The Navigator: Geeky . . . and Proud By Linton Weeks Washington Post Staff Writer Thursday, April 9, 1998

(From the GeekGeer web site)

She asked me what he had said.

"I have no idea," I replied.

But, I added cheerfully, "I just spent $2,000 on a new computer."

She asked what it could do.

"I have no idea," I said again.

Over the past couple of decades, I have come to appreciate the ways in which computers enhance certain experiences. And I have been fortunate enough to meet lots and lots of people -- like Roger -- for whom computers are a way of life. Let's call them, with affection, geeks.

Many of us use computers -- sometimes against our wills -- for specific purposes: word processing, financial spreadsheets, graphic design. But the true geeks don't utilize computers, they idolize them. To a geek, a computer is not a means to an end, but the end itself -- the be-all and end-all. Without geeks, we'd have no Web.

The alphageek, of course, is Bill Gates. Some folks loathe Gates; others love him. To the pure geek, however, Gates is a demigod. And many mortals have fashioned shrines to honor their bespectacled deity:

His minions at Microsoft were paid to create the official Bill Gates page. Here you can see Gates move about the earth, wiring the hungry and informing the infirm. You can read his encyclicals, plug into his vision -- you can even e-mail the old billionaire. In case you think he's a one-dimensional guy, you can read about his Other Interests -- how computers relate to biotechnology, how computers relate to art and, for variety, how computers relay to satellites.

The Committee for the Moral Defense of Microsoft, an Ayn-Randy group that believes Gates is being unfairly persecuted by the federal government, has a strait-laced site. Gates sympathizers can sign an online petition. One of the site's creators, Robert W. Tracinski, 29, a writer and editor in Charlottesville, says someone "who creates something like Microsoft shouldn't have to be dragged in front of the courts and punished for his achievement."

Needless to say, there are all sorts of anti-Gates sites. In fact, there is a Web ring known as the Anti-Microsoft Network, which links together hate-minded areas such as Evil Empires ("One down, one to go") and the 13th Floor ("It's time to break them up D.C., just like you did AT&T").

There are gaggles and gaggles of self-proclaimed geeks online. For a peek into geekhood, try these sites:

Geeks.com. This is a quintessential geek site created by Rob Fugina, a programmer in St. Louis. He posts photos of his Jeep and his honeymoon, a list of Star Wars stuff he's collected and an explanation of the automated system that controls the lighting in his home.

GeekGeer. A tongue-in-geek site dedicated to all things geeky. Items for sale include caps, T-shirts and, of course, pocket protectors. The home page will also lead you to similar sites. Here we're reminded that a geek is "an intelligent and respected breed who uses mind over muscle; who champions individuality over blind conformity; and who harnesses the power of technology and knowledge."

But you'd better seek out the geeks soon. As the Web is overtaken by corporations and other commercial enterprises, the geek could go the way of the Kaypro.

Linton Weeks can be reached at weeksl@washpost.com

Click: One day someone arbitrarily decided that the members of the WELL were like the MENSA of the online world. I've always questioned that assessment, and now I know why. These supposedly bright people could have been working out solutions to the world's problems, but instead they were really busy scanning and uploading their first-class snouts to The Nose Pages. If it weren't for the fact that you can add your own proboscis to the page with a simple e-mail, I'd consider it downright snooty. (Or is that snouty?) http://www.well.com/user/cynsa/nosepage.html —Dan Pacheco panchecod@futureforecast.com

Surfing: Perturbations, pleasures and predicaments on the I-way

Taxes & Tax Loopholes
Income taxes got you bamboozled? If you query a search engine about "refusing to pay taxes," several seditious sites pop up. Some advise you to just quit filing, claiming that income taxes are based on voluntary assessment and payment. Other legal theories that would be fascinating to research during a long stretch in the slammer include the notion that there's no authority in the law for the IRS to assess income taxes, according to Inform America!, which professes "to empower America, one concerned citizen at a time." No need to pay income taxes shouts The Light Party of Mill Valley, Calif., which supports clean energy resources aligned with the forces of nature and offers an 800 number for ordering a "Freedom Package" on how to avoid taxes and live as a free American. TaxBusters! discusses supposed loopholes in the tax code, with explanations more circular than the loops. Taking the high ground, Laissez Faire Books claims to offer the world's largest selection of books on liberty and reminds us that Henry David Thoreau did time for refusing to pay state taxes.

Unfortunately, the IRS "What's Hot" site is only a tease. Though the IRS calls it "one cool place to check out the hottest things going on at the IRS," the page invites comment on forms W-8, 8A, 8B and 8C. At Comments and Help, there's a place to e-mail questions, but the IRS warns: "For privacy and security reasons, we do not handle tax account questions so don't tell us who you are or where you live -- only provide your e-mail address."

-- L. Peat O'Neil

Butler in Your Computer
Looked in my closet this morning for something to wear. At this time of year, everything looks boring. Tired of my blouses and scarves, I spot a yellow necktie printed with giraffes. But how would I tie it? I fool with it for a while, then turn to a Web site called Ask Jeeves. I query: How do I tie a necktie? Voila! I am linked to learn2.com and easy instructions with step-by-step diagrams for Windsor, four-in-hand, and bow ties. After a couple of tries, I'm off to work with my giraffe necktie blowing in the breeze. Other tutorials include: shaving your legs, buying sunglasses, diapering a baby, even opening a coconut.

-- Bobbye Pratt