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'Fools Rush In': 'Nuff Said

It could be pointed out that "Fools Rush In," a romantic comedy starring Matthew Perry and Salma Hayek, is a well-intentioned effort to bridge two cultures. After all, this is about the relationship that transpires between Alex Whitman (Matthew Perry), a corporate-minded New Yorker, and Isabel Fuentes (Salma Hayek), a passionate Mexican American.

After these perfect strangers enjoy a one-night stand in Las Vegas, Isabel disappears in the morning. She comes back three months later, pregnant with Alex’s baby, and fully intending to keep the child. Flustered but responsible, Alex does the honorable thing: He weds her in a Vegas chapel, with an Elvis look-alike as a witness.

Are you getting a feel for the "goofiness" at work here?

As the newlyweds do things backward -- get pregnant, get married and then fall in love -- we’re forced to watch an insipid comedy of opposites. Alex, who’s in town to build a nightclub, believes in his career, gourmet hot dogs and people-watching. Isabel, who has deep family roots in the area, believes in destiny, frank talk and solitary canyons.

Then there are the in-laws. His parents (Jill Clayburgh and John Bennett Perry) are uptight Manhattan WASPs who like sailing and don’t tan well. Her folks, led by Isabel’s baseball-wielding (and of course, lovable) Dad (Tomas Milian), bring soul, togetherness and ranchero music to the dinner table. Neither side likes this shotgun-wedding affair.

Perry, who plays Chandler in the TV show "Friends," takes to these innocuous waters like a duck. He’s pure television: cuddly, bumbling, occasionally funny and completely bland. Hayek (the slinky woman in "From Dusk Till Dawn") is appropriately earthy and full of vida -- you know, "ethnic." This isn’t real life. It isn’t even a movie. It’s an extended sitcom. And for the first time in your life, you’ll actually beg for commercials.

FOOLS RUSH IN (PG-13) — Contains sexual situations.