Every year people speak out and then regret it for the rest of their lives. Aren't you lucky you weren't the person who said: To Lee Iacocca: "Don't worry Lee, the bank will give you all the money you need to get Chrysler on its feet."
To Roberto Duran, the Panamanian boxer: "Here, Roberto, have another meatball sandwich. It will give you sustenance in the ring."
To the head of United Artists: "I just saw the rushes of Michael Cimino's 'Heaven's Gate' and we're going to do bigger business than 'Star Wars.'
To Congressman Jenrette: "This is Sheik Abdul Hassan. He has a wonderful idea and he'd like to speak to you about it at a friend's house on W Street."
To President Bani-Sadr: "Our intelligence indicates that Iraq would never attack Iran because we're a Moslem country."
To the head of the Communist Party in Poland: "I just returned from Gdansk and the workers never looked so happy."
To Sen. Percy: "You'll really please the Reagan people if you leak the conversations you had with Brezhnev."
To the head of NASA: "If we don't have the space shuttle up by Christmas, I'll eat a Titan missile."
To Bill Paley, head of CBS: "The worst mistake would be to shoot J. R. in 'Dallas.' It would kill our ratings."
To Billy Carter: "Stonewall the Senate Committee about Libya. They're not going to touch the president's brother."
To the Joint Chiefs of Staff: "We don't need more than eight helicopters for an Iranian rescue operation. There are no sandstorms in Iran in April."
To the Soviet defense ministers: "Our troops should be out of Afghanistan in a month."
To Teddy Kennedy: "All you have to do is annunce you're a candidate for the presidency and you can have the nomination without a struggle."
To Rosie Ruiz, the marathon runner: "How would you like to win the 1980 Boston Marathon without any sweat?"
To the head of U.S. Immigration: "Castro isn't going to let any Cubans out of his country, so you can relax."
To Nancy Reagan: "The first thing you should do as First Lady is reveal that you sleep with a tiny pistol under your pillow."
To Pope John Paul II: "Why don't you devote next Sunday's sermon to husbands who lust after their wives?"
To William Agee, head of Bendix: "My advice is to go public with the Mary Cunningham rumors, and lay them to rest once and for all."
To former Secretary of State Cyrus Vance: "The only one you don't have to worry about in the White House is Zbigniew Brezezinski."
To Ronald Reagan: "Do you know that trees are responsible for more pollution than automobiles?"
To Madame Mao: "They don't have a case against you. Once they see you in the courtroom they'll know you couldn't have been a member of the Gang of Four."
To President Carter: "The only way to beat Reagan is to debate him one on one. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain."