Of course I'm ready for some football.
But first, here's our host, Freddie Prinze Jr., star of the laff-riot sitcom "Freddie," debuting next month on ABC!
And here's a concert featuring Good Charlotte, Kanye West, Maroon 5 and 17-year-old sensation Rihanna, four commercially viable musical acts carefully calibrated to please the niche-specific tastes of as many 18-to-34 year olds as possible! They'll be performing from Los Angeles -- a city that doesn't even have a football team!
And here's yet another performance, this one by the Rolling Stones! They have a tour and a new album to support, and the NFL has middle-agers to avoid alienating.
And there certainly won't be any deviations from the script by Kanye at this event. You might be able to run your mouth about the president, Kanye, but this is the NFL. They don't even let players wear high-top shoes. Still no word if West was fitted with an electro-shock collar.
So are you ready for some football, brought to you by Campbell's, Canon, Coors, Diet Pepsi, EA Sports, GMC, Burger King, DMI, Gatorade, Motorola and Visa? Are you ready for some Prozac?
-- David Larimer