I knew we were close, so I was watching over Michelle Hall's shoulder as she tallied the Week Seven figures. When the smoke cleared, last year's record total of $334,486.01 was a record no longer. Here's what the numbers said:

Grand total to date: $334,823.43.

Total given this week: $47,029.66.

Individual donors to date: 4,759.

Group donors to date: 571.

The grand total is the grandest we have ever amassed in 36 years of fund-raising for Children's Hospital in this space. And we still have a week to go. Remarkable! Wonderful!

But let's not stop here. Let's push past 350 grand, and on toward 400, for the best cause of all: helping sick children get better.

The campaign runs for six more days. If you haven't done so already, please give today.

TO CONTRIBUTE TO THE CAMPAIGN:

Make a check or money order payable to Children's Hospital and mail it to Bob Levey, The Washington Post, Washington, D.C. 20071.

You've got to pretty dopey to mess with an inspector general's office. But that's what I went and did.

A few days ago, I listed the donation from the IG's staff at the Labor Department as being $38. Thirty-eight was how many cents they sent in, not how many dollars. The bucks totalled 127. Thanks and apologies, IG folks.

Donation of the Week comes from a group with a severe case of the clevers: The Bethesda Chapter of the Boring Speech Club of America.

Treasurer Daniel J. Gerwin mailed in the club's $60 donation. He said the club has met weekly since 1978. At each meeting, someone gives an extemporaneous boring speech. A recent spellbinder, for instance, was "The Importance of Sludge in Modern America."

I'm just glad the BSC passed the hat before the sludge speech, and not after. If they'd waited, everyone would have been too bored to reach for his wallet. Thanks, and happy ennui, gang.

*

More members of our 1984-85 Honor Roll:

The Law Offices of Martin P. Hoffman in Arlington ($3,153 collected at a Christmas party, which I was happy to attend).

The Wednesday Ladies Triples Bowling League from Glenmont Lanes ($50).

The men and women of the 113th Civil Engineer Flight of the D.C. Air National Guard ($155).

Burn Brae Dinner Theatre ($100).

The Sears Contract Sales Office in Bethesda ($225).

Alexandria's Shooter's Hill Carolers ($115.75).

The staff at Springbrook High School ($674).

The Government Systems Division at Western Union Telegraph Company ($245).

Defense Communications Agency, Command Control Systems Organization ($46).

The Office of Employment and Unemployment Statistics, Bureau of Labor Statistics ($45).

The employes of Griffin Cycle ($25).

Plant operators at the Washington Suburban Sanitary Commission's Piscataway Wastewater Treatment Plant ($106.96).

Fortuna Inc., of Bethesda ($37.50).

Kristin Wheeler's fourth graders at Cynthia Warner School in Takoma Park ($76).

"The Ladies of the Childrens Department" at the Falls Church Lord & Taylor ($115).

The Non-Smokers Bridge Club of Springfield ($15).

The Computer Sciences Corporation Mixed Handicap Bowling League ($67).

Employes of The Charles E. Smith Companies (a wondrous $2,126).

The DMA Office of Distribution Services ($28).

The gang at the Office of Transportation, General Services Administration ($578).

The "Santa Claus et al" group at The American Council of Life Insurance (the 14th year in a row this bunch has made a donation -- $1,465 this time).

The student government at Washington Irving Intermediate School in Springfield ($369.55).

Girard Engineering Ltd. of McLean ($900).

Project Speckled Trout, Andrews Air Force Base ($140).

Boy Scout Troop 701 of Bowie ($83).

Employes at Pulse Inc. and Pulse Engineering Inc. in College Park ($300).

The youth choir at St. Luke's Episcopal Church in Alexandria ($20).

Employes at Capital Region, Defense Investigative Service ($215).

The staff at the D.C. Department of Finance and Revenue -- Audit, Compliance and Investigation Administration ($325).

Employes at the American Geophysical Union ($240).

Employes at the Bureau of Economic Analysis, Department of Commerce ($242.50 in honor of June Trammell).

The Shoreham Hotel ($100, on behalf of its employes).

The employes of Koons Toyota in Annapolis ($18).

Friends and employes of Riordan's Restaurant in Silver Hill ($91 in memory of David P. Riordan).

Communications, Measuring, Testing and Lamp/Discharge Group 260, U.S. Patent and Trademark Office ($246).

Command and Control Support Agency, Deputy Chief of Staff for Operations and Plans, The Pentagon ($21).

The National Federal Marketing staff at AT&T Information Systems ($420).

Employes of The Northern Virginia Sun ($50).

"Friends in Photographic Services" at the National Geographic Society ($57).

Metro Barber Stylists on D Street SW ($100).

"The Boxing Day Bunch" ($235).

Employes in the Psychological Services Division of the Central Intelligence Agency ($110).

The employes of Century National Bank ($120).

Cissel-Saxon Post No. 41 of The American Legion ($100).

And Gaithersburg Aerie 3509 of the Fraternal Order of Eagles ($500).

As the kids would say, that's neat. Thank you!