Diplomatic Song & Dance

Picture this: Colin Powell as the Construction Worker from the Village People. We know it's a stretch, but actually you don't have to try: He's done it for you. At the Association of Southeast Asian Nations Regional Forum in Indonesia, the U.S. secretary of state threw on a hard hat, slid a hammer into his belt and sang "YMCA." (We would have thought the general would have opted for the GI character, but, clearly, that's just us.)

Think we're kidding? As part of the tradition at Asia's largest security conference each year, various officials typically conclude their time well spent by giving a little performance. (Understandably, it's a closed-door event, but footage was nabbed yesterday by Associated Press Television News.) In 1997, Madeleine Albright did her best impersonation of Eva Peron, and now Powell, with five other U.S. officials dancing alongside, has rendered Construction Worker. (The song of choice from the Russians was the Beatles' "Yellow Submarine.")

"President Bush, he said to me, 'Colin, I need you to run the Department of State. We are between a rock and a hard place,' " Powell apparently sang to the popular disco ditty of the late '70s.

(Doesn't "It's fun to search for the WMD" have a better ring to it?)

Nicole Kidman: Lonely Heart

Poor, poor Nicole Kidman.

Let's see: What doesn't she have? She has an Oscar. She has millions. She and her ex, Tom Cruise, have two children. She ranks as an A-list celeb. She has the world's attention, thanks to her striking beauty and talent. But a date? Not a one.

Nic tells Now mag: "I'm hoping to meet someone and be happy with them. But that's not as easy as it sounds. I'm a 37-year-old woman with two children. Men aren't beating a path to my door."

So, fellas: Take note!

Singing the Blues

Time for Celebrity Crime Roundup! Rapper Ja Rule got busted early Thursday morning in Manhattan, and he's not the only one. In a separate incident in Manhattan, tap dance guru Savion Glover got popped. Both were charged with driving without a license and misdemeanor possession of marijuana. Ja Rule pleaded guilty to driving without a license and paid $550, while his possession charge was dropped. Glover ("Bring In 'da Noise, Bring In 'da Funk") fessed up to possession and was released on his own recognizance. He'll return to court on Aug. 16.

Meanwhile, David Crosby has paid 5,000 clams for a gun violation in Manhattan. When a gun, some ammo and two knives were found in his luggage at a New York hotel in May, the 62-year-old rocker was arrested. He pleaded guilty to attempted criminal possession of a weapon in the third degree -- a charge that could bring four years in prison. Luckily, the judge discharged the case on the conditions that Crosby pay the fine and steer clear of getting arrested again.

Noted . . .

Bad boy Colin Farrell, known for his womanizing ways and chiseled features, may have charmed Tinseltown beauties like Angelina Jolie and Britney Spears for a night or two -- or so various pictures have implied -- but 22-year-old "Spider-Man 2" cutie Kirsten Dunst says she'll never be added to Farrell's ever-growing list. "He's that drunken boy, right?" London's Daily Mirror reported her as saying. "I don't think he's that great looking. . . . He doesn't impress me." . . . And Mr. and Mrs. Veep can add one more to their clan. Liz Cheney gave birth to the Cheneys' fourth grandchild (but first grandson), Philip Richard Perry, yesterday in Washington. Daddy is lawyer Phil Perry.

. . . and Quoted

"He will get crucified."

-- Antonio Banderas, in the Scottish Daily Record, predicting reaction to pal Justin Timberlake's foray into acting.

-- Compiled by Anne Schroeder

from staff and wire reports

Secretary of State Colin Powell: Auditioning for a second career in Jakarta?