It was a major celebrity interview moment, during which Jon Stewart and Pattinson talked about nothing, then occasionally paused to endorse Ben & Jerry’s ice cream before resuming the process of talking without actually delivering content.
The interview started out on a promising note when Stewart produced two pints of Ben & Jerry’s, the international symbol for having a heart-to-heart about relationship troubles.
“We’re just a couple of gals talking,” Stewart said as he dug in to his frozen treat. “Tell me everything.”
And then Pattinson told him everything, depending on what your definition of everything is.
If by everything you mean that Edward Cullen joked about how he was wearing two pairs of Spanx and noted that he’s too cheap to hire a publicist and desperately needs one, then yes, he was incredibly forthcoming.
As they slurped awkwardly at their rapidly melting ice cream, Stewart once again tried to turn the interview into a confessional conversation.
“The last time I had a break-up, Ben & Jerry’s took me through some of the tougher times, so I thought you and I could bond over this and talk about ‘Boy you are better off, kick her to the curb.’”
Pattinson laughed, but didn’t do what one might have hoped in that moment: respond by saying, “Jon, you don’t even know. I found out that she was cheating on me when we were backstage at the Teen Choice Awards. I started to scream at her, but then Carly Rae Jepsen was standing nearby and it got so awkward....”
Sadly, this did not occur. Instead Pattinson engaged in more awkward banter, spoke briefly about his role in David Cronenberg’s “Cosmopolis” and then begged “Twilight” fans to see his new movie. But here’s the good news: there are at least two more high-profile Pattinson interviews this week that may be more revealing: his sit-down on “Good Morning America” Wednesday and another live chat Thursday night on MTV.
In terms of the interview approaches previously suggested for Pattinson by this blog, it seems the actor went with the much more awkward version of the Sandra Bullock option: avoid the subject of the Stewart affair and don’t even say his alleged ex’s name.
He also tossed a new strategy into the mix: When unsure what to do or say during a major media appearance, just keep eating ice cream. Here’s video of the entire creamy and sugary experience.