Follow the example of your famously conic bra and come to a point! (Evan Agostini/AP)

For anyone else on tenterhooks after Madonna’s recent comments about how we had a black Muslim in the White House, calm down. Return to your homes. There is nothing more to see.

Celebritology updates, with a quote from Madge’s spokeswoman:

 “I was being ironic on stage. Yes, I know Obama is not a Muslim — though I know that plenty of people in this country think he is. And what if he were? The point I was making is that a good man is a good man, no matter who he prays to. I don’t care what religion Obama is — nor should anyone else in America.”

I alighted on Madonna’s remark because it was a neat encapsulation of three bad reasons to vote.

So now, actually, it’s four bad reasons to vote for anyone: because of something erroneous that a pop star said — ironically — that has little to do with the sort of job you think the president is doing. So, er, thank you, Madonna. Enjoy your week. The only thing worse than being talked about because you called the president a black Muslim ironically is not being talked about. I miss the days when people who were being ironic onstage were talking about how fortunate Oedipus was in his marriage.

What a strange week it’s been. First, I hoped that Mitt Romney was joking. Then I worried Madonna might be serious. And we still have 41 more days until the election.