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Miss Manners: I told her she cut me in line and she got angry

3 min

Dear Miss Manners: I went to the drugstore to pick up my prescriptions. There were five people in line at the pharmacy. When I finally got to the counter, a young woman came up behind me and announced to the clerk that she was there for her vaccination and asked where she should go.

The clerk stopped waiting on me and turned to the pharmacist to let him know she had arrived. I turned to her and said, “You know, he was waiting on me.” The young woman proceeded to become belligerent and cussed at me, calling me names. Should I have handled this differently?

Clearly, your reprimand did not warrant being cussed out and name-called. Lines are there for a reason, and there is usually nothing wrong with politely informing those who stray.

Buuuut it sounds like the young woman broke in because she had a prearranged appointment and did not want to wait in the wrong line. Presumably, the clerk only took a moment to redirect her to the pharmacist before returning his attention to you.

This, Miss Manners thinks, warrants some patience on your part. But she will advise future line interlopers to show some awareness: by hovering apologetically as they ask about the correct line, before aggressively cutting it.

Dear Miss Manners: I have two very good friends as houseguests a few times a year. They are both quite overweight.

The last time they stayed with me, they slept in our guest room, which has a pullout sofa. After they left, I noticed that they had bent the bed frame so badly that it couldn’t be bent back into place.

Of course, I did not say anything about it to them, but I have since purchased a new pullout sofa. They are planning to visit soon, and I don’t know what to do about the sleeping arrangements. My husband thinks it’s very strange to offer them our bed, and I think they would find it strange as well. Do I have any other options?

Not really. No doubt, your guests will be keenly aware of why there is a new sofa bed — and fearful of breaking the new one if it is offered. (A note to sofa bed manufacturers: Please make your products more sturdy.) Any awkwardness in suggesting the bed will likely pale in comparison to the prospect of the alternative — or the relief in not having to discuss it. Miss Manners suggests something as simple as, “We’re moving things around a bit. Why don’t you take our room?”

Dear Miss Manners: Do you bring a girlfriend of only three months to a wedding?

Only if she made an indelible impression on the hosts and was invited. Or if the invitation reads “plus one,” in which case Miss Manners is afraid those hosts get what they deserve.

Dear Miss Manners: Is it still considered gauche to wear diamonds, even stud earrings, before evening?

Yes, but you and Miss Manners are the only ones who seem to know it. She therefore would appreciate it if you did not succumb to peer pressure, leaving her alone.

New Miss Manners columns are posted Monday through Saturday on You can send questions to Miss Manners at her website, You can also follow her @RealMissManners.

©2022 by Judith Martin