Dear Amy:

So, you'd like to hear from men about what women can do so they'll feel special?

You mean besides letting us watch ESPN at will?

I'd say that we want pretty much what women want. To be told, "I love you," "You look great!" and that you appreciate our relationship.


Who knew it would be so easy?

Dear Amy:

I'm sure 10 million men are writing to you right now with some variant of the following: If a woman really wants a man to "feel special," one item is guaranteed to do it.

Just try to have sex with him a little more often than the usual absolute minimum you dole out, and every so often try to make it playful and different in some way, rather than following the exact routine you've fallen into over the decades.

You might have to pretend a bit, but your man will be immensely cheered up and far more compliant.

Sometimes Cheerful

Lord knows, sometimes we just want you to be compliant.

Dear Amy:

In the words of Otis Redding, "Try a Little Tenderness."

As you well know, most guys are teddy bears on the inside, regardless of how they are on the outside, and a little TLC can go a long way toward making us feel special.


ESPN and TLC. Got it.

Dear Amy:

My wife is great at making me feel special. Like women, men do like to hear that their partner loves them. They might not respond, but they appreciate it.

Be direct -- no hinting or subtlety. Just come out and say what you want.

Spend equal time on what we did right, not on what we did wrong.

Nagging and whining are the worst things you can do.

An occasional thank you for something we've done goes a long way (it's amazing how many women are courteous and gracious to everyone but their partner).

As partners, my wife and I are very appreciative and caring.

We couldn't be happier.

Loved and Needed in Md.

If you're happy, then the rest of us are happy too.

Dear Amy:

What makes men happy? Show up nude, bring chicken wings and don't block the TV.


Can the chicken wings be nude too?

Dear Amy:

As a divorced veteran of more than 20 years of doing it all wrong, my sweetest of sweethearts now does everything right. She shows sincere appreciation for any task I do, from outside the home to the kitchen to the bedroom -- there is always a "Thank you so much."

It took until nearly age 50 to do it right, but my marriage is the perfect reward, and it just gets sweeter all the time!

Old Dog Who Learned

I'm so glad you learned some "new tricks."

Thanks to the many men who responded to this question. You're thoughtful, smart and funny. No wonder we women like you so much. Now, hand over the remote!

Write to Amy Dickinson at or Ask Amy, Chicago Tribune, TT500, 435 N. Michigan Ave., Chicago, Ill. 60611.

(c)2005 by the Chicago Tribune

Distributed by Tribune Media Services Inc.