Carolyn Hax: He's not that into her; how clear should he make that?
Adapted from a recent online discussion:
I am having fun with my girlfriend but am well aware she's not marriage material for me. She says she is fine with dating casually for now. I know girls sometimes say this and don't mean it, so what's my responsibility here? To keep reminding her that it's not headed anywhere? That seems like such a buzzkill.
Why is she good enough to date but not good enough to marry?
She's just . . . fine. I like seeing her about twice a week, but have no desire to spend more time around her than I do already. The only real thing we have in common is that we live in the same city and like the same places. I have fun with her when we get together. I don't really think about her when she's not around, and, if I had to choose between her and the freedom to date whoever I want, I'd choose freedom.