So you think the wire-service football and basketball polls are all wet. So you're tired of FANS (Fight to Advance the Nation's Sports) saying, by the grace of Ralph Nader, it's speaking for you on issues. Well, here's a chance to do it yourself:

National Fan Poll.

Let founders Early Barker, president, and Doug Bullock, vice president, tell you about it:

"The coaches have their poll, the sportswriters have theirs; why not let the fans have a chance to pick the top collegiate teams each week? That is the philosophy of the newly formed National Fan Poll, a . . . company designed to give the sports fans across the nation a chance to vote for their favorite teams . . .

"Everyone is invited to participate by sending in their selections of the top 20 collegiate basketball teams. After the votes are in and tabulated, the results of the preseason survey will be released. At that point the Nationa1 Fan Poll plans to randomly pick around 1,000 of the preseason poll participants who will be asked to take part in the regular-season poll (to) vote for the top 20 every week during the season."

Sound good? The address is P. O. Box 2715, Chapel Hill, N.C. 27514.

No denying this was a Carolina football year. ACC statistical titlists Terpless: rushing, UNC freshman tailback Amos Lawrence, 121.1 yards a game; scoring, N.C. State junior Ted Brown, 84 points (Brown also beat Lawrence in total running yards, 1,251-1,211, in one more game): total offense, Clemson junior quarterback Steve Fuller, 172.7 yards per game; field goals, UNC senior Tom Biddle, 15; passing, Wake Forest senior Mike McGlamry, 1,532 yards total and 12.1 completions a game; receiving, Wake's senior tight end Steve Young from Gaithersburgh, Md., 51 catches; punting, Virginia junior Russ Henderson, 4.25 average on 85 (count 'em) boots.

The magnitude of the alleged misdemeanor of two N.C. State basketball regulars arrested in a Raleigh department store can now be shrunk to $1,48: accuser says they merely switched the 50-cent price tag on one pair of undershorts to a $1.98 pair . . .

Goodbye Clay Dalrymple, WJZ-TV-13 in Baltimore has signed Brooks Robinson to do Oriole color commentary the next three years, with possibly other assignments eventually The Third Baseman, picked by the station, will team with play-by-play men Chuck Thompson and Bill O'Donnell, picked by the ball club. Robinson said he was approached by network brass but felt he needed an "apprenticeship." Covering his old team, Brooksie offered, "I think I'll do a heck of a job". . . .

In York, Pa., the Tremont Restaurant where Baltimore Colts and their closest fans came to celebrate victories, or lick their wounds, burned down this week. The place was partly owned by Ordell Braase, who only a few days before had been honored on the silver-anniversary all-time Colts selected in voting by customers at a restaurant chain. Only two current Colts - offensive tackle George Kunz and punter David Lee - beat out the golden oldies: Don Shula outdistanced both Ted Marchibroda and Weeb Ewbank for coach. Mike Curtis led all linebackers with 25,285 on the 40,799 voting cards - so you know the balloting was about finished before he aroused Baltimore wrath with his Redskin antics against his old pals . . .

Then there was the "Meet the Colts" contest at Baltimore auto dealers; 70 younsters won the prize: a day at a Colt "secret practice session." At Redskin Park, George Allen and Double-O would have vetoed any such sneak attack, wouldn't they? . . . Roots: The Washington pro football team originated as the Boston Braves, leasing Braves Field, home of the National League baseball team. In 1933, they moved to Fenway Park, home of the Red Sox, so were rechristened Redskins. . . . With James Harris out hurt at San Diego, and Brian Sipe ditto at Cleveland Dave Mays of the Browns is not only a practicign dentist but the only starting black quarterback in the NFL. And so taken for granted, glory be, that his name was mentioned one time writeup (early edition, at least) of the Browns-Giants game in which he went the route as the winning pitcher . . .