After electoral victories in three states saved his venerable stache from destruction, he increased the ante while on “Morning Joe,” volunteering to demolish this American treasure for the cause of epilepsy research.
This shall not pass! Does he dislike epilepsy research? First, he pits Mustache Preservation against Civic Duty; now, Mustache Preservation must go head-to-head with Supporting Good Causes? Has he no shame? After his loyal mustache fought its way out of the electoral gladiatorial arena, staggering but victorious, he demands that it turn again and battle for its life? At least allow the thing to rest.
Mustaches should not be so lightly bandied about. A mustache is a terrible thing to waste, and it is this cavalier attitude that has made them retreat in terror to their traditional haunts on the upper lips of hipsters and ’70s porn stars.
Nor, as New York Magazine’s Dan Amira points out, should Joe Scarborough’s failure to grow a mustache as he promised be allowed to pass so lightly. You lose a bet, you grow a mustache. $10,000 for epilepsy research and a promise to perform some embarrassing stunts are nothing to shake a stick at, but an oath to grow a mustache is a sacred oath. “This is exactly the type of thing President Obama was referring to on the campaign trail when he talked about the rich ‘playing by a different set of rules,’ ” Amira notes. “A single mother working a double shift as a waitress would have had to grow that mustache.”
Especially during Movember, this is a shameful act indeed.