TAB HUNTER and Divine, costars of "Polyester," that classic in cheap synthetics and smell-o-rama, return in a brand new megastinker, a malodorous comic western called "Lust in the Dust."
"Lust" is a bust on a couple of fronts. Divine, an out-sized parody of big, vulgar women like Jayne Mansfield, shows off her vast, flabby hams and plushy breasts, rising like dough from a corset-shaped pan. Call her Pauncho.
She follows our taciturn hero -- Hunter in his lame lampoon of spaghetti cowboys -- to the dirtwater town of Chili Verde. Lainie Kazan, nearly as ample as Divine her divine self, costars as owner of the local saloon where the three stars and sundry others gather in search of a stash of lost gold.
The two behemoths, their corsets straining like dams holding back a sea of polyurethane packing chips, gibe and screech and finally scratch and claw in what director Paul Bartel must see as camp hilarity.
What Bartel, who wrote and directed "Eating Raoul" and other cultish comedies, achieves here is inane vulgarity. And that's especially disappointing since we were expecting trash and sleaze elevated somewhat by Bartel's special brand of enlightened lunacy. Alas.
Divine, with her knack for comic debauchery, does extract a little laughter, albeit laboriously, when she turns the tables on a gang of rapists. Her appetite is voracious in all things, and her response to sexual overtures can be overwhelming. She crushes an amorous midget and breaks the neck of the piano player. Even the horses run away.
"Lust in the Dust," in the vein but not the spirit of "Blazing Saddles," is a stupefyingly uninspired spoof, a pandering come-on to cult audiences. Partners, this is a stick-up. LUST IN THE DUST (R) -- Area theaters.