Meet Kate Gosselin, your cruise director. (Darron Cummings/AP)

[Insert record-scratching sound here.]

“Kate Gosselin? Uh, I said dream vacation not recurring reality TV nightmare.”

Well, apparently to some people, a six-day, seven-night cruise through the Western Caribbean with Gosselin — noted author, mother and coupon blogger — qualifies as a very desirable travel excursion.

Royal Caribbean and Luxury Cruises & Tours is offering the aforementioned cruise — which sets sail in August — at costs ranging from $1,900 to $5,500 for a spot on the massive Allure of the Seas. (Ship capacity: 6,000 passengers.) What do you get for that money, aside from access to the ship’s onboard merry-go-round, the opportunity for some ziplining and stops in Labadee, Haiti, Falmouth, Jamaica and Cozumel, Mexico?

Oh, you get lots of potential Gosselin time, including a cocktail party with Kate Gosselin, a private barbecue with Kate Gosselin, family games with Kate Gosselin, a craft session with Kate Gosselin and a book signing with Kate Gosselin, where she’ll happily sign books written by Kate Gosselin.

“Who the heck is going to pay--?”

I’m going to interrupt before you even finish asking that question because, according to Charlene Failla, president of Luxury Cruises and Tours, there has already been plenty of interest in the cruise, which began accepting reservations Friday.

“As soon as Kate tweeted [information about the cruise] on Friday afternoon, our phones lit up with inquiries,” Failla says. “It took off.”

Bookers have included couples, individuals and — not surprisingly — some families with multiple children.

When I asked if the initial interest in this cruise seemed higher than what she had seen with other celebrity cruises, Failla said, “It seemed like it exploded.”

Failla confirmed that Gosselin will be compensated for her week-long trip to paradise, as is standard for celebrity cruise hosts. But she wouldn’t reveal how much the mother of eight is being paid. She also said it’s possible some of the Gosselin children may come aboard.

”We really don’t know” if she’s bringing all of them, Failla said. “She did say she was bringing some of them.”

“Uh-oh, what if I’ve lost my opportunity to book the Kate Gosselin cruise?”

Not to worry. There is still plenty of space. But don’t wait too long.

“She really does have a following,” Failla said, “and people seem to like a lot of her nurturing ways.”