Having survived criticism that it is: too secretive; not secretive enough; backs the wrong kings and/or fails to back freedom-loving good guys, the Central Intelligence Agency has a new crisis in its own back yard: Parking.
So serious is the situation that the CIA has gone to the White House. It has asked that it be exempted from upcoming rules that will require most of the 30,000 federal workers here who park at the office to begin paying for their spaces this October.
CIA sources confirm that the super-secret agency has asked the president's Office of Management and Budget to exempt it from the president's parking order, designed to cut down on the number of people driving to work.
The new order, which goes into effect Oct. 1, will mean most federal workers who park at the office will begin paying an average of about $25 a month for spaces they now get free, or at low subsidized rates. Exact charges will vary, depending on commercial parking rates near government buildings.
CIA wants out because it is out there in Langley, Va., with only a small outpost of the Bureau of Public Roads as a neighbor. The CIA planned it that way, placing its headquarters operation in a beautiful -- and inaccessible -- setting surrounded by woods.
CIA's rationale is that workers from Virginia, Maryland and D.C. almost have to drive to work. There is bus service -- of sorts -- from the Rosslyn area and downtown. But it is not enough to accommodate secretaries, economists and spooks who report for work daily, and nightly by the thousands, mostly by car.
CIA analysts have concluded that since workers must drive anyhow, there would be no energy saving by charging them for parking. Part of the pay-for-parking scheme government-wide is to force federal workers who now drive to take the bus, or cram into car pools.
Federal officials at other government agencies in charge of the parking situation would not comment on the CIA request. "Look, there is a CIA! I admit knowing that! I can't tell you anything else!" a non-CIA type said.
If CIA wins the exemption, workers in other remote areas -- Suitland, Gaithersburg -- where commercial parking is as rare as good bus service, will seek similar treatment. A parking official said: "We'll take this one case at a time. Nobody wants to pay for parking and we've had 100 good reasons from most agencies so far why their people shouldn't pay.
Four Letter First: The August issue of the American Postal Worker Union magazine (Page 21)may become a collector's item in hit-the-fan journalism. Columnist Ben Zemsky cracked the naughty word barrier using an expletive (usually deleted) to describe the postmaster general. Zemsky should get lots of feedback. Odds are, however, he will not be invited to become deputy postmaster general anytime soon, or to write the "chaplains corner" column for any publication.
Position Classification Specialists: Labor has a Grade 12 job. Call 523-6863 . . . Customs has four openings at the Grade 9 through 12 level. Call 566-2451.
Auditor: Federal Home Loan Bank Board wants them, at GS 11 through 13. It also needs permanent and temporary clerk-typists, GS 3 or 4. Call 377-6062.
Laborers Watned: Library of Congress has openings for a laborer foreman and laborers. Call 287-5620.
A. Lee Fritschler has taken over as Chairman of the Postal Rate Commission. He's former dean of American University's college of public and international affairs. Fritschler succeeds Clyde Dupont as chairman, although Dupont (a Republican) remains as a commissioner.
Illustrator, Secretaries: Federal Deposit Insurance Corporation has a Grade 7 illustrator vacancy (must have notice of rating) and needs GS 4 and 5 secretaries. Call 389-4671.