Anyone who would consider watching a TV show with a title like "99 Ways to Attract the Right Man" should probably not be dissuaded from tuning in at 10 tonight on Channel 7 for an hour of pure trash that's embarrassing, ridiculous and occasionally entertaining.
Susan Lucci (Erica Kane Martin Brent Cudahy Chandler on "All My Children") and Tony Danza ("Who's the Boss?") ask single men and women for their answers to earth-shattering questions like "What's the best place to meet men?" Answer: department stores and supermarkets, of course. So off they go to "report" on the final exam of a class in which women are let loose in Bloomingdale's to shop for men and then head for a supermarket, where the married Lucci is somehow persuaded to take a stab at attracting guys who pass by the rutabagas.
The program is filled with other such informative and helpful tidbits for America's single women. After all, who could exist for another instant without knowing that San Diego has the most single men, that Tony Danza loves satin sheets and that Roger Moore probably likes to keep the lights on when he's feeling romantic. One can never have enough of this kind of stuff, but the show's writers apparently had a hard time finding enough of it. You know they're in trouble when not only are the opening minutes filled with clips of the hour to come, but the program ends with a replay of "highlights" we've just witnessed.
Comics Maureen Murphy, Lois Bromfield and Judy Carter add their observations on men and romance, but the program's brightest moments are those supplied by the world's most charming sex therapist, Dr. Ruth Westheimer. Perched on the edge of her armchair, Dr. Ruth ignores Danza's sniggering to dispense advice in her inimitable fashion on topics like what a girl's to do when her parents surprise her with a Sunday morning visit while she's got a man in her bed (hide him in the bathroom and take her parents to brunch).
Lucci has wise counsel of her own. "It's good to remember that women don't have to just sit there and take it," she says. It's good to remember that TV viewers don't have to sit there and take it, either. They can reach up and turn off frivolous shows like this.