According to a recent Gallup poll, the two candidates voters are most likely to pick as a nominee are Mitt Romney and Newt Gingrich. Romney boasts 20 percent of voter support and Gingrich 19 percent. Herman Cain follows closely behind with 16 percent among Republicans nationwide — although among only registered Republicans, Gingrich leads by a nose, with 22 percent to Romney’s 21 percent.
For voters having difficulty picking between the two (or still stuck on Santorum), here is a helpful side-by-side guide.
| Mitt Romney || Newt Gingrich |
|loves talking with PowerPoints || loves talking |
|disappointed that he is not the definite front-runner yet ||disappointed that he has not been canonized yet |
|sent leftover pizza to the Obama campaign headquarters once, awkwardly ||would never send away perfectly usable pizza |
|“Corporations are people, my friend.” ||“Right-wing social engineering” |
|believes God visited America ||believes God visited America and served as speaker of the House in the 1990s |
|has been a governor before ||“Has been president before, yes? No? I thought I had.” |
|once worked for Bain Capital ||once worked as Bane of the Capitol |
|bears an uncanny resemblance to Mr. Fantastic, who has an unnaturally stretchy body due to an accident in outer space, which could be useful in moments of crisis ||almost definitely the inspiration for Nute Gunray, a slimy alien in the Star Wars prequels who lacks a nose, which could be useful in moments of crisis. |
|”There are a lot of reasons not to elect me.” ||”There’s no question at times of my life, partially driven by how passionately I felt about this country, that I worked far too hard and things happened in my life that were not appropriate.” |
|owes it all to his family and the faith of those who have supported him ||owes it all to Tiffany’s, but will probably be able to pay soon at the rate book sales are going |
Alexandra Petri writes the ComPost blog, offering a lighter take on the news and opinions of the day. She is the author of "A Field Guide to Awkward Silences".