Rufus Wainwright, a man who can make bubble gum jingles alternately jaunty and mournful. (Gareth Cattermole/Getty Images for Sundance/AEG EU)

Funny or Die posted a spectacular video last week of Rufus Wainwright singing commercial jingles for various brands of bubblegum. As we regular trollers of the blogosphere already know, a video published six days ago is actually 87 years old in Internet time. But I was on vacation last week and didn’t see it until today. As someone who adores both Mr. Wainwright and joyful melodies about the wonders of gnawing on bubblegum, I feel compelled to share it with you now. Because it is a delight.

I mean, I always thought the Extra sugar free gum song was about the value of flavor that lasted for an extra-long time, or at least for the duration of a spirited kayaking excursion.

Turns out, per the Rufus version, it’s the perfect mellow, vaguely melancholy number to listen to while sipping a Mimosa at a Sunday jazz brunch.

I also was under the impression that Big Red existed primarily to enable consenting adults, as well as Ralphie from “A Christmas Story” and some chick who digs tuba players, to make out for extended periods of time.

But no! As Rufus has finally made clear, those cinnamonny sticks are actually symbols of how important it is to eke as much joy as we can from the fleeting moments of this silly escapade we call life. Oh, Rufus. Is there any pseudo-melody you can’t turn into a heartbreaking number of staggering genius? Or, to put it another way: Can you do a follow-up video in which you give similar treatment to old McDonald’s jingles? Because I am certain that you could turn this ridiculous McDLT song (featuring Jason Alexander!) into an operatic work of art that would make me weepy over the concept of keeping the hot side hot and the cool side cool.

Hand me a tissue, then watch Wainwright work his vocal magic below.