Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries, soon-to-be husband and wife. (Pascal Le Segretain/GETTY IMAGES)

Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries are getting married this Saturday. While many are speculating about what her Vera Wang wedding gown will look like or suggesting which A-listers have made the guest list (allegedly Justin Bieber, Jennifer Lopez, Jay-Z and Beyonce and Will Smith and Jada Pinkett-Smith, among others), Celebritology is currently focused on more practical matters: which items remain on the Kardashian/Humphries registry.

With only five days left to choose the perfect gift for the couple who has everything and could easily afford to buy any future everything that may become available to consumers, what present should you give to Kardashian and Humphries?

Unfortunately, many of the items on their registry at the upscale Geary’s of Beverly Hills already have been purchased. (Dang, I had so planned to give them that $1,750 art deco coffee pot. I bet Bieber bought it, that punk.)

But a few of the many overpriced vases, perfume bottles, ash trays and various other extremely fragile and unnecessary containers for rich-people stuff are still available. Here are just a few of the remaining Kardashian registry gifts. Buy one of them quickly, before Beyonce beats you to it.

(All via Geary’s.)

One can never have too many vases. Well, one can. But apparently Kim Kardashian can’t since she and Humphries have registered for six of them. This one, at the bargain price of nearly $8 K, as previously noted by Sarah Hughes, is still available, probably because no one can justify spending that kind of money on something that’s just going to collect dust on an even more expensive end table.

Havana Ashtray. Price: $840.

Good news! There are still plenty of china and cutlery options on the registry. For example, Kim and Kris still need 24 of these $305 plates. Why not spring for the full dozen? That only costs $7,320 dollars before tax.

KT Ice tongs Silverplate. Price: $205