DOCTOR NIGHTLIFE still cherishes the memory of the Godfather's personal blessing (she was underage, but feelin' good); so in his honor, she's getting in a funk for the Royal Crescent Mob, Monday at the 9:30 club ($9; 393-0930). Elsewhere: FRIDAY
MALLET, DON'T HURT 'EM --
While many of the new-generation Cajun rockers (Zachary Richard, Wayne Toups, Jo-El Sonnier) are obviously feeling the squeeze to center, Terrance Simien is still rattling around in left field. With the Mallet Playboys at the 9:30 club ($9; 393-0930).
LOVE AND MONEY --
Are we the only ones who think it's at least a little ironic that the troubled and famously internecine Beach Boys are releasing the title track to "Problem Child" as a single? Never mind: It's summer, it's outdoors, and they'll probably be hood-surfing in the parking lot at Merriweather Post ($25 pavilion, $13.50 lawn seating; 800/543-3041). Meanwhile, in a further bit of irony, the three remarkably sane offspring of, uh, less equalized parents, Beach Boy Brian Wilson's kids Carnie and Wendy, and John and Michelle Phillips's extraordinarily beautiful Chynna, open as Wilson Phillips for Richard Marx on Sunday at King's Dominion ($6, plus park admission; 432-0200). SATURDAY
WALK THIS WAY --
If the Robinson brothers of Black Crowes are in their 20s, and Steve Tyler and Joe Perry of Aerosmith (who enlisted the Crowes for this tour by sending a fan-mail fax) are still alive (!) in their 30s, and Jagger and Richards are in their 40s, John Mayall in his 50s, Bo Diddley in his 60s, Muddy Waters in his 70s . . . does that make Robert Johnson the father of us all? The kids are all right: the Crowes and Aerosmith carry on at Capital Centre ($22.50; 432-0200).
VIDEO VERITE --
Some performance art can be esoteric; some feminist satire can be heavier than the originals. The only drag about Esmirelda is her all-male en tutu dance line. The burlesque queen of toilet humor is taping a video; you can trash along, at the D.C. Arts Center ($5; 462-7833). Dress optional, but leave all blue stockings at home.
A BYRD IN HAND --
Hearing Roger McGuinn solo will make you nostalgic for a few harmonies, but it's not likely to come up short many other ways. Judging from his appearance at Wolf Trap last summer, he's in absolutely superb voice -- and anybody who can recreate the break from "Eight Miles High" on a single, yes, Rickenbacker, may not need a band, anyway (Saturday and Sunday at the Birchmere; $15, 432-0200). Opening is ex-Wild Seeds country-rocker Kris McKay, who slipped on, to too little notice, before the Indigo Girls in April.
JAZZ GUITAR (UNDER THE) STARS --
Guitarist Stanley Jordan plays so many "jazz" styles, swing to fusion, that it didn't even seem particularly strange to hear him play "Stairway to Heaven" on "Austin City Limits." He and George Duke give easy listening a good name at Carter Barron. Tickets ($11) at Ticketron or Woodies ticket outlets Friday; Saturday at 10 remaining tickets go on sale at the amphitheater box office (426-6943). MONDAY
PRESERVE AND PROTECT --
The first time Doctor Nightlife went to New Orleans on her own (also underage), she wandered into the narrow vestibule of Preservation Hall, disappeared into the smoke, and about four hours later was rediscovered sitting on the grimy floor within head-patting distance of the front line. Many of the Preservation Hall Jazz Band's veterans have passed on since then, but they're still as straight and gimmickless as that grubby wooden meeting room. They play Wolf Trap, where the ground is a lot cleaner ($16 pavilion, $11 lawn; 432-0200). TUESDAY
A SOLITARY BRAND --
Intelligent Texas songwriters are like longhorns: They keep the heads down and stick a narrow path -- and hold their own even on the scruffiest feed. It's been 10 years since "Romeo's Tune," and other dirt-road poets have made under-appreciated appearances; but Steve Forbert just keeps on. With his band, the Cards, at the Birchmere ($15; 432-0200). WEDNESDAY
COME ALONG AND JOIN THE FUN --
Eek-a-Mouse -- the nomme de reggae of 6-foot-6 but high-pitched Ripton Joseph Hylton -- is a cross between Bobby McFerrin and Joe Tex; crackling, good-humored and with skinny-legs social satire, all powered by a reggae V-8. Don't worry, be rappy (at the 9:30 club; $12; 393-0930).
MUSIC FROM THE HEART --
The official bio sheet on country singer Cleve Francis doesn't mention that he only moonlights at his music. In "real" life, he's a cardiologist in Mount Vernon; singing paid his whole way through school, including med school, and ever since he's been using his music money to subsidize needy patients. His indie-label "Last Call for Love" album has been a modest hit, but his "Lovelight" video is hot stuff on the CTV networks. Francis plays Wednesday and Thursday at Zed in Alexandria (768-5558); seating is sold out, but loungers may squeeze in. THURSDAY
POP TOPS --
Once of the greatest voices in rock 'n' roll, ex-Box Top prodigy (he was underage, too) and Big Star Alex Chilton was almost forgotten until the heartland's best Replacements introduced a whole new generation to his Memphis muscle (at the 9:30 club; $9, 393-0930).