Saints 19, Bills 7
The Alamodome may be only a quasi-home field for the Saints, but facing a quasi-quarterback like J.P Losman was all the advantage New Orleans needed. Not that all the gold pompoms given to fans weren't pretty helpful, as well; even Bills veterans who've faced Pittsburgh's "Terrible Towels" crumbled at the sight of San Antonio's "Petrifying Pompoms."
Redskins 20, Seahawks 17 (OT)
Lost amid all the hullabaloo over another Redskins win was the fine play of Seattle's rookie linebacker Lofa Tatupu, who accumulated 10 tackles and a sack. This comes as great news to Bill O'Reilly, who, of course, is a big fan of Lofas.
Buccaneers 17, Lions 13
The Bucs took a trip to Bizarro Land, where dynamic running back Carnell Williams was shut down while conservative quarterback Brian Griese accounted for 300 yards passing but four turnovers. Thank goodness the Lions were around to restore normalcy by losing.
Colts 31, Titans 10
Guess all Peyton Manning needed was a trip back to the land of "Rocky Top" to get him playing well again. Meanwhile, the play of the Titans indicated they're on their way to the land of rock bottom.
Giants 44, Rams 24
Big week for the Manning brothers, as Eli matched Peyton's thrilling exploits. Oldest brother Cooper joined in as well. He just saved a bunch of money on his car insurance by switching to Geico.
Chargers 41, Patriots 17
Things just keep going the Patriots' way: They get pummeled at home on the same day the Sawx clinch a spot in the playoffs. Tom Brady could have belted out "New York, New York" in a lavish halftime performance, and nobody would have noticed.
Ravens 13, Jets 3
New York's Brooks Bollinger was like manna from heaven for Baltimore fans, who had been cruelly deprived of watching an inept quarterback with a name containing "Boll" and "er."
Eagles 37, Chiefs 31
Just when you think it's finally over, the Donovan McNabb vs. Terrell Owens feud rears its head again. Except, this time, it's over which one is the early-season league MVP.
Falcons 30, Vikings 10
Daunte Culpepper, dreadful again and running out of excuses, is now claiming that he's been distracted by the ongoing travails of Kate Moss.
Broncos 20, Jaguars 7
Isn't it supposed to be difficult to play on Monday night, then travel across the country and beat a tough team? Apparently, Jerry Stackhouse isn't the only one who doesn't grasp the concept of a short week.
Bengals 16, Texans 10
Cincinnati stayed undefeated but suffered some misfortune when it lost not only its starting center, but his backup as well. The news got worse for the Bengals when they realized Vinny Testaverde wasn't available to fill in.
Raiders 19, Cowboys 13
Four games into the season and Kerry Collins still hasn't thrown an interception. Unlike, say, the time that GoldenPalace.com guy ran naked onto the field at Super Bowl XXXVIII, this is an NFL streak no one could have anticipated.
Cardinals 31, 49ers 14
Mexican fans weren't treated to a particularly compelling matchup, but in terms of exposing the league to another country, the NFL certainly accomplished its goooooooooooooaaaaaaaaaaaaalll.
-- Desmond Bieler