First, this word of enlightenment for an election year.
By a resounding 3-to-1 margin, the readers of Family Circle don't want their children to become president because they feel the office has become too corrupt, dishonest and dirty.
The question was popped in the February 19 issue of the magazine; the results are in the current, June 3 issue.
The future salvation of American politics?
"A woman president will make a difference," say the readers. The View From the Bench
And speaking of the political process let's look to the courts for an assessment of American journalistic standards. We find this pronouncement from Judge Joyce Hens Green of the U.S. District Court for the District of Columbia, ruling May 1 on a logo dispute:
Science Digest "is a flashy, up-beat magazine that differs from [The American Association for the Advancement of Science's] Science as Philip Roth novels differ from Shakespeare plays as Bo Derek does from Katharine Hepburn." 10-uous
yand speaking of Bo, how about Bo Magazine volume one of which is now dribbling off the counters of Seven-Elevens, supermarkets, drug stores and other merchants of necessities. Would you believe there is enough to say about Bo to fill 68 pages? (There are a lot of pictures.) Weight, There's More
And speaking of 10's, how about lesser numbers, and BBW Magazine -- Big Beautiful Woman , the Vogue for the obese.
In what might be called a rather plump editorial -- weighing in at three pages -- Carole Shaw has this to say:
"Some crude people might call this Fat Power. And believe me, once we STOP APOLOGIZING to ourselves and the world because we are large, we will have political and economic clout."
Some of the Shaw's economic clout may come from the sale of BBW Jeans, offered on page 10 in the "new sensible sizes 18-28 (women's sizes 32-42)." TV Turnoff
Speaking of new, sensible, shrinking sizes, Panorama, the new television monthly from the publishers of TV Guide, not only has dumped editor Roger Youman but also has slashed its circulation guarantee to advertisers from 200,000 to 100,000.
The brainchild of former ambassador and Nixon-confident Walter Annenberg (who at TV Guide is still called Ambassador Annenberg), Panorama was envisioned as a guide to the non-network potential of the almighty Toobe.
Somebody guessed wrong. The first four issues were an incoherent hodge-podge that hardly hinted at what wonders television might work in the future. So Annenberg has called in TV Guide iditor Dave Sendler to clean up the magazine, which has graphics abysmal enough to scare a monkey away from reading the thing. Type Casting
And speaking of monkeys, Zippy the Chimp makes his first apperance on the cover of the June Esquire. He's pounding away at his Smith Corona, with a telephone, coffee cup, bottle of Scotch, Perrier, Pall Malls and bananas in reach, under the headline: "Is Anyone in America NOT Writing a Screenplay?"
The answer, of course, is no, and Swifty Lazar will be auctioning off the movie rights to this very magazine column next Wednesday at Elaine's. Finding Mr. Right
Speaking of movie rights, how about this personal ad from the current Washingtonian.
"ATTRACTIVE SJF -- 34, professionally accomplished, wants enduring monogamous relationship (marriage children) with professionally accomplished man who loves the arts, politics (Left-ish), beautiful things from Bloomingdales, keeping physically fit.Social/political consciousness, interest in public policy issues ESSENTIAL. Do you exist???"
Hey, that's our line. Friendly Suggestions
Speaking of personal ads, our favorite new magazine in the social-services genre is Pick-Up Times, a self-spoofing, wacko bimonthly published from the late Sid Vicious' former room at the Chelsea Hotel by Bob Singer, a former editor of High Times.
Consider this nugget, from Dean Latimer's "Twenty-Five Amazingly Effective Pick-Up Lines:
"There's a stray thread on your shoulder -- there, it's gone. Excuse me, you looked so perfect, I just had to pluck it off."
($12 annually from 222 West 23rd St., New York, N.Y. 10011.) Classy Classifieds
Speaking of excess, how about The Robb Report, a 116-page monthly compendium of illustrated classified ads for Rolls-Royces, Bentleys, aeroplanes, firearms and premium properties.
We have, for example, a 1972 Rolls-Royce Phantom VI, "possibly the only Phantom VI now in this country which conforms to all U.S. regulations, immaculate and perfect, bar with original crystal, originally built for Mid-East royalty, 7,000 miles, priced firm at $197,500."
($39.50 annually from Box 720317, Atlanta, Ga. 30328.) Pats & Plaudits Speaking of class:
The April 7 New West package on punk music, which precisely blends form and content.
The April 7 Sports Illustrated portfolio of Walter Iooss' sumptuous sports photos.
Pete Dexter's eerie profile of race car driver LeeRoy Yarbrough in the May Inside Sports.
Craig Vetter's hilarious analysis of what went wrong with the film version of Hunter Thompson's life in the appropriately titled "Destination Hollyweird" in the June Playboy.
Bill Barich's encyclopedic yet personalized look at race tracks, a two-part series that concluded in the May 12 New Yorker:
"Early the next morning I went to Golden Gate Fields ready to win. The grandstand was empty and quiet with the cool feel of a stainless-steel mixing bowl waiting for ingredients."
Capital Shopper, a promising consumer guide for the District and suburbs ($9.95 a year from Box 72, Fairfax Va 22030).
The March Living Wilderness special issue on Ansel Adams, with glorious photo reproduction and an exhaustive essay by Robert Turnage.
Essence's look back at a decade of black women's struggles in its dazzlingly designed 10th-anniversary May issue.
High Times' image-shattering June antidrug cover.
The first two issues of Museum, which explore in classy style museums dedicated to the future, railroads, cartoons, tennis, even Buffalo Bill Cody ($15 for six bimonthly issues from 175 Community Drive, Great Neck, N.Y. 11025).
Black Enterprise's industrious analysis of the top 100 black businesses in its June issue. Firm Footings
And speaking of business:
yamerican Business, an unusual compendium of business tidbits, is available free in return for a business card from 1775 Broadway, New York, N.Y. 10019.
Publisher Ralph Ginzburg says he's already upped his circulation from 100,000 to 200,000 using this ploy and claims he's getting a fantastic renewal rate (after four months you pay). "This has really helped our demographics, he says.
The American Society of Association Executives, which publishes a magazine on holding conventions, has issued its annual compendium on "finding the right speaker." You want Sen. Birch Bayh on "the working of the government"? That'll be $1,000 plus expenses. How about Earl Butz on "good government" or Henry Kissinger on "world affairs" ("reference: National Wholesale Druggists Association") or Roy Baunel, the "genuine authentic fake," who "poses as Latin American expert in client's field." This special report is $10 from 1575 Eye St. NW, Washington, D.C. 20005. Come Again?
Speaking of genuine authentic fakes, we were attracted to two abutting ads in the May 7 New York Times. On page D12, World Tennis magazine claims to be "first in circulation," while on neighboring D13 Tennis magazine claims to be "first in circulation." Your serve . . . Mort Zukerman, the Boston real-estate mogul who recently bought The Atlantic, is considering purchase of financially troubled Harper's and a merger of the two. . . . Saturday Review has switched from biweekly to monthly frequency. Food & Wine, unpublished since December, returns as a monthly this week with its June issue. . .
Walter Bernard, the art director of Time who so nicely redesigned the magazine three years ago, is leaving to pursue some personal challenges. . . .
Despite the recession, magazines were up for the first quarter, 18 percent in revenues and 7 percent in pages, over 1979 . . . INC. Magazine, aimed at small businessmen, reported the best first year of any magazine: 400,000 circulation, 648 pages of ads and $5.8 million in revenues. . . .
In the midst of all this prosperity, Media People folded, its final (June) issue chronicling the folding of Look magazine, in an amateurishly written piece. . . .
The National Federation for Decency, which circulates a monthly church newspaper, has named R. J. Reynolds Inc. "porno pushing advertiser" of the year, claiming Reynolds placed 70 pages of ads in porn mags in the first quarter of 1980. Joseph E. Seagram & Sons was second with 47 pages. . . .
GEO Magazine celebrates its first anniversasry today by paying Henry Kissinger several thousand dollars to speak off the record at a luncheon at Le Chantilly in New York. How a company that claims to report the news can sanction that is baffling.
And finally, the April 28 New York -- the first issue interpreting Cue Magazine -- included this note from editor Ed Kosner:
"This week's issue marks the return to the magazine of two of the most exciting writers ever to appear in the pages of New York -- Pete Hamill and Julie Baumgold."
Hamill may be exciting but -- yawn -- Julie Baumgold? She happens to be Mrs. Kosner.