On Sept. 6, Merrie Spaeth, director of the Office of Public Affairs of the Federal Trade Commission, took issue with a description of FTC Chairman James Miller as "a Reagan Visigoth busily sacking Washington." It was unfair, she felt, to use the name of these "peaceful, agricultural people" as a term of political opprobrium. "Happy souls, they knew no government or regulation in the modern sense."
Now, in the interest of the public's right to know, we present this communication Miss Spaeth received from a member of another tribe whose own image could use a little sprucing up. Mongolia Sept. 7, 1982 Merrie Spaethe Federal Trade Commission Washington, D.C. Dear Ms. Spaethe:
Read piece in paper you do on Visigoths. OK work. Visigoths get bum rap. Me too. How you like take on big job? My reputation been flooey for years. All Plutarch's fault, or mebbe Gibbon. One of those guys. Anyhow, mebbe you do piece for me for Washington Post or really big time paper like Grit. Explain how unhappy childhood made me unhappy guy too. Explain how pillaging merely effort to make world take notice of me. Explain how scratchy Mongolian clothes make anybody irrational. You get idea? Howzabout picture too? Mebbe me with little kid on knee doing tickle tickle, or with little dog or kitty? I smile big for picture. Not too big smile though cause back teeth all gone. Fatty foods bad for teeth. What you say? Mebbe we meet in FTC cafeteria for a tall and frosty sometime soon. See guy in Marketing Practices division for address and phone number.
Yours for a better tomorrow,
ATTILA Looks like I write in blood, huh? Just ink. Ha. Ha. (Old Hun joke)