To avoid using the word "employes," let me inform you that the men and women who work for the Chesapeake & Potomac Telephone Co. have now tallied their gifts to Children Hospital. Mother Bell's children have pushed us past the total collected in last year's campaign.

However, we must be careful not to say they set a "new record" for us. That usage, like "all of the," bothers copy editors, who point out that "record" is sufficient, without the "new." After all, has anybody ever set an old record?

We can't really say enough about the telephone people who respond so magnificently to the hospital's annual need for a currency transfusion, but at least let's try to mention the major units that chipped in, and we'll begin with "Maryland Suburban." It's breakdown is:

Plant Districts: Construction East, $225; Hyattsville, $367; Landover, $305; Lanham C.O. (even I know C.O. stands for Central Office), $33; Special Services, $265.10: Suitland, 394.50; Bethesda, $704; Construction West, $160; Rockville, $427.62; Silver Spring, $352; Wheaton, $295. Total, $3,528.22.

Commercial Department: Montgomery County, $31.25; Prince George's County, $92.80; Business Unit Business Office, $110.32. Total, $234.37.

Marketing: $82.20.

Engineering: C.O. Equipment, $108.45; Customer Equipemnt, $80; Outside Plant Engineering East, $211; Outside Plant Engineering West, $437. Total, $836.45.

Executive: B.S. and M.E., $120; Staff, $94.08; Traffic Facilities, $134. Total, $348.08.

Legal, Security and Forecasting: $14.

Grand total for Maryland Suburban: a plain old record of $5,043.32. Note that this is a whopping 25 per cent increase over last year's Maryland total of $14.035.31.

Next to report in was NORVA, which is C&P's in-house shorthand for Northern Virginia Area. Some of the other jargon used by insiders is also rather easy to decipher - e.g.; "I&R" stands for "Installation and Repair." Other abbreviations may baffle you and me, but C&Pers will know who did what, and that's what counts. Here's the NORVA breakdown:

Arlington I&R, $81; Fairfax I&R, $150; SCC, $165; Building Supplies and ME, $99; Centreville C.O., $15; Fairfax Plant Dispatch & Assignment, $34; NSSC, $76; Test Center & Outside Repair, $95; Alexandria/Arlington South PBX Repair Group, $70; Staff, $100; Executive, $68; McLean I&R, $115; Fairfax C.O. & Braddock Road C.O., $115; Marketing Business Services, $14; Construction, $218; Falls Church Test Center, $97; Pentagon A.F. Command Post & Tactical Switch, $26; Falls Church Residence & Assignment Center, 71.84; Arlington CSOB, $8; Alexandria C.O., $95.50; Falls Church C.O., $68, Supply - Arlington/Alexandria, $50; Traffic Facilities, $50; Herndon Complex Installation, $5; Barcroft Test Cenyer, $462; Arlington II Business Office, $15.27; Alexandria Repair, $38; Inventory Group, $131; Miscellaneous, $67.50.

If our cordless abacus is to be believed, the total for NORVA is $2,600.11, so the total for the two C&P suburban districts is $7,643.43.Inasmuch as we began the day with $157,820.77, the official total in our shoebox is now $165,464.20. But in truth there is more there than meets the eye or fits into today's space. The shoebox really holds $180,735.89 now.

How can this be? Well, if you have been following this accounting closely, you have to doubt noticed the absence of any reference to C&P's Washington district, which is known in-house as "Downtown," The tally on Downtown is also finished, and if there had been enough space to list it today, you'd have found out that Downtown contributed $15,271.69. But as matters stand, you're just going to have to wait until Monday to find out how Downtown pushed us across to an all-time high.

All-time high? That's also pretty silly, isn't it? Who ever heard of a sometime high? It's either a high or it isn't.

Oh, well. Join us on Monday, just to make sure that all the records we set are new ones.