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‘Calendar Girl’

By Peter Gilstrap
Washington Post Staff Writer
September 06, 1993

 


Director:
John Whitesell
Cast:
Jason Priestley;
Gabriel Olds;
Jerry O'Connell
PG-13
Children under 13 should be accompanied by a parent


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One for "Calendar Girl."

The girl in the ticket booth smirks. " 'Calendar Girl'? No problem. There's like 10 people in there." That's it, huh? She makes change, rolls her eyes and smirks again. "Yeah, I wouldn't expect much from Jason Priestley."

Can Priestley (the Jason that doesn't wear a hockey mask) pull off his first starring film role and leave the ticket girl scarfing her words?

One hundred and fifteen minutes later, the answer is no.

Maybe it's not his fault. The lame story has the "Beverly Hills, 90210" pretty boy way back in 1962, where Priestley (as tough-sexy Roy) and his two buddies -- Gabriel Olds as sweet-sensitive Ned and Jerry O'Connell as dopey, peg-legged Scott -- have the hots for Marilyn Monroe. Roy wants to "canoe" her (guess what that means), Ned wants to worship her, and Scott isn't sure just what he wants to do with her.

Yes, it's the Fonz, Richie and Potsie redux. "Happy Days" are here again.

The three "borrow" a Galaxy 500 and split their nowhere-Nevada town for Hollywood in search of Monroe. They engage in a variety of schemes to meet the bombshell, none of which is charming, funny or even makes much sense. They spend a lot of time sitting in the car outside her house, and one night Roy whips out sticks of reefer!

Poor goofballs! They get so stoned they pass out and miss M.M. when she decides to walk her poodle in the middle of the night. Hobbling by in skintight blouse, pink pedal pushers and towering heels, Stephanie Anderson actually does look kind of like Monroe. One of the guys actually does get a date with her (can't tell which one), they return home to Nevada and Marilyn dies. But you knew that.

One can only assume that the producers of this movie are relying on Priestley's army of female fans to turn out for this one (for those so interested, be sure and stay awake for the nude beach scene. No kidding). The actor tries hard, but the numskull script has him beat. Oh, well. Maybe he took the role so he wouldn't have to change his haircut.

   
© Copyright 1999 The Washington Post Company

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