The crop of books on finding love and romance ranges from honorable to slightly sleazy. Although most are aimed at women, the best could also entertain and instruct men. Because buying more than one at a time might make you seem a trifle desperate, herewith a ranking in relative order of merit:
* Honorable Intentions: The Manners of Courtship in the '80s by Cheryl Merser (Holt, Rinehart and Winston, 1984, $7.95). One of the most straightforward guides to relationships around. Particularly good on the problems and prospects for singles in their thirties and forties.
* Sex Tips for Girls by Cynthia Heimel (Simon & Schuster, 1983, $7.95). What's lacking in practicality is made up by the humor. Provides ways to tell you're in love ("If one of your major fantasies about him involves shopping in supermarkets"), telephone rules and regulations ("Do not accept phone calls from men who say, 'Hi, it's me' "), and the 10 greatest country-and-western songs to cure heartbreak (including Willie Nelson's "The Last Thing I Needed the First Thing This Morning Was to Have You Walk Out on Me").
* What Do Men Want From Women? by Robert Masello (Ballantine, 1983, $4.95). Pithy advice from a male perspective, the columnist for Mademoiselle. Includes the Four Great Don'ts, among them: "Don't clean up your apartment before going out." (Coming home to a clean place only makes things worse: a reminder your plans didn't work out.)
* Men: An Owner's Manual by Stephanie Brush (Linden Press, 1984, $11.95). Racy jokes are its raison d'e tre; any advice is strictly incidental.
* Playgirl's Guide: How to Meet Men by Ellen Sklarz (Wallaby/Simon & Schuster, 1984, $6.95). If you're over 15, you know everything offered here. "Haven't we met before?" is considered an original opening line.