What better way to send March out like a lion than with another collection of Perfect Fit Last Names (PFLNs)? They are endlessly delightful, always appropriate and (as my file folder knows only too well) increasingly numerous. So we'll call what follows a fit of PFLN spring cleaning. Here goes:
Mabel Banks works in a savings and loan in Salisbury, Md., according to Paula Johnson of that Eastern Shore metropolis.
Who's the president of the Crown of Laurel Toastmasters Club? Why, Frank Yap, of course (thanks, Harold Grainger, also of Laurel).
As always, the realm of the lord is a PFLN treasure trove. Some nuggets: Rev. Maurice Amen is a missionary in Japan, reports an anonymous reader. Rev. Michael Parrish recently took the reins of St. Joseph's Parish in Baltimore, reports Teri Mignosa of Bowie. And John E. Hissrich reports that his fellow seminarians at Mount St. Mary Seminary in Emmitsburg, Md., included John Grace, Charlie Pope and John Christian.
He may not be tax-exempt or municipal, but Marvin A. Bond is still a well-monikered gent, considering that he works for the Maryland comptroller's office (tip of the cap for this one to Abraham Stahler of Silver Spring).
Helen Thompson of Hollywood, Md., caught a double-barreled beaut not long ago. After a public TV show about Chesapeake Bay, producer David F. Oyster and photographer Joe Seamans appeared in the credits.
Ann Rose of Silver Spring nominates Raymond Jungles, a landscape architect in Miami. Melissa Pollak of Arlington nominates Philip Eggborn, a bird control supervisor for the Virginia Department of Agriculture and Commerce. Joan Muckenhaupt of Arlington submits Leif Roar, a Wagnerian baritone for the Metropolitan Opera. And Mabel Morris of Northwest submits Thomas Sweet, who owns an ice cream and chocolate store in Georgetown.
Pleasant are the reminiscences of retired college professors. Particularly pleasant is word from Edwin L. Stevens, who used to be a speech professor at George Washington University. He reports that one of the most attractive coeds he ever taught was named Brondi Topchik.
Nor is journalism exempt from this delicious madness. Frances D. Collins of Chevy Chase notes that Robert Farrar Capon is a food and wine critic for the New York Times.
Donna G. Spann of Andrews Air Force Base reports that James Couch was the head of the psychology department at James Madison University in the early 1980s. Bruce Johnson of Bowie says the tournament chairman for the Professional Bowlers Association is Bill Strike. Lion Gardiner Jr. sends word that the choir director at McLean High School is Chanson Finney. And let's hope this one isn't literally true: "Anonymously Yours" says the chief classification and parole officer at Lorton Reformatory is Paul Krull (pronounced "cruel").
Jane McGarry of Rockville says she grew up in Topsfield, Mass., where there was a phone operator named Belle Dingle.
Kym Davis of Falls Church says she'll never forget this one, and it's no wonder. When she worked in the personnel office at the Washington Navy Yard 11 years ago, the head of the transportation division was V. (for Vincent) Hickle.
Edna McDonald of Northwest remembers a feeling-no-pain duo from years ago at Hardy Elementary School in Foxhall. The principal was Miss Wine and her secretary was Mrs. Beer.
From another school slightly to the north: "I, my brother and many other students at Richard Montgomery High School in Rockville studied in the late '60s-early '70s under one Mr. Formulak." And what did he teach, Lynn Russell of Gaithersburg? Chemistry, natch.
Two goodies from Jack Melnick of Silver Spring. Jack says Robert Price of Oxon Hill is a financial planner, and Bill Titelman used to be the director of motor vehicles for the state of Pennsylvania.
Jennifer Mellody of Vienna doesn't say if she's musically inclined. But she does her say that her sister, Maureen, has been a violin student for four years.
Here's one that's perfectly imperfect. Phil and Dorothy Clark of Warrenton write that they recently paid a visit to their daughter and son-in-law in Otisville, N.Y. "They both work at the federal prison there," Phil and Dorothy report. "They took us on a tour of the prison and introduced us to the new warden -- Jesse James!"
The medical profession gets a vote from Kay Gabany of Burke. "While working at Santa Teresa Hospital in San Jose, Calif.," she writes, "one of the emergency room doctors was John B. Quick."
And finally for this batch, a gem in the General Accounting Office, that land of folks who watch funds. One such is Osmund T. Fundingsland (many thanks, Michael Resnick).
Got a goodie? Don't you dare keep it to yourself. Mail it to Perfect Fit Last Names, c/o Bob Levey, The Washington Post, Washington, D.C., 20071.