IT'S SUNDAY MORNING and nasty out. You've read the newspapers, the brunch crowd gets on your nerves and you're bored. Don't take a nap. Adventure and a wealth of information are only as far away as your telephone.
If you know the right phone numbers you can learn virtually anything you want to know and many things you probably don't even care about. All you have to be is a good listener. You don't even have to open your mouth because the information comes to you through the growing phenomenon of "This is a recorded message."
The list of available information is endless: what time President Carter had breakfast and with whom, what Congress is doing (with four separate interpretations from Democrats and Republicans in both the House and Senate), how to get a federal government job, the correct time and how many birds of what kind the Audubon Society has seen in your neighborhood.
You can learn more about the weather than you ever cared to know: weather for pilots, weather for boaters; Virginia, Maryland and Delaware extended forecast; temperatures in eastern cities and in western cities. You can also, of course, get the local forecast, which is updated hourly.
If you have children who are climbing the walls, you can learn what's happening at the Smithsonian museums, what's going on in the National Capital Parks system, details of events in local parks. You can find out when Skylab will be visible and what the brightest stars in the sky are. You can also learn what schools are closed because of bad weather, teachers' meetings or holidays.
A C&P spokesman says there is no masterlist of recorded messages because "anyone can have equipment installed that will give a recorded message." Basic charges for installing your own message service are $30 per month for the telephone line regardless of the number of incoming calls, plus a onetime charge of $35 for installing a phone jack.
FEDERAL STATE and local governments rely on recorded message systems "to disseminate standard information easily," according to one federal official. A number of government agencies connect a record message to their telephone after normal business hours. Private business is also entering the field. Appalachian Outfitters in Oakton, Va., who specialize in outdoor equipment, give a recorded canoe and boating forecast in summer and a cross-country ski report in winter on 281-5396. They also have a brief commercial announcement. A number of area churches have Dial-a-Prayer messages listed under "dial" in the white pages.
The U.S. Chamber of Commerce, the Virginia Consumer Protection Agency and the Federal Job Information Center have recorded message systems. You can Dial-a-Regulation from the Federal Register or call the Democratic National Committee to hear a Democratic view of the day's events. The Republican National Committee has no recorded message number - because, according to a spokesman, "it's too expensive."
HERE'S A partial list of recorded messages in this area. If the number doesn't answer, try it again later. They may be changing the message. If you need this kind of information of if you are bored, try one.