Democratic presidential nominee Hillary Clinton and her Republican opponent Donald Trump answered questions on national security and foreign policy Sept. 7 during a "commander-in-chief forum" on NBC News. (Video: NBC News/Photos: Melina Mara/Post, Mike Segar/Reuters)

“Well, I just don’t think she has a presidential look, and you need a presidential look.”
Donald Trump, Sept. 6

Trump is not wrong that Hillary Clinton does not have That Presidential Look. She is, after all, female, something that no prior president has had the misfortune to be.

And if there is one sort of content that women need more of, it is an article about how to look a certain way. So here is a quick guide to getting That Presidential Look.


George Washington (White House Collection/White House Historical Association)

George Washington

To Get This Look: Lose all but one of your teeth. Replace them with an elaborate contraption containing hippopotamus ivory, brass screws and human teeth so that you look slightly uncomfortable at all times. To complete the outfit, steal Ruth Bader Ginsburg’s neckwear.


John Adams (Portrait by Benjamin Blyth, Massachusetts Historical Association via Wikimedia Commons)

John Adams

To Get This Look: Do a bad job of describing Princess Leia’s hairstyle to your hairdresser. Watch forlornly but uncomplainingly as he completely fails to achieve it. Make the face of a sad cat that has just been turned into a human being and doesn’t know what to make of the change. Take no care of your body.

Thomas Jefferson (White House Collection/White House Historical Association)

Thomas Jefferson

To Get This Look: Be a wealthy plantation owner. Imagine the kind of simple clothing that you think a member of the Common People might wear, then wear that all the time. (Otherwise known as a “reverse Trump.”)


James Madison (White House Collection/White House Historical Association)

James Madison

To Get This Look: Forget to sleep for four days. Dress up, halfheartedly, as a vampire. When asked to pose, think about people who annoy you and children who have done some nonsense.


James Monroe (White House Collection/White House Historical Association)

James Monroe

To Get This Look: Have one of those faces where everyone thinks they know you from somewhere, but it turns out they’re thinking of Billy Eichner or Liam Neeson or the guy playing the bland president on “Scandal.”


John Quincy Adams (Portrait by George Caleb Bingham/Google Art Project via Wikimedia Commons)

John Quincy Adams

To Get This Look: Have a little hair on your face, but not on the right parts of your face. If people mistake you for a Dickens Schoolmaster, Fatcat Banker Who Has Just Seen A Major Investment Go Horribly Awry, or Old Man Who Just Wants To Take His Nap, you are nailing it.


Andrew Jackson (Portrait by Ralph Eleaser Whiteside Earl – Google Art Project via Wikimedia Commons)

Andrew Jackson

To Get This Look: Someone just to the left of the portrait painter has just told you disturbing news, but you cannot do anything about it until the painter finishes. Also, you have just been mildly electrocuted.

Accessorize with your best curtain.


Andrew Jackson (1844/45 photo, Wikimedia Commons)

Older Andrew Jackson

DON’T GET THIS LOOK! THIS LOOK IS NO GOOD!

Martin Van Buren (Sparnestaad Photo via Wikimedia Commons)

Martin Van Buren

To Get This Look: Ask your stylist, “What if I were a bowling pin, but with hair?”

“Do you want your ears to be visible at all?”

“Absolutely not.”


William Henry Harrison (White House Collection/White House Historical Association)

William Henry Harrison

To Get This Look: Brush all your hair in the wrong direction. Become a disembodied head.

John Tyler (Library of Congress Prints and Photographs Division via Wikimedia Commons)

John Tyler

To Get This Look: Tell your stylist, “Worried schoolmaster on a British TV show” or “a man who goes a-courting and sits in the corner, too nervous to speak, then gets back on his horse and rides off without saying a word of his errand.” Alternatively, put Martin Van Buren in the dryer for too long.


James K. Polk (National Archives and Records Administration via Wikimedia Commons)

James K. Polk

To Get This Look: Develop the haunted, empty eyes of a man whose signature look has somehow become a mullet-turtleneck combo.


Zachary Taylor (Half-Plate Daguerrotype 1843-45 via Wikimedia Commons)

Zachary Taylor

To Get This Look: Glue some straw to your head and spend the next twenty years drinking grain alcohol in blistering sunlight.


Millard Fillmore (White House Collection/White House Historical Association)

Millard Fillmore

To Get This Look: Gain just a little more weight than required to audition for the role of the “Batman” villain Penguin, but not quite enough to play that Baron Harkonnen guy from “Dune.” Then own it.


Franklin Pierce (Matthew Brady Photo in Library of Congress Prints and Photographs Division via Wikimedia Commons)

Franklin Pierce

To Get This Look: Spend hours painstakingly curling your hair, then walk out into a rainstorm. Don’t do anything to fix it.


James Buchanan (Wikimedia Commons)

James Buchanan

To Get This Look: Don’t. James Buchanan doesn’t look like a Kewpie Doll. Kewpie Dolls look like James Buchanan. This hair is the second-worst thing that James Buchanan just sat back and allowed to happen, after the Civil War.


Abraham Lincoln (Alexander Gardner, Library of Congress, via Wikimedia Commons)

Abraham Lincoln

To Get This Look: Never sleep, ever. Look like you have forgotten the meaning of the word sleep. Grow a beard, but the wrong beard.


Andrew Johnson (Library of Congress Matthew Brady Collection via Wikimedia Commons)

Andrew Johnson

To Get This Look: Have mean, beady little eyes. Get an unflattering bowl cut that is exactly wrong for your face and let it grow out to a length that is even worse.


Ulysses S. Grant (Library of Congress via Wikimedia Commons)

Ulysses S. Grant

To Get This Look: Drink continuously all throughout the Civil War. Do not stop drinking when the war ends. Why bother shaving your neck beard? It always grows back, anyhow. Start buttoning your vest, then stop. What’s the point? What’s the point of anything?


Rutherford B. Hayes (Library of Congress Prints and Photographs Division via Wikimedia Commons)

Rutherford B. Hayes

To Get This Look: Remember that someone once said that a beard would be a good look for you, but forget anything he said to you afterward about the importance of beard care. Let a bird sleep there.


James A. Garfield (Library of Congress Matthew Brady Collection via Wikimedia Commons)

James Garfield

To Get This Look: Remember that someone once said that a beard would be a good look for you, and remember some of the things he said to you afterward about the importance of beard care.


Chester A. Arthur (White House Collection/White House Historical Association)

Chester Arthur

To Get This Look: Fully. Commit.

“Chester,” his friends asked, “don’t you think it’s a little much to pull off? The sideburns, the fur coat, the mustache, the ring?”

“How dare you even ask that question of someone who has pulled off being named Chester for years?” he shot back.


Grover Cleveland (White House Collection/White House Historical Association)

Grover Cleveland

To Get This Look: Ask your stylist, “What if Joseph Stalin were a concerned family doctor?”

Benjamin Harrison (Library of Congress Prints and Photographs Division via Wikimedia Commons)

Benjamin Harrison

To Get This Look: Moisturize less.

William McKinley (Courtney Art Studio 1896 via Wikimedia Commons)

William McKinley

To Get This Look: “Okay,” the people behind William McKinley asked, “what if we made Sam the Eagle human? Would it be horrifyingly weird-looking or would we elect it president?”

“Only one way to find out.”


Teddy Roosevelt (Library of Congress via Wikimedia Commons)

Teddy Roosevelt

To Get This Look: Go to the beach. Take a picture of a walrus. Find an unscrupulous plastic surgeon, give him the picture, and tell him, “Do your best.” Dress the result up as a ludicrous dandy.


William Howard Taft (George Grantham Bain in Library of Congress Prints and Photographs Division via Wikimedia Commons)

William Howard Taft

Get This Look: Eat an entire ham. Now another ham. You’re doing great! Just 83 more hams to go!


Woodrow Wilson (Library of Congress via Wikimedia Commons)

Woodrow Wilson

Get This Look: Suck a lemon. Oh no, nothing is all right. Nothing will ever be all right again.


Warren G. Harding (Library of Congress via Wikimedia Commons)

Warren Harding

To Get This Look: Draw dark eyebrows on a sinister hypnotist, then live in an era when people had confused ideas about what an attractive man looked like.


Calvin Coolidge (Library of Congress Prints and Photographs Division via Wikimedia Commons)

Calvin Coolidge

To Get This Look: “What do you want your aesthetic to say?”

“I want to leave this party now. Please do not try to talk to me.”

“Anything else?”

“No.”


Herbert Hoover (Library of Congress Prints and Photographs Division via Wikimedia Commons)

Herbert Hoover

Get This Look: Try to look calm and reassuring, like a grown-up Gerber Baby who definitely is not PANICKING about the Great Depression.


Franklin Delano Roosevelt (Vincenzo Laviosa, Google Art Project via Wikimedia Commons)

Franklin Delano Roosevelt

To Get This Look: Demand “that classic Abraham Lincoln saggy eye.” Accept no substitute.

Harry Truman (Truman Library via Wikimedia Commons)

Harry Truman

Get This Look: First, announce that you have the nuclear bomb. Then, ask whether anyone thinks your glasses are right for your face.


Dwight Eisenhower (Eisenhower Library via Wikimedia Commons)

Dwight Eisenhower

Get This Look: PUT ON A BROWN SUIT AND STOP CARING.


John F. Kennedy (Wikimedia Commons)

John F. Kennedy

To Get This Look: These seemingly effortless good looks are actually the result of a tragic wager against the Prince of Darkness. For one brief shining moment, you will think you have won the wager, and during that time you will not need to worry about your hair or face at any time; they will just look flawless on their own.


Lyndon Johnson (LBJ Library via Wikimedia Commons)

Lyndon Johnson

Get This Look: Take some of the hair from your head and transplant it into and around your ears.


Richard Nixon (U.S. National Archives and Records Administration via Wikimedia Commons)

Richard Nixon

Get This Look: Sweat constantly and profusely. Sleep badly.


Gerald Ford (Wikimedia Commons)

Gerald Ford

Get This Look: Perfect the smile of someone just now getting a joke that was told half an hour ago.


Jimmy Carter (National Archives and Records Administration via Wikimedia Commons)

Jimmy Carter

To Get This Look: As you get dressed each morning, repeat the mantra, “It is important that people who look at my pictures be able to tell from my hair and clothes that it is the ’70s.”


Ronald Reagan (Hulton Archive/Getty Images)

Ronald Reagan

To Get This Look: Strive to be camera-ready at all times, with the result that people who see you in the flesh find you prematurely orange and slightly melted-looking.


President George H.W. Bush on phone, with White House Chief of Staff John Sununu standing behind him, in the White House dealing with news of the Iraqi invasion and occupation of Kuwait, on August 1, 1990. ( Susan Biddle/White House/The LIFE Picture Collection/Getty Images)

George H.W. Bush

To Get This Look: Two words: “Tootsie glasses.”


President Clinton goes for a morning jog on the Mall in Washington in this May 21, 1993, photo. (Doug Mills/Associated Press)

Bill Clinton

To Get This Look: One hyphenated word: blow-dryer. Also, whenever about to go jogging, cut six to eight inches off your shorts.


Former president George W. Bush unveils his official White House portrait during a ceremony in the East Room of the White House on May 31, 2012. (Jason Reed/Reuters)

George W. Bush

To Get This Look: Acquire a perpetual squint as though trying to read text just a bit too far away for comfort. Hunch slightly.


President Obama delivers remarks on the police shootings in Dallas after meeting with E.U. leaders at the NATO Summit in Warsaw on July 8. (Jonathan Ernst/Reuters)

Barack Obama

To Get This Look: Enter office comparatively young and spry. Then try running this place for eight years.