I also invite you to sign up for my once-daily e-mail newsletter, Scrumps, a subscription-based service that is the same as The PS but it only comes once a day and I promise it will go straight to your spam and you will never even know it’s there.
I also invite you to sign up for my premium subscription service, Noope, which is just a signed promise that I will never e-mail you, although it would have been monthly if I had.
While you’re at it, be sure to Like and Follow me on Facebook, where you can receive daily updates whenever I write something, read an article worth sharing or if I just have an experience in a restaurant that I only wanted to tell my friends about, but I clicked “Public” by mistake.
And be sure to check out my Tumblr!
PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS HOLY CLICK ON SOMETHING is my username on Pinterest! Friend me!
You can also find me on Instagram (@thisusernameisterrible) but I really don’t get the ethos of it yet and all of my pictures so far are just me being mad about the changes to the $10 bill so if you have done all the other things don’t feel compelled to do this.
help help surely this is hell but it is the world we live in now I guess is my Vine username — please add me!
And don’t forget to subscribe to my YouTube channel (In This Media Landscape We Are All Tinkerbell And If You Don’t Applaud Or Show Approval In Some Manner We Shall Surely Perish) for daily videos!
Follow me on Spotify! My handle is I Literally Am Not That Interesting This Is Torture.
Actually follow me on Twitter!
And don’t forget to friend me on Goodreads, so that every few weeks you can get a notification stating that ‘Alex has posted a review of ‘A Pilgrim’s Progress’ and then be panicked and irritable as you ask yourself ‘WHO THE [Noun] is ALEX’?
And be sure to check out this Kickstarter, where you can support my live jazz album — and remember, it’s only possible with subscribers like you and maybe not even then.
And, while you’re at it, be sure to check out my Patreon where you can support my work on a subscription basis, now offering special perks to subscribers like an ornate table centerpiece I made using all four of the remaining parts of my dignity!
I also invite you to subscribe to “THIS ISN’T FUN ANYMORE CAN WE STOP,” my fortnightly podcast, with special guests and live conversation, delivered into your inbox every fortnight on the fortnight.
And hey, if you liked this, please subscribe to my other podcast, “I Give Up. Here Are Some Cat Noises,” which is just me making cat noises once a month while stating the names of people in the news and whispering ‘please send help this is unsustainable’ too close to the microphone.
I KNOW YOU HAVE NO REASON TO LOVE ME
LITERALLY ALL YOU DID WAS CLICK ON THIS ARTICLE WHICH WAS A TOP TEN LIST ABOUT CELEBRITY PLASTIC SURGERY OR TEN ALARMING MISTAKES IN FAMOUS MOVIES OR PEOPLE WHO AGED AND IT IS HARD TO BELIEVE
YOU DON’T KNOW ME
I DON’T KNOW YOU
BUT SOMEONE HAS TO SUBSCRIBE
PLEASE PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF EVERYTHING JUST SUBSCRIBE TO ONE OF THESE THINGS is my Snapchat username. Add me!
Don’t forget to share this post everywhere, especially…