On TV

Reality, Non-Reality and Everything In-Between

Columnist Lisa de Moraes was online Friday, Feb. 27 at 1 p.m. ET to take your questions about the drama, comedy and heartbreak of the world of television -- both onscreen and behind-the-scenes.

This week, Lisa looks at Andy Richter returning as Conan's "side-kannouncer" after a failed acting career: Brilliant move, or a little like moving back into your parents' house after college? Also, Jerry Seinfeld creating a reality show about marriage problems, and Barack Obama's Not Quite State of the Union clocking 16 million more viewers than the Oscars.

The transcript follows.

Take this week's poll.

TV columns | On TV discussion transcripts | de Moraes on TV blog.

De Moraes has written "The TV Column" for The Post since 1998. She served as the TV editor for the entertainment industry trade publication the "Hollywood Reporter" for almost a decade.

washingtonpost.com: We're having some technical difficulties, and the chat will begin at 1:15.

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Chattanooga, TN: Andy Richter seems like a nice enough guy, but shouldn't he have given up his champagne dreams and gone to work at his father-in-law's hardware store by now?

Lisa de Moraes: Hi. Sorry for the delay. My brilliant, and apparently overworked, producer went Missing in Action. He's back with us now and for that we are grateful. Now in re Andy Richter, would you go to work at your father-in-law's hardware store when you can get a cushy salary being Conan O'Brien's Definitely Not a Sidekick? Oh wait, is that your version of going back to work at Dad-in-law's hardware store? At any rate, sounds like you are of the Not Getting Andy Richter schoo. Me too. I like Conan better solo...

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Arlington, Va.: Lisa! I love "Dollhouse"! I am sorry I ever doubted Joss Whedon! Now, if only I can trust FOX...

Have you gotten past your initial tank top distaste, and what do you think?

Lisa de Moraes: "Distaste" is the wrong word. I love this show. I am a big fan of craptastic TV and this, pookie, is the very definition of craptastic TV. I'm completely hooked....

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Ad for "Kings" during 30 Rock: So I have no idea what the King or Kings show is about, but seriously I am supposed to believe that the people world would allow themselves to be ruled by someone who chooses that stupid orange and white butterfly flag as his standard? I will not buy it.

Lisa de Moraes: It takes place an an alternate universe -- seriously, NBC says so -- which at the press tour TV critics were thinking would kinda maybe make product-placement deals a problem. You know, like, it's another universe but they use iPods and drive Ford Focus's and how did that happen? But, getting back to the orange and white butterfly flag, I take your point. It's a pretty wimpy flag and I'm surprised a tough guy like Ian McShane would not have insisted they change it to something more, well, king-like. You know, a lion, or a two-headed griffon, or something...I'd call it a verisimilitude problem.

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washingtonpost.com: WAPO TEAM TV STATUS WATCH

RENEWED

Crash (Starz), for a second season

Army Lives (Lifetime), for a fourth season

The Simpsons (Fox), for a 21st and 22nd season

Survivor (CBS), for a 19th and 20th season

America's Next Top Model (CW), for a 13th and 14th season

Smallville (CW), for a ninth season

One Tree Hill (CW), for a seventh season

Supernatural (CW), for a fifth season

Gossip Girl (CW), for a third season

90210 (CW), for a second season

DATE SET

My Boys (TBS), March 31

Law & Order: Criminal Intent (USA), April 19

In Plain Sight (USA), April 19

Scrubs (ABC), May 6

CANCELED

Middleman (ABC Family), after one season

Lisa de Moraes: We are so discombobulated over here at TeamTV today I forgot to post our excellent Status Watch. Here it is. And, we had poll questions which appear to have been fixed. This week's poll asks you to determine which of three very riveting TV moments over the past week is in fact the No. 1 Riveter...

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Washington DC : I know that Entertainment Tonight and Access Hollywood have long ceased being actually about entertainment and Hollywood, but I am literally enraged that every night I see a promo for these shows and it is something about the Octomom, the Octomom's mother, the Octomom's father, the Octomom's whatever. This is the apogee, the apex, the acme of rewarding bad and stupid behavior. What's the best thing to do, other than an impression of Oedipus after he got the bad news? Thanks.

Lisa de Moraes: Ah, but Octomom will soon have her own reality series and then the celebrity suck up shows can say they were just ahead of the curve and she IS about entertaiment programming. And I suggest you do what I do when I become too oppressed by all the Octomom this and Octomom that -- I eat more chocolate. Works every time. That, or, like you said, poke your eyes out. Personally, I like my way better... yes it's fattening, but it's less permanent..

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RE: Kings Flag: It should be smelly and profane.

Lisa de Moraes: Now you're talking -- a scratch-n-sniff flag with a picture of a hooker from the Hollywod Version of the wild west: very pretty, preferrably blonde and buxom, in a corset and precious little else..

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Philadelphia: I noticed when Kath and Kim went to dinner, they went to Applebees, the same place people on Friday Night Lights hang out. Is Applebees the only restaurant in TV land? By mentioning Applebees, may we now get a check from Applebees?

Lisa de Moraes: I'm waiting for the Applebees to show up in the alternate univers of Kings. Now that would be some kind of great TV to see how they could work the chain into the alternate universe. Meanwhile, is anybody besides me not knicker-knotted about the use of iPods on "30 Rock" and other product placement on that show. I kept seeing bloggers and columnist all worked up about it and I just don't get it. It does not bother me at all to see Liz Lemon going to Queens to get back her iPhone that she left in a taxi. I thought last night's episode was hilarious...

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What's your take on the PaleyFest?: Does one get any real insight or scoop at PF or is it all "you're great" no "you're the greatest" Hollywood mutual admiration?

Lisa de Moraes: Once upon a time the Museum of TV & Radio (now the Paley Center which, call me crazy, sounds so much less special) held its TV festival and the greats in this industry would turn out and you'd actually learn something about the industry. Now, it is a total fanzine festival -- not that there is anything wrong with that. All the shows included are shows that are currently on the air, and many of them have had boatloads of similar events to get out the fans. It's fun, it's just no longer special.

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As goes Norman Gentle, so goes the nation...: This guy was ratings gold! They were fools to lose him!

Lisa de Moraes: Wild Card, my friend. Wild Card. (actually, I think if Paula or, more likely, Kara tries to bring him back during Wild Card night, Simon Cowell will smack her over the head with his chair)...

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Bowie, Md.: Although I'm enjoying it, I hear that Dollhouse's ratings have been poor. I'm not even thinking "next season" for it right now -- is Fox likely to air all the available episodes, or yank it early?

Lisa de Moraes: I hope not. Given that they put it on Friday, which is Fox's Saturday. Their expectations have to be seriously low for this show and, don't forget, it is doing better than its leadin, "Sarh Connor" which I'm guessing is a goner...

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American Idol: So I'm beginning to think that Kara chick is more self-absorbed than even Simon is. Does she just like hearing herself talk?

Lisa de Moraes: Hilarious last night when she kept talking at length to the two Idolettes on stage and they were running out of time and Simon tried to get her to stop by saying things -- subtle things -- like "running out of time" and she just kept right on talking until Seacrest finally was able to jump in when she eventually had to pause for breath. Kara clearly does not understand how a TV show is, um, made.

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Speaking of smelly and profane...: How's "Eastbound and down" doing for HBO?

Lisa de Moraes: Very poorly. When even the trade papers can't find something great to say about the HBO ratings, you know it's bad....

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A Reality Show in 2029: Octomom's Spawn v. Jon & Kate's Eight: The Death Match

Lisa de Moraes: Yes, we're all waiting to see where she lands. I'm thinking NBC at 8 p.m. Monday through Friday -- a strip show.Then NBC would only have to program the 9 p.m. hour with expensive scripted series...

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TV watch question: Lisa, my sweet husband LOVES "Crusoe." Is there any hope that it'll come back. I keep telling him that the move to Saturdays was the kiss of death, but I feel so bad for him because he was really into it. So, any hope?

Lisa de Moraes: Alas, not much....

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Washington, DC: Any chance of Nick/Norman getting into the Wild Card show?

Lisa de Moraes: I'm hoping. I want to see Simon hit Kara over the head with a chair. I know, I'm not proud of it, but there you are...

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Pookieville, USA: AI is starting a bad trend by bringing back last year's Loserettes (Tatooed Irish Barmaid, Michael from Oz, Nanny Brooke). Who's next? Horsetrader Kristy Lee Cook? Can Sanjaya be far behind? At least they discarded the Shiny Chrome Tractor Seats of Destiny for something far more elegant...

Lisa de Moraes: I miss the Shiny Chrome Tractor Seats of Destiny! I am not loving the Shiny Stemware Stools of Massive Opportunity. Too sophisticated for me. But that's always what happens. You have this nice little show and then it get to be a hit and then the producers go and make it all slick and over-produced and then we get bored and move on to the next nice little show...

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Product placement: The worst is "Desperate Housewives" where the ladies are always using their Sprint whatever to talk to each other via video. It irritates me and makes me never want to buy the product!

Lisa de Moraes: Yes, that's very ham-handed. Bad writing. "30 Rock" is much better written from PP point of view. I think that's a compliment to Tina Fey, but I'm not sure...

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If anyone knows: Lisa knows. There is a commercial for Yoplait that shows a woman knitting to keep from eating. Yeah, well. But what makes me crazier is how familiar the non-knitting blonde woman in the commercial is. I know she's been on television somewhere and it's making me nuts. With a name I could check IMDB, but what do you do with just an image? Is there a way to find out who's in commercials? I can't be the only one spending way too much time going, "oh! that's...um...wait...I know this...!"

Lisa de Moraes: See this is the problem/advantage of DVR. I have not seen that ad. Anybody else out there who can help?

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Richmond, VA: Any word on how Friday Night Lights is doing? I don't see it in your list of winners or losers.

Lisa de Moraes: Ah -- that's because you don't see any list of winners or losers these days.... Change is good, change is good..

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Kings Alternate Universe. . . : . . . where people watch NBC?

Lisa de Moraes: Exactly. But that brings me to my pet peeve of the day. Why aren't people watching "30 Rock"? Yes I know it's floating out there all alone in the Sea of What the Heck was NBC Thinking, but it is chokingly funny and nobody can claim not to know about it since Tina Fey shows up everywhere. I was surprised she was not asked to participate in President Obama's inauguration ceremony...

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Anonymous: I liked "Life" when it started but now it's just gotten silly. AND the chick who plays his partner is pregnant so Donal Logue is without a girlfriend. Is there any hope this show can find its footing?

Lisa de Moraes: It's on NBC. That's all I can say.

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Dollhouse: So, in lieu of a social life, I've been watching Dollhouse. The main problem I have with Dollhouse, besides the fact that it's just not that good, is that I keep thinking how much better Jennifer Garner played that same role, because Dollhouse is basically Alias with an ugly Freudian overlay, and Eliza Dushku is just a poor man's Jennifer Garner wanna-be. Somehow I don't think the producers (and poor Eliza seems to be one) want me watching Dollhouse and wondering what Jennifer Garner's next project will be and how the new baby is doing.

Lisa de Moraes: You say "ugly Freudian overlay" like it's a bad thing....But yes, I take your point. And agree entirely.

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Super!: Wait, "Smallville" has been picked up for a 9th season?? While I am thoroughly enjoying the current season, I thought everyone was under the assumption that eight was enough and this was going to be the final year.

Lisa de Moraes: Does seem to suggest CW's development for next season isn't that strong, or doesn't exist. Or has 25 cents to work with. or.....

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Product Placement: Carla from Top Chef did a chat on Wednesday and someone asked her if she was bothered by the blatant product placement. She said someone had to pay for the show. Product placement no longer bothers me. Carla changed me.

washingtonpost.com: Speaking of product placement: Top Chef Finalist Carla Hall Dishes on the Competition

Lisa de Moraes: Apparently poor Carla is not aware there are ad breaks in the show that "pay for the show"? Is she from anther country, or Ian McShane's alternate universe?

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30 Rock: I, too, love this show.

Lisa, if you were king of NBC in THIS universe, what would be your strategy to increase viewership of this oh, so worthy program?

Lisa de Moraes: *Strip it at 10?
*Hire someone who can develop good programs with which to surround it?
*Offer it to CBS for its Monday 9:30 p.m. timeslot?
*Run a "30 Rock" episode after the Super Bowl to expose it to about 20 million viewers, instead of some super-lame episode of "The Office"?
*Watch & Win contest?
*Simulcast it on USA, Bravo, Oxygen while it's airing on NBC?

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Logan Circle: Is this shaping up to be the weakest group of Idol finalists or what?? Can't you remember dozens of contestants -- including Tatiana and Jameer -- who are light years better than the final field so far? what's up with that??

Lisa de Moraes: I'm hoping Tatiana comes back in Wild Card but I know it's a futile dream. She acutally has a beautiful voice and there must be so many drugs floating around the offices of Fox that could help her stay more sane and normal during performance nights...

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Nashville, TN: If Ian McShane can have an alternate universe where he is King, can I have my own alternate universe too, where I have a better job and am more sexy?

Lisa de Moraes: Done and done, my friend! (someone told me that is how sales people talk to clients in the internet world, and it's my new favorite phrase)...

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Ugly Betty: The end of the episode last night brought a tear to my eye. Do I need help?

Lisa de Moraes: Golly, I did not watch yet -- had to watch/blog "Idol," and then called it a night. I've only gotten through "30 Rock" and a couple other shows from last night so far this morning. So what did I miss. Someone die? Someone get married? Someone have a baby?

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Re: Product Placement on "30 Rock" : Pookie, it doesn't bother me for two reasons. One, because it's so commonplace now that I just shake my head and move on; why should "30 Rock" be different from any other show? Have you ever notice how long the camera lingers on the fronts of cars on "Desperate Housewives"? We get it, you're sponsored by Lexus. And two, I figure, I'll put up with anything if it means I get my "30 Rock" fix for another season. All that placed ad revenue can't hurt.

Lisa de Moraes: I'm not explaining this right. Mostly I find product placement very annoying. But I think it's done so deftly (that is a word, right?) on "30 Rock" I actually find it amusing and sometimes I don't even notice it....I can't figure out why TV critics got so knicker-knotted over that show's PP when there are so many other shows doing it so badly, like "Desperate Housewives" which does it about as badly as I have ever seen it done on TV, and that's saying a lot...

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Non-Knitting Blonde: If I don't have my commercials mixed up, the non-knitting blonde was in an episode of Seinfeld. She played an employee of Elaine's (at J. Peterman) who was only interested in George when she thought he was dangerous.

Lisa de Moraes: I think we have an answer folks.

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Re: Ugly Betty : No! You don't need help. It was sad. Poor Daniel, in a lot of ways.

Lisa de Moraes: What? Happened? Don't leave me in suspense like this...

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Miami, Fla.: Have they ever had a contestant on "American Idol" who was a ventriloquist and sang through his or her puppet?

Lisa de Moraes: No, pooks, that was on "America's Got Talent." And he was brilliant -- a singing/star-impersonating ventriloquist. But, I'm all for your idea. If Norman Gentle gets to make it to the top 36, surely someone with a good voice who can do the best Sammy Davis Jr. I've ever heard, while keeping his lips shut, deserves a chance on "American Idol."

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Yoplait blonde chick: The "L Word's" Leisha Hailey?

Lisa de Moraes: Is this right? anyone out there?

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Dunmore Rd.: Based on a promo I saw, I thought the whole "Kings" show was a metaphor about David and Goliath. No, huh?

Lisa de Moraes: Yeah, it's pretty hard to miss the metaphor. A Metaphor in a different universe. A product-placement-free universe. With butterfly flags. We all want to go live there.

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Privileged?: I loved the season finale of Privileged! What are its chances for a second season?

Lisa de Moraes: Given that it was practically the ONLY show -- and the only drama besides midseason "Reaper" -- that CW did NOT renew yesterday, I'd say you should not hold your breath on this one. Sorry...

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Silver Spring, MD: I disagree about the producers fearing Nick/Normund. If that were the case, he wouldn't have made the 36. No, they don't want him to win, but they wouldn't mind a bit of a Sanjaya run either.

Lisa de Moraes: That was one pretty short Sanjaya run. And Sanjaya was good for the show because he pulled in the tweener chicks and they are trying to maintain a younger audience on this show -- younger viewers being the first to bail on a reality series. But I'm not sure Norman Gentle was attracting a tweener chick audience....

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DC: What happened to the Osmond kid who was trying out for American Idol? Did he not survive Hollywood?

Lisa de Moraes: He did not survive Hollywood and they never showed us what happened which at first annoyed me. But he said in some interview somewhere that he had some episode related to his MS and lost his singing voice -- something like that -- so I'm chosing to believe they disappeared him without explanation out of sensitivity. Oh wait, this is the show that can't stop milking the fact that Danny Gokey just lost his wife. Sensitivity! What the heck was I thinking?

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Foggy Bottom: I think no one watches "30 Rock" because there are 8 million news stories telling us to watch "30 Rock." NO ONE PUTS BABY IN A CORNER!

Actually, I find it's an acquired taste, and if you just happened to be flipping past it the odds are you wouldn't stop on something hilarious.

Plus, consider that Tina Fey 1) ran "Saturday Night Live" into the ground as head writer, 2) in many public appearances puts out an "I'm smarter than you" vibe and 3) probably angered a chunk of America with the Sarah Palin stuff. There are some marketing difficulties there ...

Lisa de Moraes: So, you are saying if a TV critic tells you a show is great, you are less inclined to watch it? I had always suspected this was going on, but no one's come right out and said it before. Because if people did not watch a show just because the writer had run a previous show into the ground, and had a whole "smarter than you" vibe going on, how do you explain the careers of Joss Whedon, JJ Abrams, McG, and pretty much anyone else you can name who's hot in TV these days? They fit your description perfectly...

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Let my people ramble on: So, I say just let Kara ramble on. It's an hour for goodness sake. So, we get less of Ryan's uncomfortable inappropriate humor, we get Ryan asking fewer stupid questions, actually less of Ryan would probably make the ratings go up. I say we start a writing campaign to Fox to limit Ryan to 200 words per show regardless of if it's a half hour, hour or two-hour show.

Lisa de Moraes: Well, you make an excellent point there...

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Doll House: I don't think you had a chat last week so I wanted to let you know that based on yours and Tom Shale's review of Doll House, I decided to watch the premiere. If I recall correctly, the line that convinced me was "blah blah blah tighter tanktops blah blah blah Elisha Dushka's legs". On that last point and in regards to the white dress she wore in the beginning, at what point is a dress so short that it no longer serves a purpose?

Sincerely,

The target demographic

washingtonpost.com:

Lisa de Moraes: Pookie, in TV industry, the less of a dress there is the more purpose it serves... that's TV101.. but thanks for the clip...

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Washington, DC:

Here's a link to the Yoplait ad on YouTube...

Yoplait Knitter TV COMMERCIAL

Lisa de Moraes: Here is the ad, for those of us who have not caught it..

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Yoplait: Is that Leisha Hailey from L Word?

Lisa de Moraes: Two votes for Leisha...

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Cleveland Park, DC: Lisa, I've just discovered Burn Notice on USA, and it's become one of my new favorite shows. It's entertaining and well thought-out. Is it doing well? Likely to stick around for a while?

Related to that, USA has some good original shows--Psych, Burn Notice, Monk, etc. USA is owned by NBC, right? So if it's already paying for scripted programming, why doesn't NBC put any of those programs on its regular line-up, instead of giving us five hours a week of Jay Leno?

Lisa de Moraes: They tried that but they did cable-like numbers -- I know, surprising, right? NBC's problem is that no one over there seems to be able/know how to develop a hit. Maybe that's what happens when you program for margins..

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Atlanta: Jerry Seinfeld I hardly knew ye! Actually I never knew him but I thought I did and now he's doing a reality show? What's that all about? Does he miss the attention that much?

Lisa de Moraes: Maybe he needs the money? I can't explain it. The guys's an icon and he wants to put his name on some cheesy reality series?

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High School: I have been doing observations at schools this month, in fact I am at one now, thank God for your chat to keep me etertained. Anyway, it has provided me a greater insight as to the Holy Grail of TV sponsers. As a nation and as a serious student of television, we are doomed.

Lisa de Moraes: What is "an observation" and how does it allow you to participate in this chat -- not that I don't love having you join us. I'm delighted you joined us. The doomed part -- you lost me there...

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Silver Spring, Md: How will the Wild Cards work? Do they bring back 12 and we vote? Do they bring back 12 (or more/fewer) and the judges fight over them and name three? Or do they just bring back the three they are adding, with no vote or deliberation?

Lisa de Moraes: The judges bring back some of the lost Idolettes and they get to pick three who will round out the top-12. Meanwhile Ben Stiller is way out in front in this week's poll has having delivered the most riveting TV moment of the past week. I'm inclined to agree, but we will keep the poll up for a while so get out the vote.. Bye.

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