Chad Johnson on today's Bengals-Colts game: "This is not a football game. This is an historical event getting ready to happen." Alert Stephen Ambrose! . . .

Some say the Vikings are poised to make a run at the NFC North title, since they're 2-0 with Brad Johnson as the starting quarterback, including a win at the NFC East-leading Giants last week. If you believe that, you'll believe that the offense's total of 663 yards in 11 quarters with Johnson is exceptional, and that the recipe for success is to gain fewer than 150 yards and get all your scoring on defense and special teams. . . .

Why can't players squirt water into their own mouths when they come off the field? Awwww, is the big strong football player too tired to lift the water bottle all by himself? . . .

Today against the Eagles, Giants P Jeff Feagles will play in his 282nd consecutive game, tying the NFL record of former Vikings DL Jim Marshall. Impressive, especially considering punters and place kickers seem to be considered the most replaceable parts on NFL rosters. On the other hand, shouldn't there be a handicap system for this record? Shouldn't 282 games by a punter by equal to, say, 28 games by a lineman?