At this special time of year, won't you take just a moment to think about those less fortunate than yourself? I'm referring, of course, to those Redskins fans who find themselves out of town during these crucial days before the Super Bowl.
Not for them the sublime pleasure of seeing interviews of Joe Gibbs at 5, 6 and 11. Not for them the serenity and sense of well-being that come from knowing that the morning paper will give more coverage to Darrell Green than to Donald Trump. And perhaps saddest of all, not for them the ineffable delight of whiling away hour after hour debating the relative merits of Doug Williams and Jay Schroeder.
Remember: it could have been you -- unable to see Joe Jacoby advertise big-screen television, lost in a city where burgundy-and-gold knit caps are not considered the height of fashion, surrounded by people who think Joe Bugel is a musician and George Rogers a gentle man in a cardigan. Imagine what life would be like without Sonny and Sam, without "Hail to the Redskins" on the radio, again and again and again, and without George Michael's subtle and insightful analysis (well, maybe you can imagine life without that).
But enough. Perhaps, moved by the plight of Redskins fans in exile, you're now wondering if you can help. You can. Send a fan you know -- by overnight mail, of course -- every day's Sports section. Call often -- to deliver late-breaking news about Art Monk's latest practice, to report on Dexter Manley's most recent pronouncement or just to reassure the fan that he or she isn't alone, that there are others in the world who believe that Western civilization reached its zenith during John Riggins' 44-yard run, who know for sure that Joe Gibbs isn't one of the guys who sang "Stayin' Alive" and who genuinely appreciate what Ali Haji-Sheikh has done for the game of football: put suspense back into extra points.
In closing, let me acknowledge that I am myself now living, or something along those lines, in New York. Now I know that this revelation may raise some questions in your mind: Does this guy have an ax to grind? Is he so devoid of journalistic integrity as to pretend to be writing a column out of compassion for others when he's actually part of the very group on whose behalf he's pleading? In short, is he just looking for sympathy?
You bet. -- Mark Goldberg