The List
BY HANK STUEVER  |  NOVEMBER 5, 2008

We greet the new dawn the only way we know how -- by making a List. Because we've always believed that we're the change we've been waiting for, and because there's nothing like the morning after Election Day for bold proclamations. The culture wars? (Still in.) Hope? (Very in.) The Bible Belt? (A little too tight.)

Here's what's in: Unreal Americans in the unreal America, which turns out to be anyplace and anyone, dreaming our crazy little dreams, making three-pointers from the outside. It's the return of eloquence, of high grades, of cool under pressure. But before we go into that beckoning light, can we have just a little more fancy pageant walkin' from Miss Congeniality? Please?

 
Chest thumping
Fist bumping
Certitude
Latitude
Invoking six-packs
Opening six-packs
U-S-A
Yes-We-Can
Obama Girl
Wilco
Tenacity
Audacity
Moose
H-O-R-S-E
Todd
Toot
Invited to Jenna's wedding
Invited to Sasha's slumber parties
Remembering Chad
Remembering Joe
Mavericks
Rogues
Closet organizers
Community organizers
Stuff White People Like
Presidents White People Like
Glasses that make you look smart
Cabinet members who make you look smart
Irritating Bill O'Reilly
Irritating Keith Olbermann
Creepy pundits
Creepy crowds
Neocons
Obamacons
O'Doul's
Nicorette
Seeing Russia
Seeing Paris
Orange alerts
Status updates
The South
The South Side
Bridge to Nowhere
Amtrak
Compassionate conservatives
Social Security
Analyzing the debates
Analyzing "Lost"
Mission Accomplished
Mission Impossible
Country First
Millionaires Last

PHOTOS: Courtesy; WEB PRODUCER: Amanda McGrath - washingtonpost.com

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