The Washington Post

What brand of tire would Carrie Underwood slash?

There are certain words that keep journalists up at night. Last night in my bedroom at 11:58 p.m., the word was “Michelins.”

NEW YORK, NY - APRIL 30: Singer Carrie Underwood visits the Z100 Elvis Duran Morning Show at Z100 Studio on April 30, 2012 in New York City. (Getty Images)

Great song, but I still had a question: What brand of tire would Carrie Underwood slash? Firestones? It didn’t sound right. Goodyears are popular — but that made me think of the blimp, which would muddle a jack-o-lantern metaphor I was setting up. Should I call my truck-owning cousins? “Hey, man! Sorry for not calling the past seven Christmases, but, um, do you like Carrie Underwood? And what kind of tires are you using these days?” Nah.

I went to a consumer site that said Michelins were the highest-ranked brand of tire for pickup trucks. I liked the sound of “Michelins” and I came up with some fall-back reasoning, too. If it turns out Michelins are for losers, that’s fine. Carrie’s cheating beau is a loser. Michelins. Michelins. Michelins, Regis. Final answer.

“Double-cross this one and she’ll carve up the Michelins on your pickup like a jack-o’-lantern,” I wrote.

At 9:39 a.m.Tuesday, I received an email from a reader in Takoma Park:

“Subject: Michelins? MICHELINS?????

Hey Chris --  No self-respecting country music fan is going to have Michelins on the truck.  We use Goodyear. . . .”

My impulse is to trust a reader passionate enough to use five question marks in a subject line, but just in case, I’ll be arriving at my next Carrie Underwood concert an hour early so I can scope out the tires in the parking lot.

Chris Richards has been the Post's pop music critic since 2009. He's recently written about the bliss of summer songs, the woe of festival fatigue and a guide on how to KonMari your record collection.


Success! Check your inbox for details. You might also like:

Please enter a valid email address

See all newsletters

Show Comments
Most Read


Success! Check your inbox for details.

See all newsletters

Your Three. Videos curated for you.
Play Videos
From clubfoot to climbing: Double amputee lives life of adventure
Learn to make traditional soup dumplings
Deaf banjo player teaches thousands
Play Videos
Unconventional warfare with a side of ale
The rise and fall of baseball cards
How to keep your child safe in the water
Play Videos
'Did you fall from heaven?': D.C.'s pick-up lines
5 ways to raise girls to be leaders
How much can one woman eat?
Play Videos
How to get organized for back to school
How to buy a car via e-mail
The signature drink of New Orleans