had to kind of stop a season short, but that's basically what the doctors did to me. I could have gone against doctors' orders. I didn't. I'm just grateful to be here to be honest with you."

_______________________

Chelsea preggers?: I just saw a picture of Chelsea Clinton seated behind her mother at the confirmation hearings and I have to ask - is that a "breakfast tummy" or is Chelsea (gasp) pregnant? She certainly does not look svelte. Something's up, methinks.

washingtonpost.com:

Melina Mara -- The Washington Post Photo

Liz Kelly: I honestly can't tell -- even in this larger version she doesn't look unusually bloated to me.

_______________________

Maryland: So sad about Ricardo Montalban! But how could The Washington Post have a photo gallery in memory of him and NOT include a picture of him as Khan?

"From Hell's heart, I stab at thee!"

KHHHAAAAAAAAANNNNNNN!

washingtonpost.com: There were timing and rights issues that would have delayed the gallery too long, but courtesy of star photo editor Troy Witcher (and Paramount Pictures):

Liz Kelly: Satisfied.

And I hope everyone read Hank Stuever's fabulous appreciation of Khan, err Montalban, in today's paper.

_______________________

Richmond, Va.: It's a bit messed up when Paula Abdul spills to Barbara Walters that Fox exploited her and a possibly mentally ill person for "entertainment value" and then backpedals by pretending that, hey, it's okay because she's soooo lucky to have this job.

It's kind of like the shy girl that feels soooo lucky that the most popular boy in school asks her to the prom, and doesn't feel like she has a right to be angry when he humiliates her to his friends.

Liz Kelly: Hmm, I see it as kind of more like the idiotic person in the office who goes around bad-mouthing the company and one's co-workers and then suddenly realizes that her big mouth could actually put her job in jeopardy.

But that's just me.

_______________________

Megan Fox at the Globes - Disingenuous or Sadly Insecure?: Okay the girl will probably never win an Oscar, but she is gorgeous. Why then was she so down on herself? Initially I thought it was the typical "no one liked me in highschool" star prattle you hear on talk shows, but the add-on that she has a "22 inch waist" made me think the poor girl has issues...

Megan Fox: "I'm A Man" (VIDEO)

washingtonpost.com: Let me give you a hint on getting your question through. It helps to mention her:

AP Photo

Liz Kelly: Looks like that video's no longer available, but Fox's comments reek of fishing for compliments, something it seems unusual for someone of her obvious, ummm, talents.

What is the real reason? I dunno. I wouldn't exactly peg her as the brightest person (or star) out there (sorry Paul) and she seems to be trying to create controversy around herself at all times -- talking about her lesbian tendencies, dating strippers, talking about what a wild child she is.

Some have suggested that she's trying to follow Angelina Jolie's path to fame -- the shock and awe route.

_______________________

Any "Golden" gossip at the Globes?: Foremost among my questions -- Are the "True Blood" co-stars Anna Paqun and Stephen Moyer still dating in real life?

Liz Kelly: We've never had official confirmation that the two are truly a couple, though it is generally assumed. And, as far as I can tell, there have been no follow-up split stories.

No wonder those "love" scenes looked so dead on.

No pun intended.

_______________________

Mens Wear Dept, Tysons Corner: Liz, I join the other Lizards in shuddering at your challenge to the Powers that Be by calling this the "last online discussion of the Bush Administration." As Byoolin pointed out, Dick Cheney could still declare martial law. I think you should have hedged by writing "potentially the last online discussion..."

In other matters, have you consulted any pet behaviorists -- either in person on online -- about Andy's nasty habit of biting the hands that feed him?

Liz Kelly: I have a feeling we're safe from Dick, so long as none of us agree to join him on a duck hunting excursion.

As for Andy -- no, I haven't consulted anyone. I think this is just his natural personality. And I should point out that at other times he can be quite cuddly.

Liz Kelly: Doh -- forgot the link: Andy is a Jerk (video)

_______________________

Ordway St., NW - Piven's Comeuppance: The sound of the tepid clapping when Jeremy Piven's name was announced among the nominees was deafening. Do you think his "mercury poisoning" battle will effect his career choices in the immediate future? ("Entourage" aside.)

Liz Kelly: I'm not sure that he has tons of options anyhow. He does have a few upcoming projects in the works -- see his IMDB page -- but both of his last heavily-marketed projects -- 2008's "Rock n' Rolla" and 2006's "Smokin' Aces" -- both left theaters pretty darn quick. Not necessarily the kind of box office returns prospective employers are hoping to see.

Liz Kelly: And, oddly enough, one of my good friends happens to live on Ordway St. I know this is not him, though, so hmm.

_______________________

"I was losing my balance and my memory. The lights were too bright. I couldn't get enough oxygen": I think those are actually the symptoms of not wanting to finish a Broadway play run.

Liz Kelly: Others have suggested it also sounds suspiciously like a hangover.

_______________________

Mickey Rourke: I want to see his new movie and everything, but boy, I will not be drooling over him like I used to.

washingtonpost.com:

AP Photo

Liz Kelly: Oh boy -- more Mickey Rourke. I could go on at length about his rise and fall and rise, but I've already done so twice this week:

Can We Call Mickey Rourke a Comeback Kid Yet?

and

Mickey Rourke Wrestles with Fashion (and Loses)

_______________________

Chelsea Speculation: Hello, she is 30. She's allowed to weigh more than 125 without such ridiculous speculation.

Liz Kelly: Well said.

_______________________

Washington, D.C.: Giving the charitable view, mayhaps Mr. Piven misspoke and meant five weeks? He seemed a little worked up/nervous on the part of that interview I saw this morning.

washingtonpost.com: Sushigate Jeremy Piven Fishes For Redemption With Diane Sawyer (youtube.com)

Liz Kelly: Could be. He did seem to be flubbing his lines somewhat.

_______________________

Atlanta: Isn't Sting supposed to be above coloring his hair and beard? What do you suppose that was all about? Could it be a role?

Liz Kelly: For anyone who missed it, here's the new hirsute sting.

Is he, as was suggested by a commenter earlier this week, channeling Robin Williams or Dennis Miller? Or is it more of a Bono?

Let's hope he cleans himself up before arriving in D.C. for his inaugural festivity duties.

_______________________

epjd: I was talking to some female contract attorneys at an open house and we were discussing dress suits versus pants suits. A guy came up and said he preferred to wear pants. I cracked that some guys could look good in a skirt. Being a good Lizard my mind immediately started wondering which male celebs would look good in a skirt. Any ideas? Yes, the skirts would be flat front unless a kilt (you'll have to live with the fact that kilts look hot on guys but have pleats).

washingtonpost.com: Wow, great late inclusion of the celebrity angle on this one!

Liz Kelly: I'm not particularly a fan of men in skirts -- it all reminds me too much of the booth at Comic-Con selling these.

Though I will say that Ewan McGregor looks somewhat comely in a kilt.

_______________________

Gross celebrity fees - Ugh! : Ugh, ugh, ugh. Tuesday's post on the Big Love actress being paid to host a party made me want to throw up. (Five of my work friends have been fired in the last 3 months and they're still unemployed.) I get that this is the way nightclub promotion works, and in turn it provides work for people who work at the club, but so much money for so little work is unseemly and gross!

Liz Kelly: Oh wait -- you mean the post earlier this week (or was it late last week) about Chloe Sevigny hosting a New Year's party in Miami?

Listen, I hear you, but life just doesn't work that way. Sometimes things aren't fair. Pro athletes get paid millions -- some of them just to sit on the bench, while some other guys wake up at 4 a.m. everyday to pick up our garbage. Or, as you say, struggle with unemployment.

You just can't think about those kinds of unrealistic comparisons. Are our values somewhat out of whack? Maybe a little, but they've been that way a long time.

You know what peeves me? I was talking with E!'s lovely Answer Bitch on the phone yesterday and she was telling me about how even minor TV stars get $20,000 worth of merchandise -- everything from clothes to jewelry to teeth whiteners -- delivered to them every month, completely for free. Meanwhile, I have to risk ruining my good credit to live in the manner to which Paris Hilton has become accustomed.

Where is the justice, I ask you?

_______________________

Houston: "Rock of Love" - have you caught up? I finally did this weekend. Oh. My. God. The first episode is unreal! I watch A LOT of bad TV, but oh my! I am sad that the normal, rocker chick girl is probably not going to last too long with the half naked/fake boob ones, but WOW!

Liz Kelly: Oh geez. Yes. Mr. Liz and I tried to watch the 90-minute season premiere over the weekend. We made it about 30 minutes in before bailing for our "Office" season 3 DVDs.

I didn't think it was possible for them to find skankier girls than we've seen over the past couple of seasons, but the producers have really outdone themselves this time. I love the one who was reading a rap she'd scribbled for Bret on the back of a Genital Herpes information sheet.

Classy with a capital C.

_______________________

Celebritology - takin' it to the streets!: What's the plan for inauguration week - when the celebs are on our turf? Will you be teaming up with the "Reliable Source" squad for wacky celebs-in-D.C. scoop?

Liz Kelly: Forces from both sides of the river -- meaning The Post and post.com -- will be out in force to cover the week's inaugural events and more celeb sightings than you can shake a stick at. Keep your eyes on both The Reliable Source and the Inauguration Watch blog for sightings and look for some video from me next week.

_______________________

Inquiring Minds: Aren't the backers of "Speed the Plow" about to loose their shirts due to Piven having to leave?

Liz Kelly: I'm not sure they're at the point of losing their shirts yet, but box office returns are definitely down. I was looking at numbers earlier and in the early weeks the show was pulling in about $500K a week. Now that figure is closer to $300.

_______________________

Just wonder, IN': ...how drunk would YOU have to be to call Brad Pitt "ugly"?

Liz Kelly: Like clinically dead.

_______________________

Dork, Us: Liz will you be able to get any interviews with any celebs that happen to fly into town for the inauguration next week?

Liz Kelly: I'm going to do my bestest.

_______________________

Piven Piffle: Can I suggest that we simply ignore this odious toad until he returns to his appropriate level in the Hollywood universe -- 12th lead in the next John Cusack flick?

Liz Kelly: From what I've read Piven doesn't even speak to Cusack anymore. Apparently Piven said Cusack was put off by his new-found success.

Defamer did a nice take on it back in 2007.

_______________________

Obama Photos: Okay, I think I'm obsessed. Where can I get Obama paparazzi-esque photos? I'm not talking about the ones that get selected to run in The Post -- I'm talking about a steady stream of photos, a la "Michelle goes for a walk wearing stylish J. Crew clothes. This is the SUV that drives Malia to school. This might be Obama's arm, but we're not really sure." Is there a wire service? A blog? Help a girl out!

Liz Kelly: I would do a flickr search on the word "Obama."

_______________________

Anonymous: Liz,

The Post has a Dr. Fox ( if that is his real name ) chatting about pet care and he suggested physically restraining a cat that bites by holding him down until he "submits". He also said it was okay to give the cat a tap on the nose ! What tomfoolery !

Here is my sound advice : When Andy is feeling peevish and bites you because you are petting him. Stop petting him and ignore him until he seeks your attention. This is sound advice you can trust from the guy with 11 cats !

Liz Kelly: I'm not going to stop Andy from biting me. It's how he shows his love.

And if I tapped Andy on the nose, I would have a bloodied stump at the end of my wrist instead of a hand.

_______________________

Which male celebs would look good in a skirt?: Sean Connery: pic

Liz Kelly: Let's not leave out "Highlander's" ("There can be only one!") Christopher Lambert.

_______________________

Mens Wear Dept, Tysons Corner: Liz, were you able to find a black watch plaid topcoat for Mister Liz?

Liz Kelly: Nope, I never was Mens Wear. I've been meaning to mount a search of vintage stores but just haven't had the time. If only I had a stylist to do this sort of thing for me.

_______________________

Guys in Skirts: Groundskeeper Willie !

Liz Kelly: Make way for Willie!

_______________________

Above the Apple Store: Liz, what did you think of Angie and Brad snubbing Ryan on the red carpet? I'm no fan of Mr. Seacrest but that just seemed snooty and childish. They are movie stars. It is part of their job description to work the red carpet.

Liz Kelly: I agree with you -- their job is to self-promote and passing up the man who has (somehow) become the hottest ticket for celeb interviews seems like a miscalculation on their part.

I'm guessing, though, that this is some kind of retribution for over-reaction to Angie's stony silence while she and Brad were chatted up by Ryan at the 2006 Globes. That incident was explained away as her being upset about her recently deceased mom.

Seacrest himself says he doesn't think Jolie thinks he's important enough for Jolie.

He's no Ann Curry, after all.

_______________________

Virginia Beach, Va.: Another Globes comment: I thought it was truly cruel when Demi Moore came out to present an award and said to her daughter, Rumer Willis (who was "Miss Golden Globes," handing out the awards) something along the lines of, "Rumer, darling, you look lovely and I'm proud of you but remember to stand up straight." Talk about embarrassing your child on national TV. Rumer looked mortified.

Liz Kelly: Aww, I thought it was cute. It's not like she said "I thought I told you to get your teeth whitened." A mom is allowed to take a certain amount of license.

_______________________

Silver Spring, Md.: Hi Liz: Sorry if this was in your blog today...just passing through the chat...on E! News last night they said that George Clooney was in town the other night to celebrate his dad's birthday. Does Nick Clooney live here now? Or was he just visiting? My mom adores him, so if he is living here he might want to ask for a restraining order against a short, pudgy, red-haired woman who answers to the name of Sophie. If she gets word of this, all bets are off...

Liz Kelly: I really hope your mom isn't reading this chat.

And, yes, Clooney Sr. has joined the staff of American University as the "distinguished journalist in residence.

No word on where he's chosen to park himself while in town.

Oh, and here are a few pics of George arriving at Dulles on Tuesday.

_______________________

Cusack : kinda sounds like just as much of a jerk as Piven, actually.

Liz Kelly: Yeah. Maybe they deserve each other, eh?

_______________________

Anonymous: Have you seen "Slumdog Millionaire" and is it as good as all the press it's getting ?

Liz Kelly: Yes and yes.

_______________________

Is he, as was suggested by a commenter earlier this week, channeling Robin Williams or Dennis Miller? Or is it more of a Bono? : Sasquatch.

Liz Kelly: Or the wolfman.

_______________________

Skirted Men: The entire cast of Braveheart.

Liz Kelly: Really? Even that looney Irish guy?

_______________________

Baltimore: RIP Patrick McGoohan: Seeing "The Prisoner" when it first ran on CBS in the late 60s was a defining moment of the era for me--the perfect show at the perfect time.

Reading the obits in various papers (especially in the London Telegraph) showed what an interesting, odd and prickly guy he was. He worked his way up from nothing, had contempt for the show biz lifestyle (he was an ardent Roman Catholic, which may partially explain how he wound up playing a great villain in "Braveheart")and never, in his entire movie career, kissed a woman on screen because he considered it would mean being unfaithful to his wife.

Yet he sent up "The Prisoner" in a 2000 episode of "The Simpsons" in which Homer was banished to a place much like The Village, where he kept screwing up the escape plans of Number 6.

As Number 6 would say, "Be seeing you..."

Liz Kelly: Just putting this out there as is.

_______________________

Maybe they don't warch Idol: I'm not a celeb-apologist but is it possible that Brad and Angie simply did not recognize Seacrest ? I mean do you think those two sit around watching TV like us regular folks ?

Liz Kelly: I'm sure their publicists know who Ryan Seacrest is -- and I doubt they were far from their charges on the red carpet. But Angie and Brad are so A list -- A+ really -- that they can afford to snub a few overeager interviewers here and there.

_______________________

Lost is So, ON: What will your chat schedule next week now that Lost is on Wednesday nights?

I have my seat reserved to watch the premiere on the big screen Wednesday night!

Liz Kelly: I'll be doing the normal Celebritology Live chat at 2 p.m., then joining Jen to host an hour of "Lost" discussion at 3 p.m. -- immediately following this show. My fingers will suffer for you.

And can I just say that Jen and I have both seen the premiere and that it is really good stuff.

_______________________

2009 celebrity death pool: I nominate Amy Winehouse and Jeremy Piven. The latter because if the mercury doesn't kill him, his co-stars will.

Liz Kelly: Ba-da-bump.

_______________________

Princess Deck: I'm going on the New Kids on the Block cruise!!!

Liz Kelly: Wow.

_______________________

Clooney and AU: If George (not Dad) drops by personally, I might consider ponying up some cash for the old alma mater to keep Sr. employed. They haven't been able to shake it loose any other way.

Liz Kelly: I've been thinking it's time to brush up on some of my journalism skills. Maybe it's time to enroll for a few courses. I wonder if there are any schools nearby that offer top-notch a J-school... Hmmm.

_______________________

Philadelphia: Lots of male celebs look good in kilts (real, proper kilts, not the abomination linked to above). Of course, most of them tend to be Scottish or Irish, which could have something to do with it...For anyone worried about the pleats, please note that the pleats are worn on the back side of the kilt, and the front side has flat panels. For good examples, if for whatever reason Ewan McGregor and Sean Connery don't show you well enough what I mean, Gerard Butler, Billy Boyd, John Barrowman, Mel Gibson circa "Braveheart" days, David Tennant and James Doohan have all donned kilts at various times.

Really, it's a style that should be more common.

washingtonpost.com: You have to love "Scotty" as a fashion icon...

Liz Kelly: Well, that tight uniform he wore on the original Trek really did wonders for his figure, too.

_______________________

Jeremy Piven's next role?: Feces-Throwing Monkey on the Loose in Tampa Bay

Liz Kelly: You people are weird.

_______________________

re: Chelsea Speculation: She is 28, for your information. We share the same birthday and I won't be 30 until 2010. Don't rush us!

Liz Kelly: Heaven forbid.

_______________________

Birmingham, Ala.: RE: "I'm sure their publicists know who Ryan Seacrest is -- and I doubt they were far from their charges on the red carpet."

I thought I had read in several mags that Brad and Angie don't have publicists.

washingtonpost.com: Hence their utter lack of exposure.

Liz Kelly: Right. They really are starved for attention.

Don't believe it.

_______________________

re: Lost is So, ON: You promised a Lost free chat!

Liz Kelly: Oh come on -- I mentioned "Lost" twice (well, now three times).

_______________________

LOST book club: go to NPR and listen to the story by the woman who reads every book mentioned on Lost. She had some good points about parallels between the Lost story and Watership Downs. REpiqued my interest in Lost

Liz Kelly: Okay -- umm, that was our very own Jen Chaney.

(Four times).

_______________________

dale blooming: what are the chances of me buying Bono a Guinness while he's in town?

Liz Kelly: I'm guessing slim to none...

_______________________

I saw Piven's play!: For someone with "Broadway in his DNA," he was only okay. Totally eclipsed by his co-star, who was THRILLING and got tremendous applause at the curtain call. Jeremy's reception was much less enthusiastic, and he actually smirked and said,"Is that the best you can do?" Classy!

Yeah, he should really just go away. He's making it worse for himself.

But it is a shame that people aren't going to see "Speed the Plow" without him. William H. Macy really is an upgrade. Come on, everybody! Field trip!

Liz Kelly: Good point.

_______________________

Liz Kelly: Okay, that's it for today.

Join me tomorrow at 2 p.m. when Jen Chaney and I chat about yet another "Lost"-related (that's five) book, Stephen King's "On Writing."

And stay tuned tomorrow morning for a pretty dang fun Friday list.

_______________________

Editor's Note: washingtonpost.com moderators retain editorial control over Discussions and choose the most relevant questions for guests and hosts; guests and hosts can decline to answer questions. washingtonpost.com is not responsible for any content posted by third parties.