Steve Martin, hosting the Oscars in 2001. (TIMOTHY A. CLARY/AFP)

Steve Martin, comedic master, banjo player and three-time host of the Academy Awards, has written an open letter to this year’s Oscar host, Eddie Murphy.

The letter, disseminated via Martin’s Twitter account, offers all kinds of sage advice to his “Bowfinger” co-star, who will emcee the Feb. 26 Oscar ceremony.

Like: “Whatever you do, don’t have a co-host. They’re a big pain and they just end up breaking your SNL hosting record.”

And: “Start slimming down now, you looked kinda paunchy in ‘Norbit.’”

Also, in what might count as Martin’s best piece of advice: “Remember to relax and have a good time while 12,000 live bloggers rip you to shreds.” (Oh, Mr. Martin. That’s not a fair statement. It’s more like 15,000, at least.)

In conclusion, the former Wild and Crazy Guy writes: “Eddie, since you and I are old friends, and I sincerely thought you deserved an oscar nomination for ‘Bowfinger,’ the movie we did together that stands alone in comedy history, from which we get no credit or acknowledgement except large paychecks and drivers and any type of food we wanted delivered to us every day in our really nice trailers, I wish you all the best on your Oscar hosting gig.”