This is probably for the best. Once the promotion was announced, everyone was up in arms.
Gawker poked fun at it. Stephen Colbert quipped, “That’s right. Whoever uses their brief time at the national mic to ask the candidates, ‘Sausage or pepperoni?’ will receive free Pizza Hut pizza for life. And just to be clear, that’s meant to be a reward.”
Still, the withdrawal of the promotion leaves something of a void.
“What,” as Stephen Colbert asked, “is more American than using our electoral process for product placement?"
There is still time for other corporate entities to fill the void.
Here are a few Sponsored Frivolous Questions that it is still possible to work into the debate. You’re welcome, Corporate America!
Q: What would you do for a Klondike bar?
Q: Is there a wrong way to eat a Reese’s?
Q: Boxers or briefs?
Q: Did Han shoot first?
Q: How do you feel about Glenn Beck’s “1791” clothing line, specifically the denim?
Q: Godfather: Part One or Godfather: Part Two?
Q: Edward or Jacob?
Q: Gale or Peeta?
Q: Harry Potter or The Casual Vacancy?
Q: Acai or quinoa?
Q: At Urban Outfitters, do you gravitate toward the porcelain decorations that look like owls or porcelain decorations that look like antlers?
Q: iPhone or Android?
Q: Call Me Maybe or Gangnam Style?
Q: Macy’s Presidents’ Day bargains or Macy’s year-round savings?
Q: Would you rather eat at Olive Garden or have a rabid hamster crawl slowly up your pant leg?
Q: Do you think it is necessary to have seen the Blue Man Group perform at least once before you die?
Q: Sondheim or Andrew Lloyd Webber?
Q: Cthulhu or Venganza?
Q: Why don’t more people watch OWN? Are there lessons in that for the economy at large?
Q: Match.com or Chemistry.com?
Q: Nascar or dressage?
Q: Star Wars or Lord of the Rings?
Q: Are you more of a Samantha or more of a Charlotte?
Q: Would you describe yourself as a Jessa or a Marnie?
Q: You’re stranded on a desert island with only one Justin Bieber album. What’s your favorite brand of rope?