My peripheral vision being what it is, it has taken me several weeks to notice an increasingly bulging folder on my desk. But I have just unloaded it, and the contents should take the chill off a late November morning.
Here, waiting world, is the latest collection of Perfect Fit Last Names (PFLN's) -- those handles so exactly right that all you can do is guffaw.
Ned Dolan of Garrett Park kicks things off with a surgical intern he met in 1951 at Camp Lejeune, N.C.: Dr. (Lt. j.g.) G.N. Carver.
Ken Rudin is a Washingtonian now. But in his former life as a resident of Hackensack, N.J., his dentist was Dr. Paul Fear.
Jonathan P. Marget almost choked when he read a story in The Wall Street Journal about a food industry consultant named Faith Popcorn.
Seldom does anything good result from a car crash. Ben Willis of McLean begs to differ. A few years back, Ben was bumped into by a man from Fairfax named Gary B. Basham.
She lived in Charleston, W.Va., "a few" years ago, admits Margaret R. White of Springfield. But time has not dulled the memory of three coworkers at the Appalachian Power Co.: Mr. Watts, Mr. Currence and Mr. Van Metre.
Television, often the home of the incredible, lives up to its reputation with the names of two executives. The program director of WUFT in Gainesville, Fla., is Kathy Channel. And the general manager of WNIN in Evansville, Ind., is David Dial. Meanwhile, farther south, the weatherman on Channel 51 in Miami is Al Sunshine, reports Virginia Logue of Springfield.
Butch Proctor of Laurel writes that, when he worked at a Giant Food store in Rockville a decade ago, the seafood manager was Howard Scales.
From Isabelle Barylski of Rockville: "My son Steve Barylski of Rockville has a friend, Chris Faith, who attends a South Carolina seminary and whose in-laws live on Divine Street in McLean!"
Thanks, Jane Pridgen of Great Falls, for the name of the new deputy director of programs at the Voice of America: Robert L. Chatten.
Up in Hagerstown, reports David S. Dorman, there's a lawyer named Dixie Newhouse. She specializes in helping first-time homebuyers settle.
Donna Jeanne Kaplan of Northwest could think of only one place to send the name of the elementary curriculum coordinator for the Woonsocket, R.I., education department. He's Gerald L. Schooley.
"We recently updated our Orange County Civic List," writes Curtis S. Pendergrass, executive director of the Orange County (Va.) Chamber of Commerce, "and it made my day to learn that Mrs. Ansel Seeds is president of the Village Garden Club in Barboursville, Va."
Pam Bassett is the afternoon announcer at WABS, a Christian radio station broadcasting out of Arlington at 780 AM. She'd like to "turn in" the station manager -- Steve Cross.
And who was the tax collector in Cumberland, Md., way back when? Cathy Moore of Woodbridge remembers him perfectly: Francis Philpott.
Paul Stutz moved from Washington to Bayside, N.Y., a few years back. He passes along the name of a New York area lawyer who specializes in sensational, difficult cases: Murray Sprung.
Lawrence M. Greenberg of Lake Ridge, Va., had little trouble recalling a fellow cadet at ROTC summer training: Grady Sergeant. When Grady became commissioned, he was an instant mixed metaphor: Lieutenant Sergeant.
Melissa Sawtelle of Burke recalls that Gwendolyn Sharp used to give piano lessons to her sister, Jeanne.
Abbe Trenchard works in the brokerage office at the Columbia First Federal branch in Bethesda. She has two cohorts whose names couldn't be more apt: Linda Rich and Brad Livengood.
Much obliged, Barb Boblick of Rockville, for a Poolesville obstetrician, Dr. Erik B. Young.
Willie P. Robinson of the D.C. Department of Finance and Revenue recently ran across a retiree named Joseph F. St. Peter. "His former government job, prior to retirement, was with the D.C. Morgue," Willie writes, "and persons often would hang up on him when he answered the office phone, 'D.C. Morgue, St. Peter speaking.' "
Who's the spokesman for the Royal Hanneford Circus, a British road outfit? None other than Joseph Theodore Clown (thanks, Michael R. Codel).
Three from the wonderful word of education: Carol LeKashman remembers that at Wellesley College in the early 1970s, a Mrs. Just taught political science, a Mrs. Deutsch taught German and a Mr. Francois taught French. Ann Modlin of Lanham reports that Tom Lively is an instrumental music teacher in Prince George's County. And Kim Woodbury, a senior at Langley High School, would like us all to know that her art teacher is Mr. Magenta.
Got a goodie? Please mail it to Bob Levey, The Washington Post, Washington, D.C., 20071.