If Christmas has snuck up on you again, here are some last- minute gift ideas from Santa's helpers: PROCRASTINATORS' SALE at H.H. Leonards. Prints, posters, drawings, paintings and antique furniture. Starts at 11 p.m. Friday and goes until 4 Christmas morning. Better late than ever: The art dealer at 2020 O Street NW promises 15 percent discounts from 11 to 1, 20 percent from 1 to 3:30, and 30 percent from 3:30 until 4. "All Santas who arrive in costume receive an additional 10 percent discount." COLD COMFORT -- Just in time for the slimming holidays, Bob's Famous Homemade Ice Cream introduces a new flavor: Gingerbread. "Very spicy with cookies and raisins in it," says mastermind Bob Weiss. Christmas gift certificates have been hot items (figure $2 for an austere sundae, $2.35 for a pint). Both stores are open until 9 Friday, closed Saturday, at 236 Massachusetts Avenue NE and 2416 Wisconsin Avenue NW. GREAT BUYS and fewer needles to sweep if you've waited until now for a tree: Prices start to drop at midday Friday at Johnson's Flower Center on Wisconsin Avenue, where discounts of 20 percent can be expected on a good supply of evergreens before the store closes at 5. WHAT'S IN A NAME department: "Cartridge in a Boot Tree," a ski-boot carrier packaged with a tape deck, cassette and cleaning fluid, is a clear case of stretching a gimmick to come up with a catchy trademark. Of course, schussing downhill with a symphony under your cap is the ultimate escape. It's $16.50 at Ski Haus, across from White Flint Mall on Rockville Pike, and less mess than geese a-laying. NEXT YEAR -- You'll be ahead of the game if, on Sunday, you have the energy (and the credit reserve) to head over to Creative Christmas at White Flint Mall. From 10 to 7, the year-round yuletide store takes 30 to 70 percent off on selected items. The day-after sale was a mob scene last year but there are usually enough ornaments left to start the whole season over again. Only 364 days. . . COMPUTER COMPATIBILITY -- Disc Operations, (578-3612) will provide bliss through biorhythms for 1983. The company matches a couple's quotient for compatibility in three areas for only $10. His-and-her highs available in three ranges -- physicality, sensitivity and intellectuality. No lows, though. Wait is up to two weeks for best results. BET-A-MILLION CHEAPSKATES -- Stuff his or her stocking with D.C. Lottery tickets. BIG SPENDERS ONLY -- Moneygram's armored car will deliver (on Christmas Eve) from $10,000 to $100,000,000 in cold cash. The package comes with a gunman dressed in S.W.A.T. team attire. The million-dollar bag doubles as beanbag chair. You put the money up front, of course; the delivery cost is $39.95 for $10,000 and $89,95 for $100,000,000. Call 342-2195. SLEEPING ALONE getting a friend down? Get'em up with the Cosmo Time Talker, a clock radio with a pleasant male voice. Under $50 at People's Drug and other stores. REAGANOMIC STOCKING STUFFER -- A gift certificate from The Resume Place Inc. may help an unemployed friend find a new job in the new year. An old resume gets a new look -- reorganized, designed, typeset and printed on high-quality paper; 50 copies for $56.50. A new you on paper, with counseling, can cost from $95 to $235. Call 737-8637. LAST BLAST -- "The Last Washington Picture," by Alan Sonneman, is selling like hotcakes at the Local 1734 Art Gallery in Washington. His offset poster of a nuclear cloud mushrooming over the 14th Street Bridge is $10. Phone 797-9264. GIVE A FISH --Adopt a gag grouper, a French grunt, a convict kelp fish or one of 147 other specimens for $15 to $100 each from the National Aquarium in Baltimore. The fish don't leave their home, so your donation goes toward their care and feeding. Proud parents are issued a certificate. Call Aquadopt Program, 301/727-FISH or write to 501 East Pratt Street, Baltimore 21202. SPONSOR AN OPERA -- For $100,000, the Washington Opera will allow you to choose a production, attend rehearsals and even have a walk-on part. Or, for a mere $50,000, you can buy a half-inch-scale model of Act 11, the Cafe Scene of La Boheme, designed by well-known set designer Zak Brown. Kennedy Center, Washington 20566. 822-4721. GIVE A GIFT OF STONE -- A limited supply of numbered and unnumbered stones can still be bought to help fund the Pilgrim Observation Gallery of The Washington Cathedral. Gifts will be recorded in the Cathedral Book of Remembrance and a certificate, worded to your request, is sent. Price: $100-$1,250. National Cathedral Association, Washington 20016. Or call 537-6200. YOU GOTTA HAVE HEART -- Make many children happy this Christmas: Donate to Children's Hospital National Medical Center a cardio-pulmonary bypass pump for infant heart-surgery patients. It's no small gift at $41,000. Also needed are four monitoring systems for the burn center. They cost $11,000 each. All donations will be appropriately recognized by cards or plaques. Development Department, 111 Michigan Avenue NW, Washington 20010. 745-3000. TAKE A TRIP to the North Pole: Balloons for All Occasions will fly you on a private plane to see St. Nick. Then, weather permitting, up in a hot air balloon to look for reindeer. Price of the four-day package for two: $150,000. P.O. Box 2521, Fairfax 22031. Or call 698-9564. STARGAZING -- Send for the Smithsonian Institution's solid-brass reproduction of a 19th-century floor tripod telescope. Able to magnify an erect image 60 times, it features a 31/4-inch front objective with brass lens cap and 12-inch brass finder's scope. Members: $2,970; nonmembers: $3,300. Shipping and handling extra. P.O. Box 2456, Washington. Or call 455-1700. NUTCRACKER SUITE -- The Washington School of Ballet offers 50 lessons to adult beginners for $575. Gift certificates are available. 3515 Wisconsin Avenue NW, Washington 20016. Or call 362-1683. QUEEN OR KING FOR A DAY -- Purchase a gift certificate from Maid to Order, and once a week for a year a personal maid will make your home (or a friend's) spanking clean. Price: $2,080. 10 Post Office Road, Silver Spring, 20910. Or call 585-3836. SAVE THE TREES -- World Magazine, National Geographic Society's magazine for children 8 to 13, is continuing the Society's tradition of redwood conservation. This time, it's mounting an effort to buy a redwood grove in northern California to add to the state's redwood park system. Adopting a grove costs $15,000, but even the smallest contribution is welcome. The name of every contributor will appear in a future issue of WORLD as part of a supersize design resembling a redwood tree, and abench in the grove will have the name of national Geographic WORLD on it. To contribute, print your name, address and telephone number clearly on a card or letter. Mail it to National Geographic Society, P.O. Box 37249, Washington 20013. A WEIGHTY PROSPECT -- if your New Year's resolution is to get back into shape and hang the expense, order American Physical Fitness Company's Pro Gym. For $12,304, delivery and installation included, a complete gymnasium can be yours. Covering a 20 x 20 foot area, it has 16 stations including chinning bar, abdominal board with nine levels, curls and extensions and leg and chest presses. 4021 South 28th Street, Arlington 22206. Or call 671-5800. A LITTLE NIGHT MUSIC -- Rent musicians for a party or a romantic celebration at home. Anything from Big Band sounds to a string quartet. Prices vary according to number of musicians and length of performance. Gene Donati Productions, 4201 Connecticut Avenue NW, Suite 210, Washington 20008. Or call 667-6316. WHALE WATCH -- A special expedition planned by the Oceanic Society and the San Francisco Zoological Society takes you to the Sea of Cortez in search of blue whales. Amid a fine array of plants, birds, reptiles, fish, sea lions and dolphins, there are blue, fin, minke, gray, sperm and killer whales to be seen. The one-week expedition departs from La Paz, Bolivia, March 27 to April 3, 1983. Cost: $895 per person, including room and meals aboard the 95-foot vessel, the Executive. Oceanic Society Expeditions, Fort Mason Center, Building E, San Francisco 94123. Or call 415/441-1106. VINTAGE CHRISTMAS -- Available from Bell Wine and Spirit Shoppe is their "Ode to Gracious Living." Set No. 1, $1,250, features a DaSilva Jubilee Port, 1887 vintage, late bottled in December 1933; a Chateau Y'Quem, 1893; and a Chateau Pichon Longueville, 1878. Other gift sets available include a Cognac Denis Mounie, believed to be a special bottling for King Edward VII who died in 1910, and a Grand Armagnac R,eserve Sp,eciale du "Lion D'or," $225 for the two. 1821 M Street NW, Washington 20036. Or call 223-4727. PLAY DADDY WARBUCKS -- For $100,000 you can receive a private tour or you can throw a party in the fun rooms of the Capitol Children's Museum. Or better still: Open it for free to underprivileged or handicapped children. All the costumes, telephones, parking meters, buses, cars, games and lots more make it a children's wonderland. Development Office, 800 Third Street NE, Washington 20002. Or call 543-8600. SUPPORT THE PHILLIPS -- Individual memberships in the Phillips Collection are now available: private, $1,500-$3,000; corporate memberships, $2,500-$5,000. Membership entitles you to an invitation to an annual social gathering with the museum's board and executives. Your monies go to restoring paintings and improving museum facilities. 1600 21st Street NW, Washington 20009. Or call 387-2151. VIDEO ONEUPSMANSHIP -- Now you can have arcade-size video games for your home. Play anytime, or at least until the kids find out! Ms Pac Man ($2,795), Tron ($2,800), Donkey Kong ($2,800) and Jungle King ($2,895). Home Amusement Company, 11910 Parklawn Drive, Rockville 20852. 468-0070. FOUR CALLING BIRDS -- What about four squawking (tame, of course) Moluccan Cockatoos? They're $3,800 from Hauser's House of Pets in College Park. Other calling birds available: multi-colored Lady Gouldian finches at $370 for four. 9078 Baltimore Avenue, College Park 20740. 474- 7229. RENEW YOUR SOUL -- No more than eight guests a week may visit the Kerr House in Grand Rapids, Ohio. The emphasis at this health retreat is on rejuvenation. Yoga, massages and facials; sauna, whirlpool and mineral baths; lavishly served natural foods are only part of the special program. Stress management, diet control and muscle tone are fringe benefits. $1,500 per person; gift certificates available. 419/832-1733. A GIFT OF LOVE -- If you're an animal-lover, or you know a child who is, you might want to contribute to The WashingtonAnimal Rescue League. Any size donation, even as small as one dollar, is appreciated, and your gift will be acknowledged by a card. Donations go toward the care and feeding of the animals until they are placed. 71 Oglethorpe Street NW, Washington 20011. 726-2556. CHOCOLATE CHRISTMAS CARDS -- write your own holiday greetings in incing on a chocolate card by Kron Chocolatiers: 6 X 8 inches, $20; 8 X 16 inches, $40. Also available: chocolate magnum of champagne, $100; chocolate baskets filled with fruit dipped in chocolate, $80. All shipped for you at small extra cost. 5300 Wisconsin Avenue NW, Washington 20015. 966-4946.