The List: what’s out, what’s in as 1980 dawns
The essence of fashion is knowing what's in and what's out. But what good does it do you to come into work one day completely in, wearing brown eyeshadow and pearls, carrying a Judith Krantz novel peeping out of your Enny bag if those unenlightened dweeps you call your co-workers don't appreciate how in you are?
It's impossible to glory in being totally in if nobody around understands what's out.
So, how to insure in-ness?
Read this list.
Memorize this list.
Make 10 copies of this list and send them to 10 people you come in contact with in this life or the next. Have them make 10 copies and send them out similarly. Do not break this chain. It's your only chance. Then, by the time this list reaches you again it will be next year, when it will be time for another list.
|Too-long pants||Pants cropped short|
|Designer sheets||White sheets|
|Funky fetes||Elegant affairs|
|Blue eyeshadow||Brown eyeshadow|
|Dire Straights||The Talking Heads|
|Disco||New rock (New wave)|
|Irving Wallace||Judith Krantz|
|Board games||Electronic games|
|Elvis Costello||The B-52s|
|Canvas Bags||Rip-stop bags|
|Brownish lipstick||Bright pink lipstick|
|Open shirts||Oxford shirts|
|Cowl necks||Crew necks|
|Lime juice||Grapefruit juice|
|All orange shades||All purple tones|
|Third Avenue||Columbus Avenue|
|Matching vests||Sweater vests|
|Velvet dinner jackets||Tuxedos|
|Bland men's wear||Color in men's wear|
|Leather gloves||Cashmere gloves|
|Mixed nuts||Silver almonds|
|Saddle shoes||Dance shoes|
|Jane Pauley||Jessica Savitch|
|Crock pots||Convection ovens|
|Cowboy boots||Timberland boots|
|Poly pajamas||Ski underwear|
|Ceramic pins||Metal pins|
|Francesco Scavullo||Ansel Adams|
|Nylon undies||Cotton undies|
|Wigged mannequins||Bald mannequins|
|Oil furnaces||Wood stoves|